fighting

my dad and i got in a fight last night about my Spanish grade. i told him keeping my grades up is hard because i get stressed. he yelled at me for having a low tolerance for stress. he said to me back when i was a kid i can handle all you go through and more. but he never had to go through what i do. feeling worthless and stressed all the time, being picked on for being different, getting yelled at every night by a drunken asshole because he wants me to feel bad about myself. i used to like myself when i was little but now i cant even look in the mirror because i hate everything about myself. i hide under baggy clothes because i just want to disappear. i feel like I’m drowning all the time.  if i make it to 18 i want to be a counselor to help kids like me with problems. nobody deserves to feel this kind of pain.