You know, I honestly think of ways to die every single day.. Ive come up with probably hundreds of ways and thought of olaces no one would find me.. I cant do it because I have little lives to take care of and if I dont, they will have no one… My husband literally just left me.. Like an hour ago.. He called to tell the kods he loved them..which is great.. He is a good guy.. I am at a loss for words other than when will it end? :'(
Tag:
think
my parents have done so much for me
yet im failing all my subjects and im fat and i just feel so much burden. Everytime i think about one bad result, everything come crashing down and i think about my future and then dying and then i just wish somebody would kill me.
someone please kill me, ill pay you.
If I could do it and not hurt her, I think I would be gone. I wish I could do it and her not think it’s her fault. I wish she knew that I did it because I am the worthless one who is trying to save her from anymore pain. She is my sunshine. With out her my world is very dark.
I’m going to draw a picture
A picture with a twist
But instead of a pen and paper
I’ll use a razor and my wrist
The razor digs in slowly
The line begins to bleed
My wrists are getting bloody
This is the picture that I need
My fingers are getting shaky
I’m finding it hard to think
My throat is getting tight and hoarse
The tears are coming when I blink
I can hear my kitten purring
He’s scratching at the door
My little sister opens it
And finds me laying on the floor
She screams and shouts out “Mommyâ€
My mom’s now running […]
this is part of my exposition  do you think what i have written sounds alright this is about suicide for my SACE subject……..
Thirdly feeling like you have nothing good in your life left. Even if the statement isn’t true and you can see the good in there life they cant the bad has over ran it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NfnXdXpjL0
This song constantly makes me think about my ex, it breaks my heart but in the comforting relatable way where you hate yourself but you know someone else feels the same too.
“Goodbyes
And the Autumn night when we realised
We were falling out of love
But we never did.”
seriously this life is killing me ,
so hurt that i cant sleep…
they took everything
Slow down, i can’t keep up
while your waiting here
for me
saveme,save me
i can see you,
u think your gone
but your visible and so dark
Some one will Find me
Im waiting my hand are numb it raining, am i done?
Impatient ,can i go now ?
lett me leave
in love with life thats beyond me
I am laying in bed crippled by fear. There is nothing that can stop my brain from reminding me that I have something new coming up, something new to be afraid of. Why do I always feel like this? Scared, anxious… Hopeless.
Thoughts of “what ifs” and “what will happen” haunt my everyday movements. I can’t get out of bed, I won’t. It is just to hard. I am safe here, happy if I don’t let myself think.
Every little thing is hard.. If I shower, go to the shop, go for a stroll into town, will I get a panic attack? What if I do and I […]
i shouldnt ask this retorical question…. Â but would you be mad if i killed myself?
to be honest, i think im ready. Â nothing more will come of my life. Â i wont ever be happy, ive realised…. Â so the is no point…
my goals just keep going to shit and i decide on something lesser… Â to the point where i dont with to be happy anymore, i just wished to end the fruitless pursuit of happyness…. Â and now… Â i wish i can end this…
i cant do this anymore and im sorry if i dissapoint you… Â sorry if im wasting my voice or whatever you think it is that […]
I don’t know how many times I’ve started to type. “H-E-“, No! Stop! People have their own problems and worries. Why should they stop to help me? Would I stop to help me? I don’t know how many times I’ve heard my inner voice scream with the intensity of a million suns. Many people read this post and think, “Oh, it’s just another chick asking for attention.” I honestly wish that were the case.
