Tag:

Prospects

Fade

by erinphantom 6/14/2013

written by erinphantom

I can’t remember when I haven’t felt like IÂ am Â just waking up because I have to.Â If it was physically possible just to continue to sleep – I would.Â I hate facing the day.Â I drive home hurt and scared and angry every day.Â I fail as a wife, I fail at being what I feel I should at my job…I am a burden of misery to my best friend whom I ***** to every day.Â She moves to Germany soon and I know our friendship will fade away.Â Every day is the same.Â Most nights during the week I just cry myself to sleep.

PeopleÂ keep […]

6/14/2013 4 comments

Claustrophobia sets in

by lesley 4/1/2013

written by lesley

I really think I am a loser.

I’m almost 25, living in a tiny room in my parents’ place. I know they think I’m a drag and a burden. I should have worked harder in college and not gotten kicked out. I just didn’t give a damn about my classes and I should’ve just argued it out and changed majors, but I didn’t and I flunked a third time. Three strikes right?

XXX

Working part-time at a pretty thankless job, but they’re all thankless. The only full-time employees are managers, of which there are 5 as oppossed to 7 employees. That seems pretty out of whack to me.

I’m […]

4/1/2013 2 comments

I have no future, and I can’t care enough to do anything about it.

by Hyasha 1/30/2013

written by Hyasha

For as long as I can remember, I’ve found myself unable to care or put forth effort for anything. I don’t pursue friendly or romantic relationships, and I don’t have any work ethic for academics or finding any sort of job. I’m a quick learner, so I’ve mostly been able to coast through high school on tests alone, though I’m currently at severe risk of needing to repeat my senior year next year. Due to my lackluster academic record and the fact that my family is barely above the poverty line, I have no prospects for college whatsoever.

The thought of suicide crosses my mind every […]

1/30/2013 4 comments

Can’t change, won’t change? Not for much longer

by AllThingsMustPass 12/29/2012

written by AllThingsMustPass

I’ve tried turning my life round, but yet again I’ve failed. I keep trying to better myself but everything ends up being a false dawn of hope or another fuck up to add to the ever extending list. I’ve always been a bit melancholy but I love having a laugh. I want to be in love again but I can’t open up. People say that I sometimes come across as cocky or supremely confident, yet I’m actually shy and unsure of myself. I’m one huge contradiction. I can easily identify with those who say they wear a mask in front of others and hide what […]

12/29/2012 5 comments

My thoughts

by fallenone26 11/4/2012

written by fallenone26

I am 28. I have no future. I quit college 2 times because of depression and lack of money. I come from abusive family. My father had taken Â it out on me during almost all childhood. I’ve been depressed since adolescence. My dreams have fallen apart once I dropped out of university. I wanted to commit suicide but didn’t have enough courage. That was my only chance to get out of poverty and misery. I failed. I have failed so many times in my life… I have probably developed another mental issue after dropping out – ptsd. Each day. Â Thoughts about failing at school keeps […]

11/4/2012 1 comment

Going Coo Coo

by anthropophobia 9/22/2012

written by anthropophobia

I am 23 years old. Â I am a new to this forum. Â The reason I joined is because I feel relentlessly hopeless like all of you. Â I feel I no longer have an escape. Â I have burned all my previous ties with my family and friends, and I have not had a social life in over 2 years. In fact, I do not even leave the house anymore. Â I am alone, in debt, and miserably empty.

In High school I had an extremely fruitful social life. Â At the age of 18 I was slowly covered by a blanket of Â torturous anxiety. The anxiety is strictly social. […]

9/22/2012 4 comments

I’m in misery…

by fredso 6/16/2012

written by fredso

A few years ago, my business partner stole millions of dollars from me which forced the closing of the business that I spent my life building. Â Shortly thereafter, I turned to gambling out of desperation, and what little I had left after he stole the money has been consumed by it. Â It has destroyed my life, my family’s lives, and my career. Â I have stopped gambling, but the consequences have finally pushed me past my ability to cope with them. Â While I don’t necessarily want to die, I simply can’t deal with being asked literally 20 times or more per day for money that I […]

6/16/2012 1 comment

My depression

by theForgotten 6/14/2012

written by theForgotten

I’m depressed in really weird streaks.Â I’ll be to the point where I need to cut every freaking night and think about suicide for a while, and then it will let up for a short time, I still won’t be happy, but I won’t be cutting.Â It also always seems to strike worse in the night, thats when I usually really feel hopeless.

I don’t know why it changes.Â If I think about it, I always feel alone, with no prospects for meaningful friendships.Â I never get hopeful, just not depressed.Â Does this phenomenon happen to anyone else?

