I have been depressed before. I know what it’s like. I have even cut before but nothing has ever hurt as bad as I feel now. I cut again for the first time Sunday night. I hadn’t cut for at least 3 years before, my mom found out and got me help last time. I won’t/can’t let her find out again. I want help but I don’t want to disappoint my mom again. I don’t hate my life I just hate what I a having to deal with. I don’t want to die but I am tired of living. I am not someone who deals with mental pain very well but I can physical..I guess that’s why I cut again..I have no idea what to do..I just want all of the pain to end.
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May I know what is your pain?
I think if you don’t want to disappoint your mother you should tell her and getting some help again. In case you don’t want to tell her, you should try to fight with this and think about the good things in life. Trust me, if you start to see the beauty everywhere, you will feel better. It works for me. Think about good memories or good things in your future.
Mental pain leaves scars too, but it’s good that you were actually helped when you felt this way before. Is there anyone else you have? A friend? Another relative? I do know it’s not easy opening to anyone though.
I posted another story called “Advice Please” it gives a just of my pain but only the stuff that happened recently. I haven’t cut since Sunday I have been taking your advice and trying to look at the good in like but sometimes I just can’t and I break down.
I have one friend I think..She knows whats going on but she doesn’t really know how to help…I am not sure anyone could.
Is the friend one whom you see in real life or someone on the Internet? It’s a shame they don’t know how to help though.
I can see her sometimes but not very often. We talk on fb everyday.
It’s better than nothing, but, for me, I think having someone physically is better. I’m not trying to undermine online relationships, they’re amazing, but I feel they’re limited.
They are very limited. Me and her were more than friends at one time but her bf moved down from Louisiana and things got awkward. (I am a girl, her bf knew about me and we were both okay with her having both of us) He never seemed to want me there. I felt weird so I broke up with her to be just friends again. I don’t get to see her often because the main reason of my pain is her baby daddy. My life and relationships are completely fucked up I know but hell we are from one of the smallest towns in Fl, everyone knows everyone.
At least you remained friends after being more than that. What’s worse? – having no romance between or the long-distance friendship? I loved someone myself, I was never in the relationship, but i didn’t feel she’d accept and that’d ruin our friendship, but now we don’t even talk. I tried. It doesn’t feel nice knowing I don’t have either. My relationships are all fucked up or non-existent, it feels great!
Yeah. Good point.