Tag:

want

Some Thoughts

by Hood 2/1/2014

written by Hood

I’ve been thinking of suicide frequently ever since junior high, Â and I’ve also been thinking lately that I just don’t want to be happy or content. In part, I just can’t imagine myself as a happy, smiling person; it actually makes me uncomfortable. I would need to change so much about myself, and part of me even hates happy, optimistic people. It seems like I would always be wearing a mask. I’ll list a few other thoughts as numbered points:

Being serious and unemotional makes me feel more in control of day to day situations. I’m worried that acting friendly would invite too many people who […]

2/1/2014 2 comments

People Are Full Of Bull.

by Peachturnover 2/1/2014

written by Peachturnover

People tell you to not kill yourself and they give you every fucking reason to do it. How’s about it’s my life and I will deal however I feel like I can to get over the pain. Someone hurts you and then tells you how to deal? That’s just bullshit. I believe if you don’t want to go through pain, you shouldn’t cause it in the first place. You can’t call yourself a good person and then go around using people. I never thought a piece of ass was so damn worth hurting someone over. Or money for that matter. I always thought that as […]

2/1/2014 3 comments

Overwhelming thoughts

by goingnumb 2/1/2014

written by goingnumb

I just want to slit my wrists I want to so bad..it’s killing me I have so many thoughts racing through my mind. I just want us to work out you know I want these thoughts to stop I’m close to being done again

2/1/2014 5 comments

want to die

by hopetodie 2/1/2014

written by hopetodie

yes I wish I could just give my life to someone who was dying for some one facing death yet Â wanted to live thatâ€™s how bed I want to die im going to end my life soon as I find a good way to end it im 51 years old and sick of life

2/1/2014 2 comments

I just want to be happy again…

by Speedy 2/1/2014

written by Speedy

So many things have changed. My best friend/cousin is dead. My relationship is deteriorating. Every night it’s the same. I think of her and how I wish she was still alive and how I want to be dead. It should have been me instead of her. Everything right now is such a mess. School. Friends. My relationship. I don’t eat right. All I have been thinking about is death. It’s been a year now with these thoughts. Maybe more time. My daydreams are about suicide, how I’d do it and when..

2/1/2014 1 comment

and ” i am loving it “

by addicted 2/1/2014

written by addicted

Even if I got all the powers in the world

I still feel depressed and addicted to suicideÂ with no reason

2/1/2014 0 comment

Need of love.

by Jombo 2/1/2014

written by Jombo

At 12 when I did my first depression, I really wanted to die so badly. Then I found that what I really wanted in life was love. Everything I ever did what for that goal and it’s the only thing that makes me happy. The only thing that could keep me alive, the only thing that would make my life worth living. So yea, I needed to be loved and didn’t try to kill myself, it was some kind of a second chance I thought. Second chance… for what? to feel even more miserable, hurt and dead inside? The only thing that keeps me alive […]

2/1/2014 0 comment

Just Too Tired

by TheHours 1/31/2014

written by TheHours

Ever been woken at 3 am? Remember being sooo tired that you can hardly move?

Now imagine you’re cold but too tired to get up to get an extra blanket.
Or maybe you have to go to the bathroom but you’re too tired.
Have you ever fallen asleep in an uncomfortable spot, e.g., your car, the living room floor, etc. but you’re too tired to get up?

That’s how I feel when I’m at my lowest point of depression & when I have my strongest desire to leave.

I may want to “get up” but I cannot. I’m just “too tired”. The thought of getting showered, […]

1/31/2014 4 comments

Breaking

by LetItGo 1/31/2014

written by LetItGo

Breaking

I feel broken
I know its not good
To keep feelings bottled up
But I feel if I do tell my feelings
I feel annoying
I donâ€™t know why
And I donâ€™t know how
But I do

I will fake a smile
To make people happy
I will give you a compliment
To make you happy
Sometimes I want to be happy
But sometimes we canâ€™t get what we want

I live a life of lies
I lie
I know I know itâ€™s bad
But its not really lying
More like not telling the WHOLE truth
I want my friends to be happy
I know that in […]

1/31/2014 2 comments

Bad weather days…

by PhantomShadow 1/31/2014

written by PhantomShadow

I hate bad weather days…Â I am absolutely useless on days like today.Â My whole body is in pain and I can’t focus.Â I want so much to do things but I can’t…it’s like my hand-brake is on and I am smoking rubber trying to get anywhere.Â Sometimes I just want to curl up into a corner and cry my self to sleep.Â Yesterday, on a post challenging all of us to tell the truth of how we feel, I mentioned that I had a arthritis flair…well this is why…Â I can forecast bad weather days ahead of time.

