I have had misophonia for over 30 years and psoriasis for nearly as long despite being prescribed immunosuppressants. As a result of arguments with a family member I have attempted to commit suicide twice by overdosing prescription drugs (beta-blockers and sleeping pills which shall remain nameless). On the second attempt late last year I was found by a doctor and taken to hospital where I narrowly avoided being sent to psychiatric hospital. Waking up in a hospital in a Fentanyl induced daze is a peculiar experience, especially being read the riot act for trying to take out my cannula.
As my misophonia and psoriasis are incurable […]
This story is 100% batshit nut TRUE STORY. and its pretty queer and peculiar but here it goes……I NEVER thought I would be so unhappy in life but I realized shit hit the fan in my life from the beginning ….
BOTH of my parents conceived me in the state mental hospital and I was born in 1988 and was adopted
I have been homeless for over 2 years since 2011. and I tried to commit suicide 4 times too. I suffered a lot of emotional torture from being a crossdressing punk rocker who was raised in a adopted close minded conservative home , that I moved out of in 2006. […]
I don’t really know where to start off. This is my first post so please don’t criticize me or anything.
Okay. So ever since I was a little kid, I mean little like 3, I’ve been terribly anxious. Anxious about anything and everything. And I don’t really have a reason, I just am. I’ve never really liked who I am, appearance, personality, etc. And in 5th grade I would constantly get made fun of and I just hated going to school. And then in 6th grade, I hated myself. I hated how I looked and I hated that other people were so much better.. So I […]
It has been 3 weeks ago since I had to leave the psychiatric hospital. In those 3 weeks a lot of things have changed. Everything is for me too stressful and I feel really stressed. I also feel really down, more suicidal and I don’t wanna do a single thing, there’s not a single spark of happiness in me. I even can’t handle school, and I’m doing only the half of my lessons. I really don’t know how to go further anymore. I’m fighting to get a better life for 10 years now, and it only gets worser and worser, so why should I anymore? […]
I few days ago I had a meeting with my doctor an psychiatrist, and my doctor was like: “Oh, and ofcourse next week thursday is your leaving date.” Just in middle of the conversation, and I was like: “What??!! O.o” because it wasn’t the plan, we would discuss about what next, staying longer in the psychiatric hospital or getting therapy, on next week tuesday, and he already made a discision, which he would not change clearly. They had the plan to send me home with no therapy, while I still need help, and I wrote a poem about it, because I waa really confused […]
Trying to kill myself was the best thing that couldâ€™ve happened. Because if I hadnâ€™t tried to and if I hadnâ€™t failed, I wouldnâ€™t feel the urge to change how I felt and I wouldnâ€™t have gone to Four Winds. It was tricky, I had just enough of the Nortatryptaline to go into coma but I just ended sleeping for a straight 48 hours. I then didnâ€™t leave my house for an entire week and was drinking so much, I decided physical pain would have been the answer to everything. I cut the word help into my arm and cried myself to sleep that night. […]
Every Summer since I was a teenager has been tough for many different reasons.
From being in hospital, to loosing someone to death, to drinking myself awake every morning.
This Summer is full of promise.
This Summer is probably going to be my most memorable Summer yet and maybe ever.
I have no money but so much hope and love that it could fill an entire city.
I’ve one small worry though. This might be the start of the end of me and my bestfriend.
I’ve known this girl Hayley for 13 years of my life and I’m 17 yet.
She is literally my soul mate.
This is my first time posting on here, and I would like to read some first hand accounts of hospitalization after a suicide attempt, or being hospitalized for threatening to do so. I would like to know whether you feel it helped you or made you feel worse. Were you diagnosed with a mental illness and do you still want to kill yourself?
