The title says it all. I can’t please anyone, no one really loves me, no one cares. I’m just a selfish, worthless piece of shit of a bastard with no brain. I also must pretend to be someone I’m not and it’s pure torture. I’ve been bullied and due to my chronic stress, the bullying I used to ignore is now haunting me, taunting me. I lock my feelings deep down and hide it with a smile but I’m so dead inside. Now I am considered mute and heartless. Yes, I don’t know how to love anymore. Therefore I do not deserve to live another moment, […]
first off, i just want to say that this may be provoking. sorry.
i have brunt myself, i have severly bruised myself, i have aerosol bruised myself. but i havent cut in over 3 months.
i used to be almost happy about my cuts. sometimes i would look in the mirror and smile at my pale thighs covered in red slashes , but other times i would stay up for hours at night crying into my pillow wishing they would dissapear. now im neither. the scars are starting to fade, but i know that i will have a constant reminder of my type of addiction
it feel like […]
I have lost the will to live it takes alot to make me smile and hardly anything to upset me. I have no energy anymore have lost intrest in my favirote things. I first started starveing myself around age 16 because i always felt fat, ugly and stupid comared to everyone eles. Ill go a couple days without eating then give in and consume a sick amount of food only to feel horrible afterwards. Food is an enemy i regret every meal i eat.
Self hatred has caused me to cut myself which turned into an everyday vice. Iv developed a blood lust waiting and […]
my friend took his own life on march 18, 2013. he gambled with his own life as he spun the cylinder to his prized .45 revolver, looked dead into his best friend’s eyes and pulled the trigger… he had a 1 in 6 chance of death and he took that- he left no warnings before hand… i dont think he thought it would go off… Â but it did… and now he’s gone…….. he thought he had no one but his best friend- and even then, he knew he was gonna move in with his girlfriend and Robert would be homeless and living in his […]
Every day, when I wake up, panic surges though me. Hurry, I think. Don’t let yourself become totally awake. Hurry! Go back to sleep.
I used to think that a little extra sleep would help. And, I guess it used to. It doesn’t anymore. Less and less do I want to awaken.
I smile at these little things that no one knows about.
I smile in sorrow.
Myself and I we share this barely beating heart of hurt and when the hurt come there’s an argument a fight to save a smile a small attack on human tears to dry them for a while.
For the past four years I have sporadically found myself glancing at the final option, and for the last four years I have always immediately retreated from the idea, felt I was foolish to even have considered it. Last week I woke up and took a long look at it. Might not so be terrible. No more collecting shattered expectations. No more painting on a smile. No more cursing the God who created me. It’s starting to sound rather pleasant. Nothingness, not even silence. It would be nice.
Hi everyone,
I’ve read most of your stories, and they’ve made me quiver. Your life should never be thought as negative. You were put on this earth for a reason. If you say you’re not loved, you’re wrong. So many people have the biggest hearts and would love to get to know you if you allowe yourself to open up. I know you have been hurt by someone in the past that allows you to put a wall up, but being vulnerable is a beautiful thing. It allows you to feel something, rather than nothing. Even if it feels like you’re not worth something, you are worth […]
I think it’s about time. There are people I love and were talking to – I wanted to talk to – but not anymore. I have nothing more to say.
My therapist called the police on me today. Rather than talk with me about whatever the fuck she thought they would do she just sends them over. I was shaking. Did she think I would tell them? Did she think they could do something? What? Nothing unless I would have said I was going to kill myself. They asked if I just wanted attention. That sounded good so, yeah, sure. If it would get […]
She talks to angels, they call her out by her name.
She paints her eyes as black as night
She pulls those shades down tight
There’s a smile when the pain comes.
The pain gonna make everything alright.
She Talks to Angels they all call her by her name……..
I hate who I am. I don’t have reason or cause to, except for, I am me. I don’t like it one bit. If there were a chance I could, just for one day, cease to exist, i’d grasp that chance tight and will it to come true. Forget trying to remember how I’m supposed to smile, how i’m supposed to laugh, how i’m supposed to look, how i’m supposed to be. and for a moment, I’ll close my eyes, and cease to exist. For a moment, I’ll be happy, for a moment I’ll be glad to be me. But this is reality, a place […]
Secretly it hurts… it hurts so bad i feel like ill break down… should I be with someone I crush on or had been with and trust… depression or lies… who what… make it all stop, Jason make it all stop i need you… Take me away and with that my memory, oh please it hurts im the marionette of a whore… secretly it hurts and id rather scream than smile.. mommy saw my scars.. bubby is so sad because Im not sure if i want him… the sub yelled at me all day.. give up because you cant be a string player… no no […]
Hello everyone ! I’m doing this project i call ‘Tell me your story’. I did a facebook page & a blogspot. But I need YOUR help to make this work.I want to provide a way for everyone to interact with each other. This is how it works. You tell me your story, I tell everyone else. You could be known or stay on anon. It’s all up to you. What matters is that your story will be heard. People will know that you exist. You will leave a trace that you once existed. You will help other not do the same mistakes you did or […]
In a happy mood feeling like the cookie monster and laughing and smile ….i guess here i am dont watch the hair please me and it was fighting 🙂
I wish you ppl wouldn’t talk about dying. Stop pls.  So sad, I’m just like u and i don’t want death. pls think about before you’re gone. Love u all. smile ^^ pls.
death is the best way out and the only way. I want to die so much, you dont understand because no one does. Ive told people but they think its a joke. I see it in their face, that smile, that smirk. Its just a joke……
But im afraid to kill, to kill myself. I cant do it and i try. I think about the multiple ways and i cry because I can’t do it.
The only one that could keep me alive… she lost her fight helping me live through mine.
The only one that could make me smile… he left me for the normals.
The only ones that could keep away my pain… they moved and left me here.
The only one that could hear my cries… she laughed and call me attention seeker.
The only one I trusted… he told all my secrets and told me it was my own fault and walked away.
Why do I even try?
Why won’t I just die?
Why can’t I just end the pain… everytime I’m reminded of you and I know that you’d want me to keep trying,
Why did you leave me?
Why did […]
He broke up with me.
The only person that cared about me.
I love him so much, and all he could say that he didn’t feel the same.
I didn’t make him happy and all that kept him to stay was guilt.
I give him my virginity, my dreams, my trust.
He doesn’t even care you see?
1 year and a half what is it to him, nothing, a burden.
Days pass by and all I see is your smile.
“Leave me alone.”
All I can do is watch how you fade away out of my life.
How can I forget everything […]
I was just going through my old pictures when I stumbled across my pictures from 2009 summer pictures. I didn’t think anything of it until I found the pictures of my friends. We spent basically the whole summer together. It made my chest hurt, just seeing my smile and all of my friends together. We haven’t really been like that since our friend Andrew killed himself.
We had our little “gang.” four girls, four guys. There was me, Kelsey, Anna, Shiney(real name), Max, Henry, Andrew, and Toby.
We were always happy and having fun. Then, when Andrew killed himself last June, it was like a piece was […]
For a while now (for as long as I can remember; 2-4 weeks.), I’ve been okay with the fact of dying. Being in the hospital a couple weeks back, I was on blood thinners and I started to bleed. Badly. Like “oh my god, I need a doctor in here!†and they needed to clean my sheets immediately. I bet they always clean sheets immediately, but I’m still saying. And most of the time I felt the liquid drip down onto my chest (my arm was on my chest when it started to bleed), I didn’t moan to my mom to get a nurse. […]