My life has fallen to pieces. The details aren’t important. It’s all the same stuff that you read on this forum. That’s not even the reason I’m upset. My emotions are out of control. I can be fine one day, then spend the next day crying into my pillow. I’ve had it. I cut myself. I beat my face in with a mallet. I can’t stop fantasising about jumping off the roof of my house. And yes, I do have a suicide plan. I feel that God has abandoned me, and I don’t know where to turn. The only ray of hope right now […]
Tag:
Reason
I’m feeling so much right now that I am unable to express it. I’ve always been like this. Words cannot describe the feeling inside my soul. I still go on but I am also stuck.
I really see no reason to go on. I do but without reason and filled with nothing. Empty. I have trouble validating anything exists. If it exists then what is my reason for living? To work wearing women’s outfits though in my soul I am a male? To hide my true self …what’s left of it? I don’t want to be apart of a plan if there isn’t one. […]
I don’t want to make new friends nor meet my ‘other half’ .. I don’t want a job .. I don’t want to hang on to the idea this world can be a better place .. I don’t even want happiness .. I don’t want any reason to be tied to this world
All I want is OUT .. Why are we conditioned, encouraged to believe life is -that- valuable? I’m also tired of hearing: suicide is never the answer .. If you were to kill yourself, people who care about you would be crushed, devastated etc
Well, I don’t think I’m that responsible for anyone well-being […]
You know how everybody says †God put you on earth for a reason†Well … . . I truly believe that “God†put me here by accendent, and hopefully he realizes his mistake and takes me back. Sure It’s been fourteen years and one month that i’ve been on this planet. But i’d happly give my life away to be anywhere eles, just not alive. But the thing is I don’t believe in this guy named “God†I don’t believe in the “Bible†ethier. I doubt that a man had magical powers and; created nature, created people, created food, created everything on earth and […]
“What hurts when I remember this song is remembering how someone you love doesn’t love you back, aond you feel like it’s the end of the world. Little did I know that when the sun rises, a whole new beginning was looking at me, waiting for me. That beginning will always remembers you and returns when the sun sets. And when the going gets rough, the sun will be there for you until it sets. So in short words there is no end. Just a new beginning. ”
I feel like I haven’t written anything on here in awhile. Anyways, I’ve realized that sometimes life has […]
I’m new to this so I don’t really know how to explain what I’m feeling but I need to get this out. My girlfriend left me 2 weeks ago and she was the reason I did anything with my life. She is the one it’s as simple as that and I would do anything to get her back. I’m a manic depressive anyway and I’ve been on pills for the last 6 years with no results. I have been seeing shrinks for the last 5 years and ended up in hospital 3 times trying to kill myself. I cannot deal with this anymore I’m 22 […]
I’m probably being stupid, I keep thinking that the only reason that I should continue living is so that my family don’t end up hurt but I’m starting to question my theory. I found my release a week or so ago, cutting, it helped me a bit. Whenever I got shouted at for poor conduct at school or something, I’d concentrate on the pain and everything else would just go silent no matter HOW hard they scream at me, I just wouldn’t hear it. It’s become a routine, planning out and researching how to end my pathetic existence that can’t even affect society, if I […]
There’s too much in my head. I have too many thoughts too many opinions. I just want it all to go away. I can barely tell my dreams from reality anymore so I stopped sleeping. I’ve attempted suicide 3 times. I’ve passed out during two of them and later woke to survive it. When I was out I just remembered feeling nothing. It was peaceful and quiet. The only reason I feel I haven’t succeeded is because I would hate to leave any sort of burden on someone. I want to go, I want to leave it all behind but if my passing causes someone else to […]
Amy, its been 3 years since your passing and I want to leave you a message but never knew where without being ridiculed and questioned whether or not I’m not ok. I was thinking of the day we me so young and carefree I was hopeless and depressed when you met me. That changed so quickly I suddenly had purpose for everything I had a reason to like myself and to like the world around me. I still have your glasses from freshman year safely perched next to the last picture of us, the last time I didn’t fake my smile, the last time […]
In 8th grade, I was 13, I was 5’5″, and I was 125lbs. I was teased for eating too much and being overweight, when in reality I knew I wasn’t. I knew at the beginning anyway. I’d been bullied my entire life, and I could shake this off easily.
For a while.
