Really suicidal tonight. I’m so sick of life, of hurting, of empty fuckin promises. Tired of loosing people i love. Its like there’s a black hole where my heart is supposed to be, nno matter what i do i feel nothing but emptiness and pain. though this is only my second, I’m thinking this will be my last post.
goodnight
Sweet love that I held so close
The hand I held and needed most
The lips I kissed so many times
Oh love never were you mine
For a split second you let me believe
That I had you back and you’d never leave
I guess I was just the easiest to convince
But I haven’t stopped hurting since..
Oh love I know I’m easy to forget
But I’m so sure you were ‘it’
That person for whom I would give my life
But instead […]
”…1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink
Throw ’em back, till I lose count
I’m gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn’t exist
Like it doesn’t exist.
I’m gonna fly like a bird through the night, feel my tears as they dry.
I’m gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
But I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down won’t open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light, ’cause I’m just holding on for tonight.
Help me, I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down won’t open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light, […]
Well It looks like I’m all alone once again in my dorm room tonight.. Worse part is I walked down to the lobby of my dormitory and saw a big group of my friends playing a card with a group of guys. Said hi and they said hi back the rest just look at me awkwardly and do I say anything no. Thinking about reopening some old scars on my thighs with one of the spare razor blades in my dresser drawer to cover the pain for a while and just move on…. Much better then break down crying and maybe get some sleep.
So what […]
My essence, my essence, oh, eureka . . .
Hurl me, only my good friend knows
I lost or made one tonight
Whoa, but last night
I ate real quick and left
My essence, my essence, oh, eureka . . .
Rolling, my bike
Oh, Eureka
Where are you going
Zodiac, inside
Pegasus versus
To the other side
Totem, I chant to the sky
Hear me, heed, warrior
Tonight is the night I want to do it. However I am unprepared I have no note to leave for family or any remaining friends. Maybe of I devote the entirety of tomorrow to writing it I will be able to end it tomorrow night.
Fuck. Shitshitshit,
i relapsed again.
i can’t hear “YOU have to make things better” or “don’t expect everything to be handed to you on a silver plate” because fuck you. I know that.
I think I’m gonna try again tonight. Who knows? Maybe it’ll work?
I stumbled apon this page today while desperately searching for an explanation to my constant desire to end my own life. The posts that I have read thus far have touched my heart and soul in ways i cannot imagine, i relate to so many of these posts. As i have just mentioned I found this page today so this is my first post.
I am a 20 year old university student, on the forefront i seem like I have the world figured out and a future most people only dream of but here is the truth: I am alone in this world that has been […]
I lie here trying to get myself to understand why I so badly need to destroy my life tonight. I have pondered on every explanation as to why I want to watch my own blood flow like a river around me. I have a loving family that would protect me regardless the reason, a house which provides me with ample physical comfort, and a friend who would never think of judging me. I have so many reasons to live, and so many things to lose. I can tell myself that many times, but I can’t seem to accept it emotionally.
What if I did it. Right now. It would be so fucking easy. Nothing eloquent this time, just a myriad of pain and an option out tonight. Why can’t I be the one this time. I will write my own ended for a story that was never my own.
so long to all my friends everyone of them met tragic ends with every passing day i be lying if i didn’t say that i miss all to night and if they only knew what i would would say if i could be with you tonight i would sing you to sleep never let them take the light behind your eyes one day ill lose this fight as i fade in the dark just remember you will always burn as bright be strong and hold my hand time becomes us, you’ll understand we’ll say goodbye today and sorry how it ends this way if you […]
I thought I had her back… I thought we would be happy again… No, I always ruin the good things in my life… I have decided it is my time to leave. I can’t be here anymore. I can’t wake up every single day hating myself and everything that I have done to people. I just can’t do this anymore. I wake up every morning wondering how bad I am going to mess up again… I try to put up a fake smile but it’s never enough… I am gonna go tonight. Maybe all the people I have ever hurt will be happy I’m gone. […]
I think I’m going to kill myself tonight… I don’t have anything I feel happy for. I feel miserable. I don’t have anything to live for. I’ve tried meds, therapy, hotlines, doctors, but here I am…
I just don’t wanna live anymore. Yes I regret so may things and I want to do a lot of things in the future but not at the cost of what I have to go through everyday, depression and suicidal tendencies. I regret not showing my parents the lovely daughter I could be. I regret not being able to see my siblings’ future success in their career. I regret […]
the longer i stay the more it hurts but the more i stay the closer i get to seeing the girl who i love so much. The decision is unbareable as she knows how i feel at this moment and tries to convince me out of my solid thoughts, i don’t want her to be in grief but at the same time i don’t want to deal with our undesirable and stupid society….i wish i had never fallen in love with her nor met her and become so close to such an amazing girl yet fragile.
I’m not much of a sharer and I’ll probably never share with someone one on one but I feel death haunts me now daily and no one sees how depressed and suicidal I’m getting because I have a way of putting on a mask at the time and look the happiest and I held on to chancr of relationships and love but the girls I’ve loved, liked or simply pursued have the same conclusion harsh rejection. Jay just made me feel like shit and now the voices say I should jump the bridge or let my veins bleed out or buy a nine and go […]
You’re everything to me, No more as I wake from this perfect dream…
Can I not stay and live this lie? For I, must think, only of myself
And to think that you will not be scared or surprised I severed all these ties
This is the end. I’ll lose myself in anguish for tonight, help me get over you.
I feel so numb to see this bitter end, It has come to this end of beautiful illusions
Broken pieces will not mend, to save our past now.
This is the end.
Hi, guys. Bit of a long story here, will try to keep it short.
I’m Pixie, I’m 22 and I live with my fiancee, as well as severe depression.
I have been known to drink to cope with my problems in the past. It has caused problems, for which I have taken action on and done my best to cope with therapy and medication. It has helped to some degree.
However, tonight my boyfriend went out to a party he didn’t invite me to, even though the host of the party did, and came home drunk and abusive. He told me to f-off and shut up any time […]
I shouldn’t be awake right now. I have to be up for work at 6. But I can’t sleep. I’ve been heartbroken over the same person for a year now. As soon as i start to forget him, he contacts me again. I just spoke to him and I feel like the worst kind of person because I’m seeing someone else. But he and I were together for two years. We were engaged. And then he cheated. I’m in college and lost my biggest scholarship because I don’t have enough hours. I now owe $1000 that I don’t have. I’m doing so badly in some […]
Haven’t sleep ok in months. Neither tonight. But this morning… the cold seems to be gone. My dog’s head is on my arm. Somehow, the world seems to be quiet, and birds start to be back. For almost an hour, I slept like a child. Time to wake up. I’m still afraid of talking to people.
But for an hour, everything was ok.