Here I am, don’t rock me like a hurricane, just hear me out. I have been dealing with some of the most difficult shit that I have ever had to deal with in my entire life and I am completely done with all of it. This life and this bullshit seriously arent worth the endless hours of agony and the energy that it takes to continue on.
At times I don’t even know who I am anymore. From one minute to the next it seems as though I am forced to deal with more drama, insanity, and childish crap than a middle school principal.
I have been in a relationship for almost 2 years now that has come down to me never knowing who I am with or who is going to pop into my life and what reason they are there. Either way, I end up getting the shit end of the stick and I am left holding nothing but bullshit in my hands.
I have foolishly feared that he has pracically had a complete and total relationship with someone else. The only difference between us is that she knows everything about me and them where I only know about my relationship with him. She comes to my window and knocks on the walls and all of that wonderful shit. She even goes as far as to call his name out at all hours of the night and she even gets to come into my house when I’m not home. It literally makes me sick to think that she has used my toilet, my shower and has even laid with him in my bed.
Now comes the complex part of all of this… according to my fiance all of this is happening in my head and in my head only. No one else hears any of the people talking outside or any of the knocking and tapping and so on that occurs. Everyone that does come around and has a chance to listen or help me reveal the truth are all his friends and family. Yeah, so like they are rae going to tell me if something is going on…..
And here I have saved the best for last… I have been informed by a professional that I have Multiple personality Disorder. Which means, who the hell am I and what the fuck is really going on? I swear, this will never get any easier. It seems as though there is only one thing that I know for certain, I love my man with everything in me and without him I would be no one. I owe him everything.