Once again, i find myself feeling depressed. I thought I might list down my probles here:
Everyone I ever meet instanly calls me gay, sometimes even before I’ve said a word to them.
My parents often make out like im the worst child they could ever have, which I dont think I am.
I have no friends at my new school, and my good friends from my old school are replacing me.
So there you have it. Like I said in my first post, i really feel like im just Gods trash. I feel like an accident, a mistake. There is absolutely nothing good about […]
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So I heared ketamin works pretty well… I can imagine MDMA will also be amazing, but I’d like to get some more information. I’ve done MDMA.not as antidepressant but as party drug. The plus side of MDMA is the way you feel… loved, one, amazing and on top of the world, for three days. The down side is: your memory gets fucked up, you need to take vitamin c too protect the brain and after 3 days you get this huge downwards spiral… It was probably the worst in my life.
So I have 2 questions for you;
1. What kind of antipressents/SSRI/drugs do you use for […]
I have always seen life as a quest. It works like a game plan. Every level gets tougher and the monsters and hurdles get more and more dangerous and difficult to cross. I don’t regret having my life but all I wish is to have someone who I can share it with. I did fall in love and then ended up with a crushed heart when the relationship ended. Occupying yourself definitely helps but the loneliness remains. I have plenty of friends but I miss the existence of the special one. Work can substitute thoughts but not feelings. I don’t know what I feel about […]
I am full out screaming on the inside as my life feels so out of control.
My life should be more even keeled than it is and I am so fed up with trying to keep my balance and do the right thing all of the time. I know I could just go to bed but it is better to dump this poisonous mood on here and get it out of my physical body. I want to have what I believe is a better place to live, in a better area and the thought behind that is that if I am […]
I feel like a stranger in my own, even though i have my stuff all through the house, i still don’t feel like i live in this place. It makes me feel even more depressed then i am. I wish there was someway to make myself feel like this is my home as well but i don’t think that will ever happen unless i live by myself or with my boyfriend instead of a youth organisation where we share a unit of the same sex. Maybe it’s because i have OCD, that makes me feel this way but i don’t know. I just wish things […]
About a week ago I found out how fucked up my family is, my mums an actress so she goes on tours alot and my dad is a psychotherapist who has been trying to get his quilification for 11 years!
My dad is a lazy alchoholic but he dosent hit me, but he manipulates my emotions until i’m crying in your room for an hour or 4. My mum hates him because she has payed about 250,000 punds on his training so we’re broke. My brother ignores it by doing working and other activities. My dad is very….. destructive, of people and my stuff. He has […]
I have a hard time talking about this stuff but i just dont know anymore about anything one second I’m happy and ok and most of the time i just dont know what to think its weird, i dont know what to think anymore I go to the gym to help my confidence and it seems the harder i go the harder i am on my self , I feel i made the wrong decisions in life im not getting anywhere with life i feel like im at a stand still, i hate every choice i have made noone knows i feel This way and […]
I hope everything is alright with you (whoever is reading this), or at least I hope things will improve for you at some point in time, hopefully soon.
I’ll try and keep this relatively short so I don’t take up too much of your time if you choose to read this. Also, I’ll understand if I don’t get any comments on this because I know the stuff posted on this website is usually hard to respond to. That and I usually just write random crap that doesn’t really make sense to anyone. This probably won’t flow very well, and for that I apologise. I find it […]
Ok, I’m going to work now, when you wake up this morning, please read my diary. Look through my things and figure me out.
alicedecristales.blogspot.com
Sorry because of the language stuff, but I’m not so smart. A desperate attempt to talk.
Hello. I recently just signed up .
My problem isn’t as severe as others, but this seems like a place to share stuff.
So . I made friends, but they never notice me. I try to say hi to them, but they usually  just walk on by. No ever says hi to me. They don’t even notice me.
Sometimes I would walk with people and they would be like,”Sorry, I forgot your name.” And its been a year since I known them. Even some teachers do that.
I happened to make friend with this popular girl, and she invited me to her group’s mall. Me, having no life, was absolutely thrilled and said […]
Have I told you my favorite word is Halcyon? I hope tomorrow is a Halcyon day.
by jjgirl13
written by jjgirl13
I’ve set my date. It’s tomorrow.
