All of us here with our suicidal ideations and intentions (this post is not addressed to the wannabe saviours, bless their sweet souls) – I lurk and read, and i write and comment rather little, but I am here every day nonetheless. And the impression I’m getting is that, despite the fact that we are all weak in one way or another, some people discuss suicide from a position of strength and some from absolute vulnerability. The strong ones display vulnerability, but the vulnerable ones do not display strength. I’m not going to name names; I’m not even going to tell you which of those I imagine I am. It’s subjective and irrelevant. Just an observation, more line noise out here on the perimeter. This is for you, for us.
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Well there are different people with different temperaments and different reasons for wanting to consider suicide. So their is a similarity in all people who struggle with suicidal thoughts but all the conditions are not the same. just to give you an example. Some people struggle with suicidal thoughts because they are suffering an illness and disability and cant take the pain. Others struggle because they have lost everything in life and feel hopeless. Others might have an addiction to something that is casing them pain. Others might be being buied or absed at home or work or school. Others might have been abused in the past and keep reliving it over and over in their ind and cant see an end t it. Some people might just be bored with life and don’t see the point in going on or loneliness etc etc.
So each person who struggles with suicidal tendencies has a history behind them. A lifetime of issues or maybe just one huge issue on their plate right ow they cant deal with.
And trust me being suicidal is not always a sign of weakness I have know of some very srong people who faced amazing battles in their life but at some time they became suicidal over some issue or a combination of issues. Some people do it to get out of the ongoing pain that they are in. some people have painful disabilities.
uptown; some are facing ALL of those things.
Thank you for the line noise. As for me, my reasons seem to vary from day to day, minute to minute. One time I may read a post and it jars me to try to be the wanna be savior. The next moment I’m standing on the ledge wanting the exit.
It’s really hard to determine one’s level of strength or vulnerability from a few lines posted on the internet. It’s only a small glimpse at the big picture.
U r so right. I feel empowered in the knowledge that my own deliverance now lies in my own hands, and a time of my choice.
I now have the opportunity to straighten things out with my affairs and then at a time when I decide, I can remove myself from a society I have absolutely no impact on or appreciation for. Having had 3or 4 o/d failures before and a slash 18 months ago, I do feel perfectly calm and at ease with what I am going to do.
I’ve tried religious enlightenment, the tablets from my Dr simply give me jaw ache, I have explored every avenue. My check out time will happen when I decide and not in a fit of pique, and most importantly,will not impact on the lives of those I leave behind.
life isnt for everyone
So true