Has anyone ever felt as if they are just waiting to die? I have a job, great friends who love me, and no REAL reason to not enjoy life. I just cannot seem to get past this feeling that I have accomplished all I am going to, nothing interests me, and I am just wasting time until I die. Would love to come to terms with this and possibly get past it. I have done the therapy thing but to be honest it just seems to aggrivate me, being asked the same questions over and over. Any input, from anyone, is welcome. I have edited this to add that I have seriously thought about suicide but it just seems as thought my apathy towards life extends to death.  I don’t WANT to die, but I don’t seem to have anything that makes me want to live. I little help, or criticism (I can take it) would be welcome as I have tried to talk to friends and I don’t think they REALLY understand what I am feeling.
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I, too, feel the same way as you do. Life has always seemed like a one way street to me, with nothing at the end. People always say “but there IS something to look forward to!” But what is that? A lopsided gamble that may or may not pay off? I found out something when I was 8; if you keep asking “why?” Then you will eventually run out of reasons. That solidified my hypothesis that there really is no greater purpose; that nothing we do will ever amount to anything in this tiny blip of time that we have here on earth. I have legitimately stumped doctors with this. I’ve found that the only things worth living for are the really small things; hobbies genuinely have gotten my through the past four years. Find something you love to to, preferably something aerobic. This is a shallow existence, to be sure; but when you find something (or someone) who you love, it can bring you through the bad times.
If you want to text me, here’s my cell: (860) 581-3113
I know exactly how you feel, you aren’t alone.
Thanks for the offer. Not sure if I want to go outside posting here. But thank you very much, I do appreciate the gesture. In an airport now, getting on a flight home. More to follow soon, you response was way more cerebral than I would have expected.
Hello ctalbert1970,Yes, i had felt as waiting to die since years. Now, i am only sur for one little thing: if you ask your-self why you sould live, the answer is in the field of religion. You belive or not that there are something after death. For me i am agnostic, i don’t know if there are a god or not. I have no big raison to live, i contemplate carefully my life by doing projects. Like Cyanide, i live for really small things: a cafe, a bier with my friends, a beautiful landscape, a smile, …, and for loving someone some day.I encourage you to talk with yours friends again, they are so important.You are not alone, if you want, i create a mail for you: to.pursuing.happiness@gmail.com