I’ve set it so many times before. I keep putting it off. Dragging my feet. But life isn’t looking like sparkles anytime soon. Well, not life in general. Just me. Life could be sparkles. I don’t think I can see it again though. I’ve lost the art of experiencing joy. There’s no point not living; existing and living are two different things, and I can’t bear the former. Can’t walk the edge of the knife forever. Have to choose a side at some point.
When I look out the window, it’s fall. Fall is my favorite season. The air is crisp, and I […]
So many nice people here. Sympathetic and caring. Everyone here has obviously gone through their own hell. But does me posting something here affect anything? Honestly… everyone here posts about their problems, then instantly there are comments of encouragement… I honestly don’t need some empty words from someone who doesn’t even know me. All you will do is say “aww thats too bad blah blah blah” then move on to the next life story and say simliar shit. Like my suicide will be your sick source of entertainment for a few minutes. Am I expected to not think about how your attention is divided between […]
well, hi my name is Pia and i’m 14. It’s my first time that I write down .. my “stuff”. Â so I will just start how everything began.
i started first time cutting myself in 2009 i think, i wasn’t that long ago that my grandpa died. my mom changed, or i changed. i dont know. anyways my mom and me got big stress, i told her the first time that i hate her and i got the first time the feeling that i don’t belong here. I cut myself the first time.Â
From now on, i cut myself everytime when i got problems. When i cried […]
I just discovered this website and reading some of ya’ll’s posts called out to me and made me want to write stuff down. So why not do it for you people, someone who gets what im going through.
In less than 2 months I’ll be 22 years old. I’ve been thinking about suicide since i was 12. Depression and anxiety have been a part of my life since I was a baby. I remember being 4 or 5 years old, and feeling anxious and unsafe all the time. I grew up in a home where fighting, co-dependency, depression and hysteria was considered normal so I didn’t […]
So since I moved back in with my mom, she said I can’t go anywhere on the weekends and that I have to help her by babysitting, all weekend, and she’s not even going to pay me. And she went through my stuff while I was at school and she found my razors & pills, and she threw them all away. I’m beyond pissed off. I just want to sleep, and get high.
I don’t understand why some ex’s gives you closure and some do not. Why is that?
by sleepxdeath
written by sleepxdeath
Like with my ex boyfriend, I broke up with him a few years ago, from a 2 year long distance relationship and we decided to stay as friends. When I moved back to the same area I realized that he would always ignore me when I really wanted to at least see him… but I realized, after a few months, it was already too late. Nothing, no more hopes and no more dreams. And worse of all his parents told me to just move on. His friends, whom used to be mine, they just told me to move on as well.
Not him though. He just […]
I just don’t see the point of staying here anymore… but at the same time I know I will probably be alright after letting some stuff off my chest. I don’t expect anyone to care though, because lets face it, that’s life for you…
CPC
MY LIFE IS WICKED ALL MY LIFE I’VE NEVER HAD NOBODY TO TALK TO I ALWAYS KEEPED MY STUFF TO ME. ”I ALWAYS SAID ME MY SELFÂ AND I” SO SOMETIMES I THINK ABOUT KILLING MY SELF WHY? BECAUSE AM SELFCONSIOUS AM ALWAYS THINKING AM UGLY I HATE MY BODY AM 21 YEARS OLD AM 5’FEET I WEIGHÂ 85 POUNDS I CANT GET OVER THE IDEA I WEIGH THE MUCH THE FACT THAT I C GIRLS MY AGE AND THEY LOOK LIKE WOMAN I LOOK LIKE A DAMMN 14 YEAR LD GIRL PPL DONT TAKE ME SERIOUS. I MEAN COME ON SOMETIMES THEY SAY TOÂ MEÂ ‘HONEY IS YOUR […]
I can’t complain too much about my life. Both my parents love me, though sometime I find myself thinking it’s because they have to. I have a little sister and an older brother. Things I have to complain about are typical in our now a day system.
I’ll start with my siblings.
My little sister is a princess at heart but a complete wannabe to the darker side of life. She loves shopping for clothes and toys alike. Though fakes being bored. She loves the colors pink and purple and does her best to hide it. We all know how good little kids are at hiding things. […]