I wonder sometimes how much my physical […]

1/31/2014 0 comment

Touch me, please

by annoyingburdenchild95 1/31/2014

written by annoyingburdenchild95

I need you to touch me. Make me feel wanted. Pull my hair, choke me, I don’t care! Just make it sweet. Make me feel loved. Help me believe you still want me, when all the signs say no. I yearn to feel you again, or for you to at least want me. I remember when you loved me… Oh, I remember…

1/31/2014 2 comments

Will I ever be happy again?

by Invisible2theWorld 1/31/2014

written by Invisible2theWorld

I know it is selfish for me to be jealous of my family and friends that are dating their boyfriends or girlfriends. I just can’t help it. Ever since I fell for you and you decided to rip my heart out I just can’t stand seeing others happy. I mean sure I am really happy for them because I care about them, but I just don’t understand why I’m not happy like them. They have everything going for them and a man or lady on there side. Oh man, how I wish to kiss a boy. I haven’t in so long. I just want to […]

1/31/2014 3 comments

Over The Breasts of a Lion

by AscahIsBroken 1/31/2014

written by AscahIsBroken

We fuck up what can’t be fucked

Master may I rip out your virgin heart

Spit claw eating out danger

I’d kill a thousand men and it wouldn’t be for you
I’ll kill a thousand more before I’d kill beside you
But I couldn’t kill one if he looked at me like you

Does it hurt me to love you
It hurts me to hate you
Break up me up when the blood rises

We look at each other when it suits us to die
Your master possesses when you want to tell lies
Cry touch playing a victim
I’d fuck a thousand men before I’d ever want to touch […]

1/31/2014 1 comment

when will i snap

by passionfruit3 1/31/2014

written by passionfruit3

I hate the fact how i can do good not being sucidal and staying out of hospitals.Then you make one stupid mistake and it ruins everything.My mistake was being curious and that curiousity led me to find the pills my mom hid away..I now have a bunch of those pills and dont know when i will snap and try to kill myself.I just know i cant help it and it willl happen.I will try to kill myself at some point.Ive only told my best friend she asked if she could tell my parents i threatened to do it sooner if she did.I felt bad about […]

1/31/2014 0 comment

Unforgiven (sorry, its long)

by Disgusting soul 1/30/2014

written by Disgusting soul

They are disgusting. They have a need to feel superior to one another, in looks or friends or personality. They stole all my hard work away. I will lose everything because of them.

I live with three other girls. I’m okay with one of them, it does annoy me when she is slow or in my way. But other wise she’s fine. My issue is with the other two.

I’ve known one of them since, 2nd grade or something. We’ve been best friends for a super long time. But i have never shown her my weakness. I have never shown her my true side. I just show […]

1/30/2014 0 comment

by msquared 1/30/2014

written by msquared

i don’t want to kill myself i just can’t live anymore. this is not a life. i can’t be who i know i am i have to be what somebody else thinks i am. my life is defined by them. not who i am TODAY. i hate my life, i truly mean that, i have nothing, and i can’t just live life. i am my own person. I’m not what somebody else thinks of me. but what difference does it make if i can’t show them that! i have to go on everyday like this?! the only person i care about is the one who […]

1/30/2014 4 comments

anybody want to go sky diving

by shallowstares 1/30/2014

written by shallowstares

and let it be the death of us. i want to go sky diving and just leave this worldÂ that way, at least it’d be exciting for the majority of the time.

1/30/2014 5 comments

“I Go Back to May 1937” by Sharon Olds

by khajiit 1/30/2014

written by khajiit

“I see them standing at the formal gates of their colleges,

I see my father strolling out

under the ochre sandstone arch, the

red tiles glinting like bent

plates of blood behind his head, I

see my mother with a few light books at her hip

standing at the pillar made of tiny bricks,

the wrought-iron gate still open behind her, its

sword-tips aglow in the May air,

they are about to graduate, they are about to get married,

they are kids, they are dumb, all they know is they are

innocent, they would never hurt anybody.

I want to go up to them and say Stop,

donâ€™t do itâ€”sheâ€™s the wrong woman,

heâ€™s the wrong man, you are […]

1/30/2014 9 comments

Talk

by saygoodbye 1/30/2014

written by saygoodbye

Do you want someone to just talk? That won’t judge, that won’t insult, that will care? Just email me at saygoodbyetoday@gmail.com. I’ll listen and I promise I will care. Or comment down below…

1/30/2014 1 comment

broken

by brokenanchor 1/30/2014

written by brokenanchor

Yesterday I was told by my last close friend that her mom doesn’t want me coming over to her house anymore and I don’t know why its like she doesn’t trust me. Right now I just don’t know what to do because all my other friends have gone of to varsity and I’m just at home feeling like a piece of crap. My parents aren’t paying as much attention to what’s going on with me as they should because I’m really losing it. I want to just shoot my self in the head and just end this misery because I’m literally dying inside…I have no-one…everyone […]

1/30/2014 1 comment

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