Yeah well I’m gonna be the first and I’m going to alienate some people here, but we, in Australia, just lost a visionary in Gough Whitlam. Wow, what a mark he left on our land and our consciousness. He was a visionary and a reformist. To some he made have tried to do too much but what a legacy he left in just a short time. Not many people get to do what he did and I personally want to bring his achievements to this site. Please explore this great man in Australian politics. Few get the chance to make their mark…he did. Vale Gough […]
Tag:
too much
I think I’m done with people. I wish they’d at least give me a chance to die without having to suffer with this melancholic mind of mine, but people never fail to disappoint. A peaceful escape is just too much to ask for. I have no friends outside of the family, only feeling okay with my mother and brother. Each day, I feel like I am drifting further apart from them as well. I’m losing interest in talking to people as there is nothing to say. My connections are based on nothing more than materialism. People just can’t connect with me emotionally, philosophically, etc., or […]
Like it or not we are all 1 day closer to the end:-) I keep a loaded firearm close at all times but too much of a ***** to turn it on myself. Something will happen soon (I hope) Alcohol is my friend, my only true friend!!!
I’m freaking out about not having enough hours at work, not having a place to live, not having money to pay my bills, not being able to find a second job, and having to do all this shit alone.
This is too much shit for one person to handle. Enough is enough. I seriously feel so freaked and panicked and anxious about everything that I wanna just go jump off a bridge and be done with this shit.
You win, Universe. You wanted to see how much fucking shit one person could really take, and this is it. I’m fucking done, you win, I’m not playing anymore.
Thank […]
Living and killing myself are both just too hard and take too much effort. I am tired of exerting myself everyday, trying to appear like I’m normal and belong on this Earth. All I want to do is lie in bed, put blankets over my head, and somehow stop my incessant thoughts. If I did this though, I would once again be treated as if my personal rights did not exist. My space would be invaded once again. I wouldn’t be allowed to do anything again on my own. My overprotective parents wouldn’t let me sleep alone or do work in my room alone or […]
I’ve been trying to meditate recently to clear my mind of suicidal thoughts. I plan on doing it in the next six months. But, in the meantime, I’ve got to get some stuff in order. I don’t want to live the next few months planning out my suicide. I want to live well and try new things before I die. And hell, maybe, just maybe, one of those new things will lead to something that makes me want to live again?
So I read that meditation can help with suicidal or obsessive thoughts. I decided to try it out. But I just can’t do it. I […]
Humanity seems to believe the absurd ideology that all humans are created equal. Therefore, when someone has something like ADHD, or some other disorder, be it mental or physical, of course others will try to ostracise them! We’re raised in a society that says everyone is the same, and that people can do anything if they set their minds to it. This society is fucked up. Many “disorders” or “syndromes” aren’t detrimental at all, but rather, they’re different ways of acting and perceiving. Why can’t they be respected as such, and why do people with these differences have to be seen as inferior to others […]
How would you define a loser?
Let’s see:
Would a 25 year old who cannot hold down a job for more than 6 weeks without getting fired and who has been unemployed for about 2 years qualify? Still living under your parents roof?
How about the person of the same age never having been in a relationship or have even had a real kiss? (The main issue being societies expectations. It does not really bother me too much.)
Or what about having no real friends because you have such poor social skills, get socially anxious and are known to have a temper? Where even mental health staff have given […]
People say that just having been born is a miracle…but what if your life has just seemed like a constant unrelenting series of break and enters. That’s how I feel. All of my major stages of life right from early childhood have just been marked with catastrophic events. I’ve posted before what’s happened to me so I won’t go into that again <hears cheers>. I’ve had two psychologists tell me that I’m the worse case they’ve seen. One even told me that even though she’s trained not too feel her patient’s pain she told me that my case affected her. That’s no lie. At 53 […]
I’ve been trying to write a break-up letter to my mother for at least a week now. The week before, I waited to make sure I was making the right choice and was not acting uncharacteristically emotional.
