You’re Beautiful

Yeah, that’s right. You heard me. You’re beautiful. No matter what you think, you are. If no one has told you that today, then I will. Because you are. Sometimes it just takes the help of someone else to see that.

Today I was feeling pretty down this morning. It took the help of a friend to pick me up again. I suffer from depression and earlier this spring, I suffered my worst episode yet that ended with me calling the Suicide Hotline at twelve in the morning. Needless to say, I found out that there weren’t any actually resources to help me in my local area. I was completely alone.

I only made it through by my own determination not to take my life. I’m better now, but its still hard to keep going. I’ve learned that its easy to die and hard to live. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Life is hard. That’s the reality of it. Its something that I still have trouble grasping.

I learned in health and life the other day about the multiple facets that make a person truly happy. None of it is physical. Its all mental, being your social health, environmental, and so forth that make you up collectively and determine your state. It made me think about mine and my support system, which is zero to none. I’m worried that one day I’ll get to the point where no one will be there for me and I’ll take my life. Its scares the hell out of me.

Today though, a friend had my back. It seems almost by accident I came across this site tonight, so I figured I would return the favor. If you want, I’m always here to talk.

My biggest problem is that I don’t see a point to life, not really. I rarely feel enjoyment. I mostly trudge through it. But its like Gandhi said, ‘Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.’ And he’s right, its important we do it. Chase your hopes. Chase your dreams. Put yourself in the position to have a support system(which is what I’m working on), and aspire to become what you wish. Cut the negative parts from your life if possible and most importantly, keep moving. Even if you don’t want to. Its the only I got through my most recent bout of depression.

Anyway, I just wanted to say, to whoever may be feeling lonely or down, that you are beautiful and right now, there is something thinking about you. And I’m always here, for whoever needs help. I got your back =)