i hope this is my last letter

i am tired of being a coward i fantasize  about suicide for past 3 months i planning to go tonight in a few hours and drive a designated place i know that is going to be painful but it will end i just want to see if i have the guts to do it i hope that ill be able to reincarnate and try to have a better life  i hope that those ideas of hell are non true as i was writting this a family member opened the door of my room not aware of my intentions i might not end up doing it but i want to go the place that i wanted to do it at and at that moment i will know