The darkness is getting darker, and the sun has faded away. I no longer see light, just softer grey’s. My hope has flown away with birds. I’ve cut communication. I can no […]
To all of the ass holes, the miscreants and the filth out there sounding the earth I’m done, I don’t need to be hear anymore. You along with many other things have pushed me to the edge then when I’m grasping on to the cliff for dear life you stomp on my hands, I hqve things to tell you before I am gone, I’m sick and tiers of your comments and your judgements, all If your discrimination and lies, I AM GAY, I AM A NERD, And you know what YOUR AN ASSHOLE. if you think you can judge people because they like someone of […]
So here I am again, missing you. I can’t believe it’s almost been a year. I still haven’t gone through all our stuff, it hurts. You would have loved the place where I’m at now, its a little house on a 100 acre farm with a creek for fishin and train tracks and a whole lot of birds! Life is still hard, really hard, especially on my own. I’m looking for a second job so I can keep it, mama is losing her house so there is nowhere else for me to go now. I needed you baby, even […]
We are just suicidal people telling other suicidal people suicide isn’t the answer.
We all suffer
all cry
all depressed
all think
we are all just people
I hate how people think if you self harm or are suicidal your more of a special person or people don’t talk to you. Were not different we don’t have fucking three heads. Im tired of it all. The judges of it all, we cant be the same can we? Its like people wants us to suffer even more. But for anyone out there depressed or wanting to commit suicide just know one person will always be there. If not then its me even […]
I spend a lot of time thinking about the future. Wondering of ill travel the world, make it in broadway, get married and have kids, or give up  before I get the chance.
I wonder what what it is inside of me that makes my body ache and makes my mind fill up with hate. I don’t know how to stop it. I know that I should probably get help. Tell a parent. But in reality if I tell them all that goes on in my head they’ll send me away because “I’m a danger to myself.” And I wouldn’t be able to handle that. I […]
I’m stupid to think he would ACTUALLY want me….. WHY? Why does this always happen to me? I can’t even fucking CRY! He won’t talk to me, and he is with a new one. I warned her this time, because that f*cking b*tch is not worth her time. Not worth anyone’s time. He deserves to be alone. Sorry, but you don’t do this kinda crap to ANYONE. And I’m so tired of being used like this! I’m good until you get what you want and then you move on until you’re tired of them. Then where are you? Back to me because they won’t give […]
She picks up the tiny sharp object,
only to put it back down.
She tries to forget, but only reflects,
so much that she wants to drown.
They think she won’t break
but, oh lord, do they not know?
“I need to explain,” her hand shakes,
“My lowly tale of woe.”
Her heart is a drumbeat beating,
the rhythm is slow and steady.
“Why is life so bittersweet?”
She writes and clutches her teddy.
Hurt has left her feeling alone,
everyone else has done the same.
She wished she hadn’t picked up the phone
that cold september day.
“Slut” the phone spoke,
the words piercing her heart.
“*****” her […]
I hate myself, I hate people, everything hurts. I don’t understand happy people. Even if someone is not a psycho, most people are assholes. Everything depresses me, the pills don’t work, the exercise doesn’t work, therapy doesn’t work. A 15 year old boy was raped in the bathroom of my local mall. You’d think a kid that age is safe to go alone to the bathroom. I read that two 12 year old girls stabbed another 12 year old girl 19 times. A man tried to sell his baby for $50. What the fuck is this shit hole? How can anyone be happy? Is everyone […]
Every decision that I have made each mistake and failure in my life is floating around inside my head. The fact that i’m emotionally disconnected because I’m terrified of feeling anymore more pain. I don’t want anyone not even my ex and deep down I think I still love him. I still talk to him I still see him and I’m sure that’s a big mistake on my part. But I can’t let go maybe it’s because I’m afraid, maybe I like remembering the good. Its unhealthy I know that, but I seriously think that there is something wrong with me mentally. Is it wrong […]
life is full of surprises right and i have faith in it too but i dont get it why im being so impatient. there are things which i let go of and trust me i never had any regrets but these days it is different story, Â i always value my principles and morals and always used to think that if people come to me because they think im someone who have power and money they are not sincere. BUT lol due to this i have been isolated by my family they dont value me anymore they only pity me and that is quite upsetting i […]
“I kissed the scars on her skin.
I still think you’re beautiful, and I don’t ever wanna lose my best friend.
I screamed out,”God, you vulture, bring her back or take me with her!”
~Pierce the Veil