I want to write this letter, but I just can’t be bothered. It seems like too much effort. Maybe I need to write down the main points and then flesh it out. Don’t really know why I’m doing it though. I mean, if I’m never going to speak to her or any of her siblings again, do I really care what she thinks? Maybe I’m doing it so she […]
I know she cares and I know she loves me. But it still makes me sad when I try so hard to talk to her and make her happy and make her laugh and she just plain ignores me and plays with her phone, like a kid. It makes my heart hurt.
Just wanted to share that so someone, anyone, in the world knows. I hide too many feelings. I lie too much, mostly to myself.
My brokenness has cost me the man who matters most and has isolated me from my children. There is no way to rebuild. There is too much work and I don’t have the strength. I am so scared. I am a coward. A trashy piece of worthless wasted air.
I don’t trust anyone, especially myself. I hid razor blades throughout the house. Figured that was a smart thing to do. ha ha ha
What the fuck was the point of this existence?
Aside from TV shows/movies and videogames there isn’t much that keeps me going. I messed up my education by being lazy (BSO, in belgium that’s the lazy person’s course where they don’t actually teach you shit) so I have barely any motivation for college that I’m starting next week but hey, gotta keep the parents happy. Ideal situation would be some sort of disease that doesn’t hinder me too much but kills me after 3 years, so I atleast know how game of thrones ends (can’t be assed to wait for the books, knowing grrm we’ll have the last book when I’m 40). Too much […]
Hello readers/posters:
I am new to this board. Honestly, I never knew such a place existed (I guess I am less imaginative than I once thought). I found you by doing searched for methodology in suicide, which I will not share here per the guidelines and strictures of this site.
Short story of why:
I lost the joy and love of my life recently. No, not due to death. Worse. She found someone else and walked out. I was caught wholly unaware. The rage and sorrow and loss are too much.
I am not a successful man. I have a low-end job at a local donut shop. Hardly where […]
I have been in pain for years and I think about ending my life everyday. It’s not about wanting to die, but there is too much pain to handle any more. At this point I am trying to get things in order.
For me, the pain started decades ago when I was abused by priests. I tried to live with it, and for a long time I was able to cope. Unfortunately my mental health has deteriorated along with my physical health for many years and it is no longer a weight that I can carry. I have been diagnosed and re-diagnosed several times – enough […]
In the end I know two things that are completely and utterly true; that I do not matter, and that I am not enough. All my life I have felt completely and utterly alone, and this is partly my doing. I pushed away my friends and I isolated myself because I didn’t want them to get hurt when I inevitably killed myself; and I am finding that I am once again feeling this way. I cannot take the pain anymore, and my life will never get any better if it hasn’t even marginally improved over the last eight years. I wanted […]
I just got done watching The Last SOng, which is a total tear jerking… im in love with this movie and the message it sends. My mom is a cancer patient, she has a type of Leukemia. Ive wasted so much time with her, ive been rude, not understanding, really selfish, and at any moment her health could turn for the worth and she could be gone from my life. SHe is the one person who I could literally not live without, she is MY rock she is my everything and i dont think ive told her enough just how much i really love her. […]
My Body is hurting like crazy I hope my pain has a limit because I’m so tired of it all damn muscles spasms n it’s too much pain I have pills but I choose not to take them my spine n back feel like the springs on a slinky going forward I have a few friends I like to chat with n to maybe help me to get better in a way by making me laugh n at times I just don’t know whether I want to just throw in the towel n say I’m done with life it seems I’ve been waiting […]
Wonder if anyone will ever read this? Long story, short I’ve been severely crippled in a motorcycle crash. Life for me has been changed drastically since I awoke from the coma. Life like this seems pointless however I have 2 children. Shit I can rant and rave about what the last 3 1\2 years have been like but what good will it do? I should have died that day, I don’t want to continue this way! I have guns but am too much of a ***** to pull the trigger on myself and would like to obtain ******** but I’m still trying to find a […]
Yesterday, I completely lost hope. I needed to die. Like right now. I was choking because of my tears. My bestfriend – and the guy I’m in love with – didn’t want me to talk to him anymore. Because everything was my fault. Because it was my fault that I fell in love with him. Because it was my fault that everyone has noticed it.
I can’t live without him. Even the weird relationship we’re having was much sufficient for me to hold on. But him cutting me out of his life was too much for me to handle.
I scarred myself. But I didn’t bleed to […]