Everyone is getting sick of me.
I’ve been in the exact same state since my breakdown over a month ago. I’ve made no progress. If anything I’m worse.
I’m trying so hard but I can’t move on. I hurt so much. People are sick of dealing with my weakness and I don’t blame them, I just don’t know what else to do. I need help pretty much 24/7. I’m a mess.
If I don’t talk to people, I feel worse and so lonely. But they’re tired of dealing with my issues.
I’ve had my exit planned for a while now. It’s all there and ready to go; I just need to do it.
I look at the future and it just seems so empty. I don’t want to go forward.
I just want all of this to stop now.
Its too much this time.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
3 comments
I know that’s why I stopped talking to people it hurts all the time this loneliness which is why I’d like to be friends cuz your on the same bout as me
I had a few breakdowns in December (I’m a 43 year old woman) and have felt EXACTLY as you’ve felt several times. Sometimes I feel like I need to stay alive for the people that support me, they “deserve” to not feel the pain of suicide (I’ve had two immediate family members who killed themselves and it devastates and fucks people up for…for ever, really). Sometimes I feel like it’d be better for them if I wasn’t around to be suck a DRAG and I’m not getting “better” fast enough. What I have found helpful is being brutally honest and separating fact from fiction. Write down FACTUAL statements from people where they request you off yourself so they can get on with life. Ain’t none. You want to stop the pain- it comes from within? Maybe you need better meds (just for now). I doubt anyone is “sick” of you. If someone loves you they feel helpless and stupid. Ask for their direct help, involve them in the process (instead of just venting). IT IS VERY VERY HARD TO STAY ALIVE but you can, for THIS day. ONE day.
Thankyou for your replies.
I know that people don’t SAY that they’re sick of me or that it’s getting too much, and that it’s probably just me being paranoid or concerned. Its just that they seem so tired of me and they DO seem helpless – I dont want them to but I can’t stop how I’m feeling.
I just so want this to be over now, the struggle has been too long and hard.
I think I do need to adjust my meds as I think they’re making me worse…
I think I’m going to see how things go for a few days and see what happens when I talk to my ex as this is all about him really, I guess. He was my best friend for seven years and I really want/need to have him in my life still – it’s all too complicated and messed up to get into. I’ll just see. It’s just so damn hard.