I hate every second I spend in this hell hole that’s supposed to be my home. I hate looking at my dad, every time I do I feel this surge of resentment. Im tired of being that bastard’s punching bag, the fuck up to blame when things go wrong, the one who’s talents are ignored. I’ve never cut before but tonight I really want to. Everything that’s important to me is ignored, the only thing that gets me noticed is when I get pissed off and snappy, then they yell at me and I’m left crying, trying hard to explain. No one understands, they can’t see what’s going on! All they can see is a difficult and aggressive daughter, they never think to ask why, or how my day was, or if I’m okay, or if I want to talk about something or anything. They just yell and punish me. Im so misunderstood and underappreciated, I feel horrible living here and I really want to cut, let out some of this pain because all my other coping methods have been taken but I CAN’T! I have no knives or razors or scissors and Im left sobbing on the bed trying to convince myself not to commit suicide. I really need help!
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This sounds exactly like spmething I would write. Don’t cut though it’s incredibly stupid an there’s other ways to take your mind off of thing. Like listening to music and doiing hw and searching the web always get my mind off things… Im sorry you have togo theough thia too but i swear it will get better <3
you are worth so much more than the tears. you were put in this world for a reason and some times life is hard as hell and feels like its not worth living but i promise the sun will rise tomorrow and it will be better. you are someones reason to smile, dont take that away! you are worth so much more than people may make you feel like but everything you do, do it for YOU…no one else
though leaving feels like the easiest thing to do when its the end, dont. do the opposite put on a smile and tell yourself it will be okay because you are to strong to give up
please dont give up
Okay, look. just breathe. think about the positive things. i guarantee theres at least one thing worth living for. and if you cant think of anything, think harder. there is one. i promise. and trust me, i understand what its like to be ignored by your parents. to want to just curl up in a corner forever. but you have to teach yourself not to look at the negative side of things. teach yourself how to be happy. dont start self harm because when you do, you never stop. trust me. it only makes things worse. if you ever need me, im here. oliviakm@mil.com . and ill listen to everything and i will give my helpful opinion on what i think you could do to be happy again. surround yourself with the good things. search for things that make YOU happy. see the world for how beautiful it really is. tlk to your parents, or at least try to. they have to listen eventually. talk to someone professional, it helps. they make a difference. dont stress. stress makes everything complicated. suicide is never the answer. you have so much to live for. i want to be your friend. Please. Push suicide out of your mind. its not worth it.
oliviakm@mai.com **
im a fail .. oliviakm@mail.com **** … sorry. lol . talk to me <3
Might I recommend hating every second, instead of every second you spend at home? Because I once thought if I get away it would be better, but my problems just followed me every where I went.
Wednesday, did you call yourself ‘wednesday’ because you are a Wednesday (as in football) fan? or is just related to the day? Just wandering!
@sb, I take it you’re too young to move out?
Hi. I can’t say much because I’m also here for the same reason as you are but I haven’t given up hope yet. Taking everyday as it comes might be a good idea and the one thing I can definitely say is that on this site there are people who have or are going through very hard times and find life unbelievably difficult to cope with. So whatever you have said I know people can understand and associate with it in one way or another. If you want someone to talk to or share your problems then you can talk to me. Take good care of yourself.
P.s if you cut yourself you will leave yourself a scar which will remind you of this time for a very long time.