My eyes were convinced first. When I looked in the mirror, I saw a fat girl. An ugly girl. When I looked down at my stomach, I always sucked it in for about an hour afterwords.
My mind followed suit. I thought I was fat. I looked at every meal I ate and started trying to leave some every […]
ugh i need advise can you guys plz read this and tell me what i should do about it
by gen19
written by gen19
I haven been here in sometime, mostly because i found and amazing guys who gives me a reason to live and fights for me at moments when i feel like giving up. But as you guys know it life cant be great for people like us things always get screwed up for us. My mom hates my boyfriend and has gone to the extend of telling me that i have to pick between her or my boyfriend and if i see my boyfriend again i would stop being her daughter and that i might as well just kill her because thats what im doing by […]
I wish I had an interesting story but I don’t. I just want to die.
by SuicideBoy
written by SuicideBoy
I read all of your stories here, and I feel sad, angry at the world, frustrated and at times soothed. I think of my own story and feel nothing.
I don’t have a story, just the pain that comes with it. I grew up in a normal family, had normal friends, got normal grades and, for the most part, was normal. But as far back as I can remember I’ve wanted to die. The thought consumes me.
My first close call happened when I was 15 and in the school play. I screwed up horribly, and after the show I went to an old bridge and sat […]
I just don’t know what to do anymore. I do have a sense of relief right now, since I found this page. And I know it seems stupid that something as simple as stumbling across a website can give me any relief from the way I feel right now, but I’ll take what I can get. I feel like things couldn’t possibly be any worse, but I know thats not true at all, because they have been worse before. I suppose it is a bit comforting to be able to get this off my chest without having the repercussions that telling an actual person can […]
I do not believe that I will live to see the next year. I have no exact date yet to fulfill my plan, but I do not believe that I can carry on much long. I still have many things to do, to make things as painless as possible for my dearest ones. There so much to do, but in the end I’ll be at peace.
For years I’ve been handling this feelings, but nowadays I mostly feel emptiness. I’ve been tired too long to carry on anymore for long, and I’m sorry for that. I’m just too tired and empty. I just hope that they […]
Hi all,
I wasn’t around for a while but i am still not ok at all. My problem is that I can’t enjoy my life. I just started crying without any reason. I know, that it would be good to do something like going swimming, or jogging or something else. But I am feeling so down I can barely start anything. Today there is a really huge city-party, where thousands of people are going. But I keep telling myself, that I won’t go there alone, because everytime I went in the public alone, I started feeling even more lonely. Unfortunately I dont have someone to go […]
the reason i have been a total jerk on here is cause of my family my parents think my brother and sister are golden children and im the retarded runt of the litter. whenever i do something right its the wrong way to do it.but when my siblings do something wrong like smoke weed its all okay.but with me they act like im a disgusting thing that they wish wasnt theres.
“Step one you say we need to talk,
he walks, you say sit down it’s just a talk,
He smiles politely back at you,
You stare politely right on through”
If only they would listen…
If only I could go back in time, to that night. Cherry. She jumped off the roof of a hospital. She drank until she found courage to swallow those pills. Called the cops on herself. That is what amazes me the most. Why had she called the cops? Why? If she was just going to go and jump off that building? I just want to go back in time, know […]
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m a 15 year old boy, a straight A student who just finished freshman year at a relatively good school. I am a decent track and cross country athlete, and my family loves me very much. Yet, I still constantly feel alone and useless.
I don’t quite understand people. I see people I know having fun, hanging out, and I don’t know, I can’t seem to find myself normal friends. There are plenty of people I talk to (about once a week each, about serious shit usually). I don’t know how “suicide attempt” is defined on this site, but […]
All my life no one has really had high hopes for me. No one has ever motivated me into doing anything. Only my oldest sister has went to college and she still can’t find a job. My mom tells me there is no point in going to college in today’s time. Â Me I don’t care what my future holds. There is no future only a present. I get pissed off when I get treated like shit cause I have worked my ass off in school without ANY motivation to keep me going. I have done it all on my own. I decide always to work […]
out of all fucking people, why did i have to fall inlove with my best friend?! we used to have a “thing” she used to like me. but she said she doesnt wanna lose our friendship because im her best friend. everyone i know can just tell im in love with her. and i hate admitting. i told her once when i went out of the city for a week and i told her i said that cos i missed her so much. i always look her in the eyes and say im not in love with her, but in realaty i think she is […]