I don’t quite understand why it feels so much easier to write about my problems then to say them out loud I suppose it’s like my thoughts are my own little secret I mean that’s what your mind is for right? A space where you can detach yourself from reality if only for a few moments and go somewhere.. be it a memory or completely make up.. But no amount of day dreaming will save me from myself, Let me start off by saying I am now 19 years old to be 20 in August and have suffered from clinical depression for 4 years, I […]
Tag:
Suicide
i’ve just taken 10 aleves and i’m finishing up my note before i take any more. hopefully tonight will work
I am young, (13 almost 14) and I know I should be weird with my emotions. I have suicidal thoughts all of the time. I cry for no reason, suffer from insomnia, and have constant headaches with no medical reasoning. I’ve taken tests online, searched up the symptoms of depression, and all that stuff, and I am sure that I have it. I was okay until I broke my ankle (like a month ago, still have the cast today) where I got a lot worse. Now I just want to die, no matter what. I’ve been so close to trying to drown myself, and while […]
Doctors tend to ask if you are suicidal. I’m not. I accepted a while ago that I could not bring myself to do anything that intentionally hurt the people I love. Since I first wrote this sentence down, a close friend of mine took his own life. Before this, I had begun to feel increasingly like my desire not to be here anymore was beginning to outweigh my desire not to break my family’s hearts. Because, much as I don’t see the appeal, I have to admit that it would. I struggled, in the wake of my friend’s suicide, to understand how I felt about […]
I’ve been suicidal most of my life, delayed because many people gave me false hope (e.g. “Things will get better,” “It’s a temporary problem,” “Life has intrinsic value,” etc.). When do we stop and look, only to find flipping burgers is unfulfilling – when does a man breakdown from the socially approved unfeeling zombified state into tears and try to escape the mediocrity? The answer is when all hope is lost. Death > Life. I once feared the great abyss that awaits us all, but it now gives me solace and peace – not having to grind through each day, day after […]
I have to ask… am I an ideal suicide candidate? My family life has all but gone to shit (and trust me, I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING to change that around); I have a job that makes me miserable and I’ve had enough jobs to know it’s not getting any better out there. I can’t afford school ( I’m 22) and I don’t know where I want to see myself career-wise. I hate the way I look, despite compliments, which seem more like desperate attempts from friends to raise my self-esteem or from guys to get in my pants. I could go on… I’m serious about […]
I’m really sorry I made this so long but if anyone can read and respond I’d be very grateful.
When I was in 3rd grade, I transferred out of my elementary school and went to a different one. However, when I got to the new school, I was always bullied. I don’t know why, but people just never seemed to like me. I would sometimes get beat up and kicked around at recess. I remember one particular day when they lured me behind a tree in 4th grade and 3 guys beat the hell out of me. Sure, my parents went and talked to the teachers […]
Ive had a vedy fucked up two years.. i already prepare for death.. i sled off the road lastnight.. and for 5 seconds i just new i was going to hit a tree and die.. my point is.. i wasnt scared.. i was ready and hoping.. when i relised after hydroplaning at 80 miles an hour sideways then in to a large field.. it being dark i couldnt see anything.. then sliding at about 60 miles an hour into the grassy side median.. im very suprised i only had 3 flat tires.. i landed 3 feet from the tree sideline.. damn how i wish in […]
Lots of things had happened and all they turned me into stupid depressed teenager. I used to cope with the problems and I was fine, but now things are worse. Nothing can make me happy. I have only one real friend but although he tries to make me happier, he can’t. The others laugh at me, tell me I’m fat, stupid, ugly, idiot, etc. My family doesn’t understand me. They thing I’m ok, but I’m not. I just can cope with all my problems. I tried to stop self-harming, but I couldn’t. I didn’t eat for days, but I got ill and it didn’t help. […]
so back in october i made my first attempt and obviously failed but about a month ago i made plans for my second and now that’s in about 2 weeks. i feel really sick to say this but i’m excited. i’m sick and tired of this bullshit feeling and the only thing that gets me through the day is thinking “in a little bit it will all be over, you’ll be free” i know i should be thinking of everyone i’m going to leave but i’m so tired of living and being here that i could care less.