6/14/2012 4 comments

failure

by evanR 5/17/2012

written by evanR

I’m an Iraq vet, split with my wife over a year ago. I’ve failed at every job I’ve gotten since my discharge, ruined every friendship in my life, and have no prospects for the future. No artistic or creative talents, failing familial ties, and I am just tired all the time. I’m slowly researching different methods for ending my life. I know it would be great to stick arou d long enough to see my baby nephew grow up, but that would entail continuing to live, and I am an utter failure at all of the things that modern living entails. I have no desire […]

5/17/2012 1 comment

I lasted 2 weeks…

by CJMudd 5/7/2012

written by CJMudd

This small white oval looks stark on my kitchen table. It delicately sits there promising me so much. Pacifying me with prospects of sound sleep, resulting maybe in a gawping vacant stare and some dripping saliva. I feel cheated somehow. My years of toil, of experience, my scars dissolved by this little white oval. What am I if not the sum of my parts. Broken and strained they may be, but mine none the less. I toil over my toil and remain unresolved.

5/7/2012 0 comment

the Watcher

by the Guardian 5/5/2012

written by the Guardian

the Watcher

The woodsmen, on this day as any other, dragged his found logs from the forest, on a small cart, into the village. Winter was coming and like his father before him he would need to gather a lot of wood to fend off the coming cold. He patted his children on the head and headed back into the dark cool forest for another load of wood. Deeper and deeper he searched for trees that had fallen and split so that he may break them with his hands and fill his cart. Deadfall wood was getting hard to find, his need was great but his […]

5/5/2012 5 comments

When I’m Alone

by Pot 2/20/2012

written by Pot

I put my mask on when I go out, I put my mask on when I leave my room, when someone enters my room and when I have any form of human contact.

It’s when I’m alone when everything comes at once. The failures, the lack of prospects. The undeserved pain. When I’m alone I’m a different person.

2/20/2012 4 comments

question; please answer

by tphg 1/16/2012

written by tphg

if you have no one relying on you, then what’s so bad about killing yourself? I have family and friends, sure, but none of them needs me to live. I see friends every other week, try to see family less than that; I know I’m not necessary. I’m not necessary to any one other persons existence. People would be sad but so? Life is saddening.

No kids, no spouse or prospects of any kind, no pets, no car or mortgage and no hope.

If I continue living, I’ll just be seeking out ways to stay happy, like everybody else does. But nothing makes me happy, […]

1/16/2012 4 comments

Life can be cruel, damn cruel

by therealnickz 8/27/2009

written by therealnickz

I don’t know why I came to this website, other than to get all of my suicidal thoughts out.Â I have struggled with depression for a while, but lately I have felt more suicidal than depressed. I’m going to the local community college in my town. I can’t put this into words right now. Every day I’m there I feel these intense feelings come over me. I feel alone. I know I am alone, even though there are plenty of people around me. The sunshine doesn’t make me happy at all. In fact, it makes me angry and upset because the heat is so unbearable. I’m […]

8/27/2009 1 comment

just have to say it I guess

by betterlucknextime 7/16/2009

written by betterlucknextime

My relationship with my partner of 12 years has failed. Â I gave up my family and my culture to be with him in another country. Â Somehow, I have managed to end up with no job, no career, no money and no prospects, with a 4 yearold and a 2 yearold in my care. Â I have struggled with depression and the care of 2 kids while hubby kept going with his fancy career and now he wants the kids. I have nothing to offer – there is no money or recognition in being the mother of my children. Â All the court wants to know is how […]

7/16/2009 1 comment

chronic case

by dreamachine 4/3/2009

written by dreamachine

i’m suicidal all the time. it’s always on my mind. i’ve only made one “serious” attempt that got me in the hospital, but i’m scared of asking people for help and i’ve made dozens of mini-attempts (that no one knows about) or put myself in risky situations countless times. i just wish i could die already. i’m scared of what comes after death (i’m agnostic, i don’t have a particular belief because i don’t know.) but i’m scared of what living will bring me as well..

my story is not particularly abnormal or interesting. rejected by a drug abusing father, raped at 18, kicked out of […]

4/3/2009 5 comments

Just another day

by BarryB 3/26/2009

written by BarryB

It saddens me to see these young kids considering suicide as an option.Â You have a long time left to live and you’ve got rampant hormones.Â You need to ride it out and see what the future provides.

Sadly I have seen what the future provided and now that I’m 45, I’m not sure I want to continue.Â I’m going on my second divorce.Â I haven’t had a sex life in 20 years.Â I spent 10 of those years looking for the right woman and 10 of them married to the wrong woman.Â The prime of my life has passed me by and I got robbed.

The […]

3/26/2009 5 comments