Bought components for helium bag online last fallÂ (live in a small town so it was easier to find online). I suppose I was acting a little too disconnected from others and my boyfriend caught on before I could summon the courage to […]
In early 2009 I started dealing with severe recurrent depression, even though I was undiagnosed at the time. Â I’m sure many of you know what that feels like. Â I felt like my life had no point, none of my classes were interesting, I didn’t want to hang out with my friends, and I just hated everything and everyone, especially myself. Â All of these emotions just kept building up until I couldn’t deal with it anymore. Â In September of that year I tried to overdose on sleeping pills. Â I calculated what the lethal dose for someone my size would be, and took that plus a few […]
I’m new here, but I’ve been following this site for a few months now. I triedÂ committing suicide almost a year ago. I wasÂ hospitalized for about 3 days before going into a psychiatric hospital for a week. It scared the hell out of me. I promised myself I never wanted to end up there again. The only people that know about this are my parents and my sister I was too ashamed to tell my best friend or any other family members. I did actually tell one friend from online but she completely laughed at me. Told me I was such a wuss Â trying to commit […]
I must have been around 8 or 9 when my mother first brought me to a psychologist. I had to draw a tree and had to talk to the lady. Obviously I must have been depressed but I didn’t know the word for it. When I was 21 I did three suicide attempts over a 2 year period. The internet did not exist then and my method of trying to die humanely (sleeping pills – Lorametazepam to be exact) were not to succeed. Sleeping pills in combination with a bag: no use either. I was only left with the humilation of waking up in a […]
i tryin kill myself bout month ago…they save me and i was at the psychiatric hospital…but i still feel alone..i don’t have any family and friends here…tryin find love of my life,someone who loved me but nobody cares.i still think bout kill myself.cause thats only way to be happy
I’m currently stuck in hospital, not sure when ill be released but they’ve kept me in here for 3 months before. I can’t wait any longer to do this so I’m just going to do it in here. problem is I’m a wimp with pain so want to do it as painlessly as possible. Not to mention the lack of things I could use to CTB with. my plan is to use the exit bag with valium (diazapam).
My question is, how much diazapam do I need? I don’t want to puke just lose consciousness. I’m going to start hoarding it and think I can […]
So I was released yesterday from an 11 day stay at the 3rd hospital.. The first time I went was October 3rd-26th. This past time was November 3rd-14th. At the first hospital they put me on Prozac, Zyprexa, and Welbutrin. Hasn’t helped even the slightest.. I’m ready to just drink a bottle of vodka and slit my wrists. For the sake of my family, someone please convince me not to…
Some time this week, I was planning on cutting my arm really bad and then going to the nurse and counselor about it. What do you guys think would happen? Would they send me straight from school to a psychiatric hospital? Would they just call my parents and have them start taking me to a psychiatrist?
When I went to the nuthouse, I brought two books with me: Orhan Pamuk’sÂ SnowÂ and Gyorgy Konrad’sÂ Stonedial.Â The latter is the closest I will ever have to a bible; every time I’ve gone somewhere new, that book has come with me. After all, Dragoman wouldn’t have walked through the double doors of the psychiatric hospital with shoulders rounded, arms clenched, flinching at every touch and trying to make himself as small as possible so as not to be hurt; Dragoman would have walked in like he owned the place, grinned, cracked a joke… he would have treated their confiscating of his clothing as amusing and, if I’m […]
So, 2 weeks ago, I planned to kill myself on Monday. I sent my ex-counselor a goodbye e-mail on Sunday, but instead of killing myself, I ended up going to a Psychiatric hospital and stayed there for a week and a half. He sent me an e-mail on Monday and Tuesday, but I am no longer able to access the e-mails. I know I should tell him that I’m okay, and that I’ve been in a hospital, but I’m not sure if I’m going to stay alive. You see, I wanted to stay longer at the hospital, but the staff said I was ready to […]
I was sectioned into a room by myself. I was still wearing my bathrobe which they checked and found nothing Because i had been down this path before i had secretly stored some tablets in a secret compartment in my purse, when the attendees had left me alone at my unit. I knew how to get away with this. I wanted to use them to put me to sleep as i knew they would have prescribed half the medication dosage that i was used to.
This was not the first time i have been inside and spent days and nights in a psychiatric Hospital.
I just don’t understand how a depressed person could at first want to get better and eventually doesÂ startÂ to feel better but then wants to be depressed again. Or how a person wants to be in a psychiatric hospital again, for the third time. I’m very curios as to why I feel this way. I can only come up with two explanations but I’m not sure if they make sense. Well one is I think because I only know myself best when I’m depressed and that’s my “comfort” zone. And two is because at hospitals I get attention and I feel […]