I haven’t told anyone this just because it’s hard for me, and no one has really cared to ask but it’s okay. I’m only posting this here because we’re all alike and we don’t judge each other.
I never really have been a kid with friends, not until this year. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t because I was antisocial. I was and still am the exact opposite. always making people laugh, smiling, and talking to people, but other than that, I was pretty much always ignored, and I was “the girl who most people like but doesn’t have any friends.” And let me tell […]
So I have been fighting the urge to kill myself off and on for about 15 years now. Sometimes I lost and attempted suicide. So far I have tried twice, once when I was uncertain so it was a far cry from a real attempt, and once when I would have died had my neighbour not have found me. Problem is, I really do want to die but I don’t want to kill myself. I keep praying not to wake up and find myself full of rage when I wake up in the morning. I am so angry and depressed. I feel stuck, literally, we […]
okay this has nothing to do with suicide i just need to get this out you don’t have to read if ya don’t want to.
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So my bff likes this guy and he’s amazing he’s taller than me (I’m 5’9 in the seventh grade) and he loves all the music I do, he connects with me, and we never get bored of eachother when we talk… it’s clear that i like him too. and I realllllyyy really like him, and I think he likes me (he always stares at me and smiles when I come and talk to him and smiles whenever he sees […]
no matter how hard i try to succeed i ALWAYS fail. I revise solidly then when the grades come up? FAIL making me slip into suicide thoughts deeper…what if i just ended my life..how easy would it be ? death…although they say death is easy..that seems a pretty good way to go in contrast to this tough life- never ending cycle of hardwork and disappointment compared to being forever asleep..no pain..no tears.
Over the years of my life people have trusted me with their secrets. Their own stories. Just holding them can put stress on a person, so I decided to share them with whoever is willing to read. I will not use names nor describe the physival apearance of that person.
First, a friend of mine had told me that her mother had been raped during the summer of 2012. She told me it was by someone very close and she is still going to therapy. Although she is recovering from the whole experience, she is making progress. She was not afraid of speaking up (which is […]
Same old boring bad background like everyone else:
-My sister died when I was younger, and I still feel like it was my fault that she died.
-My parents split
-Living in poverty since then
– Haven’t lived in the same house for over a year in like 6 years, Â eviction has met us more than once
-Don’t have anyone to trust
This year was the first time I really started to think about suicide seriously.  I was talking to the school psychologist about it and all she did was question me, “Do you have a plan?”, “What steps would you take?”.  Then she made me call a hotline and I for […]
The girl that’s been my bestfriend for 4 years is now talking to my rapist. She’s the one that told me he could burn in hell…and now they’re talking. I don’t even think I can begin to explain how I feel. I feel betrayed…I feel like I can’t have any friends. Her and another girl were pretty much the only people I trusted..now she’s talking to him and the other one is talking to the guy that calls me awful names.
Where’s my justice…where’s my hope.
Where the fuck is karma?
Hello everyone. If your reading this, Â then I assure you that right now I had forgotten this post. I wish not to remember my past, they had been changing me, transforming me, shapeshifting me, into such evil ways. I’m not evil myself, or at least I don’t want to be, but it’s come to a point now that I’ve become a whole different person from the experience I’ve been facing.
Although suicide is an option for me, I’m not planning to do such a thing so far. However, I do admire its benefits if I do take its path. But that brings a question, what does […]
So… you tried to comit suicide? you also decided to join a site and talk about it.
why? not why to commiting suicide but why to joining a site to talk about it?
is that not detrimental to your health? seriously. think about it for just one second.
secondly. STOP APOLOGIZING! stop apologizing for things OTHER people did to you! STOP the negativity. STOP. JUST STOP.
There are so many other things to do with your life than this. get out of the house off of the internet and improve your life. surround yourself with HAPPY and POSITIVE people. dont blame yourself because of things others did or said […]
My home situation have been very tough. As little girl I had every lie through at home. My mom has/had a relationship with an other man. My dad does everything at home cooking, laundry, bringing me and my 2 brothers to bed and school etc. My mom never does that and never gives us love. And my dad doesn’t too, he just does the standard stuff. She denies that she has a relationship with the other man. They are just friends she says. I just saw the man a couple months ago for the first time (never want to again). But people have seen them […]