 
  Sometimes I can’t stand to see my own reflection. I can’t seem to see that the person in the mirror is me. I try to not look but when I do I suddenly break down, the world crashes around me. I am unable to do what I normally would which is distance myself from everyone and fade away into my own place. It feels like everyone is screaming at […]
Hi there. I’m a suicide survivor. I want to share my story to everyone that is going through the same thing. I have type one diabetes and that was one of the main reasons why I got made fun of, including my looks. I’m very insecure and I hate it. I’m a survivor. I wanted to die. I got a pocket knife and I was going to do it, but my brother walked in on me and he stopped me. He let me cry into him the whole night. A few weeks ago, I drank bleach. I threw away the bottle and my mom saw […]
My friend Tennyson.. Actually, I like him. And he knows that. But he doesn’t like me. I know he doesn’t. He said so. Anyway, on the bus earlier, he pulled out a pocket knife and cut himself. I could literally feel my heart ripping itself apart because there was absolutely nothing I could do. I told him to get on facebook, but I doubt that he will. The worst part is that I heard his friend say, “Well, why do you want to kill yourself?!”. I don’t want him to die. God, he’s been going to therapy.. I don’t know what to do. I love […]
I don’t want to die, but I don’t want to live either.
Maybe that’s not entirely true, sometimes I’d really like to die. Like the time I took twenty pills and stared up at the ceiling waiting for it all to be over. But something always pulls me back. Ten minutes into it, my little brother came in to comfort me. I had been upset after my mom had another one of her episodes and lashed out at me. He told me that she didn’t mean it and that he would be there for me. It was in that moment that I didn’t want to die […]
I have fought severe depression and schizophrenia for a number of years. I go through bad times and then I can suffer through hell for months to a year or so at a time. As I write this I am in a downer period, voices constantly abuse me and tell me to kill myself and hallucinations frighten the absolute shit out of me to the point where I am screaming for help and crying my eyes out. I have had a number of suicide attempts but have been interrupted because of being on constant suicide watch. I did however have 2 very close attempts, on […]
Some people may skim, not look at this post or think I’ve gone insane.. But for the past few nights I’ve been having vivid nightmares.. The same ones continuing every night. Where someone i love takes me and touchers me, beats me, and cuts my sides open with a pocket knife not sharp but sharp enough to make my sides bleed. After they would bandage me, wait for it to heal and do it all over again. Its really scary but one of my friends said “Meg ur ok its just a dream, its not actually happening you’ll b fine” Â To him that maybe […]
No! I am not a lycanthrope!
Now that that is out of the way…
Here is an example of the source of all my problems, as well as the source of happiness in my life. You’ll probably be confused by that statement, but if you lived with it for a while, you’d understand.
So today I went out back to water my rows of tobacco plants. I did that methodically, one at a time, from left to right. I checked on the progress of my seedlings, watered those, then I took a walk around the yard and inspected the other individual plants growing there; I looked at the […]
ok so im not completely alone my sister and friend is here but that means nothing but not being hit my dad is home too, but came home looked me in the eye and said i have destroyed him he now wants nothing to do with me. haha he wonders why i wanna move out..get a clue damnit! my mom is shoppin i sit here in bed bleeding all over my white sheets and blanket i took a very sharp pocket knife and slit my arm deep. the pain is intense but to me looks beautiful and relieves some of my pain. i wanna die […]
You see the heart symbolizes so much in both our society and various veins of creative writing. The human heart symbolizes; life, love, emotional anguish, and even endurance (e.g. the durability of the human heart is notoriously difficult to burn/destroy completely).
So an individual that has gone through a lot of emotional and or romantic pain would naturally choose to injure their chest/heart area of the body in order to send a message to the people they left behind, perhaps only one person in particular. Or […]
i fought through everything in my life, starvation, homeless, abandment, even times i wanted to take a bunch of pills and end it or excape for a little while,i stopt abusing pills when i was 19,i thought if u fight like u want what you see and want what you crave in life then it has to happen,my family dont give a shit about me, my dad only calls to ask if i heard from my twin and how shes doing, can somebody atleast act like they care?o i forgot ,people do, and they end up showing who they really are wen they leave you […]
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