Need to tell this to someone

Ok here we go…this all started when i was 11 years old and all of the sudden evrything in my life just crashed. Well my life was always messed up since the start i never lived with my father and always stood with my grandma until my mom found a guy and forced me to live with them but then when i was 11 this “great” guy my mom loved even more that herself or me i guess just decided to go away leaving my mom pregnant and paying for our new house and car, just left her alone we lost our car and almost our house and my mom started getting depressive crying every night my grandfather used to drink too a lot and screamed insulted my grandma and there was not a happy place for me any more a new girl arrived at school and convinced my “friends” that i was a looser and that i was not worth it so nobody talked to me anymore i thought as myself as someone ugly uncapable of being loved and felt nobody cared i remember i used to count the days waiting for the vacations i hated recess because i was always left alone, that girl left school. everybody hated her anyway at the end of the year but then i got new friends 2 actualy and they helped me survive for 2 years until one of them left and the other got tired of being with me he just knew i depended on him to feel emotionaly safe, well, he was bullied too he was called “gay” but he was not as shy as me so he used me to get new “friends” i guess the only thing he could find in common with everyone else was that he could make fun of me for about every possible thing he could think of, it was unbearable to go every day to a place where everybody was going to make me feel like garbge i mean i found yogourt spread on my bag nick names written on my desk and the worst of all was that my “friend” was realy cute with me when we were alone because i knew he understood he was bullied too but he became a hypocrit when he was with everybody else and i felt betrayed every time he did that i became anorexic counting every calorie because he used to call me fat….. one day i could not take it any more, i spent nights crying i told my self i was not worth it, i used to hurt myself. so i tried to kill my self one night i still remember how relieved and scared i was because the pain inside my chest was just unbareble i really thought i was going to die that day and i remember i was happy i was afraid of dying but i was more afraid to try and fail and that everybody would know what i did but it did not happen i dont know how or why but i survived the next day i felt like if i was hit by a train and i knew i looked terrible but not even my mom could figure out what was going on i will never forget that day that time or what i felt… but since i could not die i thought i just had to salve my self that maybe i had to live and i guess i gave my self a second chance i started to take care of myself more and tried to be strong and i did it, it was not easy and i am not completeley over it at all but i am 16 years old now about to turn 17 and i am not part of the “popular” group but i have lots of cool friends now of course i am not bullied any more i talk to the “popular” girls but i guess i know what i am and now i realize they are not worth it , I feel free now. It does not gets easier, in the worst days i still think about suicide about what i did but i have more hope now and I remind myself all of the good moments i had after the day i tried to kill myself, and I realize bad times will go away they do not last too much and I just need to keep living in the best way i can every day of my life now even if it gets hard.