Another beautiful evening in my family. As usual, my dad threatens to kill himself, and my mother says he can do it, because she can’t take it anymore. After that, he turns violent and starts smashing things… It’s a mystery to me how he managed to smash so many things in so little time… Tonight is different though… He’s serious about commiting suicide… And quite frankly, I don’t give a flying fuck anymore… Go and hang yourself, you pathetic drunk asshole… Old violent and manipulative ************… He wanted my mom to have an abortion when she was pregnant with me, then, he rejected me as […]
Tag:
wanted
I’ve been thinking a lot in how would things be if I die. It’s complicated. I don’t want people to suffer because I’m not here… is not anyone’s fault. But it’ll be awesome to know how many people care about you, even if it’s just for a moment. Wish I could take things better so I wouldn’t be thinking in suicide as the best option. Good luck everyone.
See, after the last girl that seemed crazy about me turned me down and wanted to be friends (and I was stupid enough to believe things would be different this time) I want to know, how do I get a girlfriend? Should I just make my standards so low I can’t possibly get rejected? Just go for people with no self-esteem and don’t actually look like girls to begin with? Is that the key, just have no standards whatsoever? Or should I just say screw it and end my life, because I’m sick of this.
Well guys i’ve been through a lot in my life and im only 21.. i just love talking to people and getting to know everyone like i wanted to be treated back when i was younger.. i was always alone and always picked on by so many people… i was made to feel so worthless and so empty. It come to the point where my own parents didnt even want to know me :c For 4 years they still havent seen me.. or talked to me and that hurts, mainly cause my bro and sis follow in my moms footsteps and listen to her… My […]
Life is not fair / unfair. there is always winners & losers. I’m a loser, so why can’t I / losers just commit suicide?
by niki
written by niki
Life is not fair.
Life is unfair.
there is always winners & losers.
there will always be winner & loser.
so why can’t I / losers just commit suicide?
rather than they keep living chasing & fixing all their way too many losses, which is probably too late anyway too.
and usually losers can’t win / can never win against winners anyway .. even the “start” is already too late!!
This is the harsh truth / fact / reality .
Reality / Real life / Real world is very LIMITING / LIMITED in what we can & can’t do !
We are limited by money […]
I turned 25 Monday. I feel old. days with my boyfriend go up and down the arguments got bad then I finally stood up for myself and he realized he was close to losing me. I can’t lose him again I just can’t. but the craving for death is always here.. yes I know this made no sense. ps wanted to apologize for never posting my life story, I still keep putting it off
All I wanted was to be with her. She was the only one that actually cares. She noticed me when no one else would. She hang out with me because nobody else wanted to. I fell in love with her then a week later she acts like I don’t exist and tells me she can’t be with me anymore. I try to be friends with her for the next week but I can’t understand why she would hurt me like that. I needed her more than anything in the world and she hates me for a reason I don’t even know and was never told. […]
I was at UBC Universal Behavioral Center I was there for 6 months that I tried to kill myself 3 times nothing worked I tried cutting my wrist vertically and horizontally and tying things around my neck that didn’t work because people found me.I still have suicidal thoughts I’m not acting on it because I don’t want to get in trouble and I want to be trusted .I have had two girlfriends the first one I dated for a few days I broke up with because she wanted to date more than one person my second lasted more than a week she claimed to be […]
You just don’t fit? Like everything has just come together wrong and you somehow stopped being right in your own life (if you ever even were) and there’s just no place for you? Like maybe you just came off the assembly line broken? I’m feeling that way tonight (or actually this morning because I’ve spent five hours sitting here contemplating this). Wrong choices, wrong people, wrong planet maybe. I feel like I just don’t fit anywhere, like I never have been “right”, something was wrong from the get-go. It’s been a long time since I have been this low, since I have sat back and […]
I’m at breaking point again. I fell off the rails big time 2 years ago after I was sexually assaulted twice by two different people in 3 months. It took me a while to get back on my feet. I have been to see psychologists and councillors all of which who have different diagnosis and long waiting lists. I thought I could do this by myself but I can’t, whenever I am reminded of either assault in any way I freak out. I’m scared all the time, I’m scared of boys, I shake all the time, I can’t do public transport, I’m just lost.
I’m 23 […]
This is my first post on here I am a 24 year old man that has been struggling with depression since 16 the women that I love moved in with me a few days ago because her dad hit her and threttened to hit her kid we where getting pretty close and I was excited to have the possibility to help raise the kid I had come to thinking of as my own all I have ever wanted was a house a good job and someone to share my life with I was so close I hadn’t even thought about suiside in weeks all of […]
This is long, if you don’t mind, but I’m sad and I tend to get all blabbery when that happens.
Lately it’s been very apparent that people don’t cut me the same slack that they would virtually anyone else (literally, from douche bags to decent people and everywhere in between–this has been tested). And because this seems to be a repeating phenomenon; where I’m given not even a second chance, I can’t help but wonder: am I really so unsavory of both character and appearance that I warrant indecency? But even that doesn’t make sense to me. People have told me I’m “hot.” People have told me that I’m “really sweet.” People […]
Well, this is my first post here and I might as well start off by telling everyone why suicide sounds pretty great right now. I’m not attracted to girls like guys should be. I’m not attracted to other guys either. Well, I kinda am. Guys between the ages 2 and 10. Yup you read that right.
Ok, let me explain some things first; a pedophile is NOT a child molester. I’ve never hurt a kid and I never will, because I have a conscience. I love kids, so I don’t see why I’d ever want to do something as horrible and selfish as raping one. Not […]
this past week has been good to me. i should be very grateful for the people in my life who seem to care about me–but i’m not. (i’m still more grateful for the people i like who i am not sure even like me back as a person. whenever they give me the time of day it feels as though they’re doing me a great service that i should be appreciative of, and i am.) yesterday was such an amazing day. i finally got what i’ve been wanting for months now, and i finally got to hug him (no one else’s hugs matter compared to […]
I was have been depressed since march of this year. and the trigger was separation from my husband. I have loved my husband and left everything for him and now he kicked me out of the house because i called the cops on him as i was slapped and was injured once. I have hired a lawyer to get the charged dropped or atleast convey to the prosecutor for leniency. We both have our flaws and i am from get go willing to seek couples counselling. I have been so helpless and a failure as i was hoping to be a good wife. i still love my […]
Imagination better than reality? Why Imagination is better than reality? Why is Imagination better than reality?
by niki
written by niki
Why Imagination is better than reality?
Why is Imagination better than reality?
Why is fantasy better than reality? Why fantasy is better than reality?
What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality / human’s fantasy is better than reality.
for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, Interstellar, etc etc, they are much more interesting, full of POSSIBILITIES & varieties / variations, and better than reality / BORING reality […]
All I ever wanted to be was loved by own parents but I guess I don’t get that, otherwise I wouldn’t be wishing to be dead. Life’s shit when you think about it why are we even on a planet just to reproduce the population. It’s utter stupidity I can’t stand this pain anymore I just want it to go away and never come back, what did I do to deserve this am I really that bad of a person to deserve this. Please anyone help me
I’ve never wrote on one of these sites before, and up until recently I thought I was always capable of overcoming the self loathing I feel every day.
It changed recently, my wife left me and now I can no longer speak with her other than through occasional text messages.
I want to find hope in those messages, but I can’t I spent everyday crying and focusing on my way out of this. I’ve ordered everything I need to leave this world except my gas which will be coming soon.
She wanted me to get help and now I am it doesn’t seem to be […]
i wanted to killmyself by putting myself onfire
so i went to the basement and realized that forgot to bring a lighter
will try again tommorow