Im in my 3rd year of college. In the past i never really tried to put an effort in my academics since i naturally excel at it. My family especially my parents keeps on pressuring me to excel and be the top of my year since my parents think that finally one of their children was able to “inherit” their intellect. So this semester I had tried to put some efforts in my academics but to my frustration i failed all my subjects. Everyone around me, even my friends hero worship me because they think that im so great and that not true at all but i am pressured to be someone im not when im around them since whenever i show them my real self they would say that it doesnt suit me. My parents thinking i still excel at my class keep on pressuring me to do much better. But when i told them i cant do it anymore and suggested i rest for a year since i feel that within a year i could recover and once again try.but then they just got so angry at me and told me that i dont have a heart and doesnt care how much they,my parents, work hard so i doubled my effort and in some cases triple my effort but no matter how much i tried i still get a frustrating result. To lessen the stress that im feeling i developed a compulsive eating habit and i start to get fat. And when i cant take it anymore, i once again told my mom that i cant do it anymore and my mother yell at me and called me a useless child and told me im only great in eating and im like leech that keep sucking the family’s money and i should be glad that they had been my parents.Even though I want to share my problem with someone, i cant find anyone i can talk to since my friends think i have such a perfect life and my sister just cant understand the pressure that im feeling because she was never subjected to such pressure.Recently, i tied a rope(the one styled like the rope for a hanging man)in my room. I cant handle the pressure anymore. Please help me.
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All I know to say is I wish I could give u a hug you sound like an amazing person I hope you find someone that can show you that your amazing. There’s no way I can really help you but I hope a magical rainbow unicorn flies into your life and makes it all better XD you shouldn’t go to that school if you don’t want to because it’s your life and if your parents think that you are wasting there money someone needs to hit them. They are wasteing there money by trying to force there child into something they dont want to do. I’m so sorry for you I hate physical contact but if I was there I would give you the biggest hug ever 😛
“if I am useless then you failed to raise me, if I have use then you are to blind to see me, that means I succeed if your not looking”
You should live your life I have a feeling you have done better at it then they have think about it and make your self smile when you finish reading this … For me because I care 🙂 I really do
Thank You.. 🙂
HI Sandara. Gosh I’m sorry. It sounds like depression is getting a hold on you, and this would explain the downturn in your academic performance. Your parents don’t sound very understanding, their ambitions for you seem to have blinded them to the gravity of what’s going on with you Sandara.
I had a similar thing happen to me, I got through high school all right but became clinically depressed when I was 19 after a gap year and didn’t want to go to University at that point, I knew I wasn’t well enough even though I hadn’t been diagnosed and didn’t at that time realise that I had depression. However my mother pressured me into going. I ended up dropping out after a year and a half. I would have been right to go ahead with Plan A, my instincts had been right.
Emotional turnoil and pain OF COURSE affects our ability to learn just as it affects our ability to do many other things. Somehow I think you need to get across to your parents that you are not well. Maybe see a doctor and get a diagnosis, go on medication if it seems the right thing to do? Then your parents would have to sit up and take notice.
You seem very intelligent, but education is something you can catch up on and do in your own time. I think you could do with some time out. The ambitions of parents for us are THEIR stuff. They want to live through their kids to some degree. It is not fair to put that on you. Please hold out for what you need Sandara. Zx
hello louise.thank you for the advice.
After reading ur comment I tried telling my mom how I think that there might be something wrong with me, specifically on my psychological health but then she told me that she doesnt believe in things like psychological illnesses since she only believe that a person should only consider illness as something that can be proven by equipments like high temperature for fever and she told me that what i might feeling right now are just my imagination and should stop being such a drama queen.
Right now Im struggling a lot. My compulsive eating habit had gotten worse to the point that I no longer command my body to eat, my body just move by itself and eat and eat a lot and i would just be conscious of what i did after wolfing all the food in the house.I no longer know what to do..
Please dont take medication you should be you don’t let something else create a new you but I think maybe you should see a doctor but really do what you want of everything I think you should take charge of your life