I Don’t Want To Do It Anymore

There’s too much in my head. I have too many thoughts too many opinions. I just want it all to go away. I can barely tell my dreams from reality anymore so I stopped sleeping. I’ve attempted suicide 3 times. I’ve passed out during two of them and later woke to survive it. When I was out I just remembered feeling nothing. It was peaceful and quiet. The only reason I feel I haven’t succeeded is because I would hate to leave any sort of burden on someone. I want to go, I want to leave it all behind but if my passing causes someone else to feel pain its not worth it to me. I don’t know how much longer I can take of just feeling like this worthless blob of nothing, like a waste of space, like a poor excuse of a human being. I feel nothing but confusion and mixed emotions. I just want everything to go away.