I’ve been disabling comments on my posts. Idk what anyone could say about my crazy rants. Also, I don’t know if he is coming back to visit me again with his mockery. Anyway. I’m going to show some courage today.
I hope you have a great day as well. I always told my mom and husband that I want a biodegradable casket and as little embalming as they can get away with. I know the law does require some embalming. I just want to go back to the earth. Let the worms and bugs take nourishment from me. The great circle of life. I loved reading your post.
Yes, that’s exactly what I want too… Let the worms and bugs take nourishment from me. My mom always says she doesn’t know what she would do if I died (I asked her). I don’t think she would like to follow my wish; she wants to be cremated and would probably want me to be cremated as well…
Hopefully she’ll decide to bury me.
Oh most peaceful of birthdays, M! I hope tomorrow you can push the pain away and have a profound moment of calm stillness where the smell of the wind, the caress if the sun, and the tempo of your heart are the only things that occupy your mind.
If I knew you in person I would buy you a small bouquet of lillies. They are beautiful and smell wonderful. Right now I have some on the kitchen table; the last buds should bloom tomorrow. I know now that when I drink my coffee tomorrow morning I will think of you and your hopefully tranquil twenty third birthday.
I don’t think there is a single state that requires embalming as long as you are not having a public viewing. There are some Quakers in the NE that sell cardboard caskets, too. There is no state that has a law requiring a certain kind of casket. All this is because federal regulators beat the crap out of the funeral industry in the 70s.
I have a cunning suicide plan that will make it seem as if I evaporated. No doubt this is due to the cleaning I had to do after my mom’s suicide. The blood was everywhere.
Your words…they are so beautifully written, but I can feel your pain in this post. Birthdays always seem to be a struggle when you’re depressed. Another year is said to be a blessing, but at times it can feel like a curse.
I’ve been feeling drained from life as well. Life is taking everything from us but it doesn’t want to give back. Our reward at the end of this journey is a mystery gift. Should we wait to open it or should we just open it now?
I apologize if I’m not be making much sense. I will be thinking of you tomorrow and I’ll be wishing for you to be able to enjoy your birthday tomorrow. You deserve so much happiness, you deserve everything because you are truly a beautiful person.
I love you my sister Tristeza. <3 Forever and always. ^__^
I think that tomorrow will be a cursed day… I haven’t been feeling well; especially if we’re talking about my emotional state. But who knows? I’m going to try to go out and forget about my problems for a few hours. Idk where I should go… I’m alone and I won’t have company tomorrow. I need to start thinking.
Don’t worry, everything you said makes sense <3
Thank you. I am indeed enjoying the silence right now; Saturday night and I’m reading old posts and thinking if I should delete some of mine again… Rebirths.
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I’ve been disabling comments on my posts. Idk what anyone could say about my crazy rants. Also, I don’t know if he is coming back to visit me again with his mockery. Anyway. I’m going to show some courage today.
I hope you all have a great day, suicidals.
I hope you have a great day as well. I always told my mom and husband that I want a biodegradable casket and as little embalming as they can get away with. I know the law does require some embalming. I just want to go back to the earth. Let the worms and bugs take nourishment from me. The great circle of life. I loved reading your post.
Thank you, vc333.
Yes, that’s exactly what I want too… Let the worms and bugs take nourishment from me. My mom always says she doesn’t know what she would do if I died (I asked her). I don’t think she would like to follow my wish; she wants to be cremated and would probably want me to be cremated as well…
Hopefully she’ll decide to bury me.
Oh most peaceful of birthdays, M! I hope tomorrow you can push the pain away and have a profound moment of calm stillness where the smell of the wind, the caress if the sun, and the tempo of your heart are the only things that occupy your mind.
If I knew you in person I would buy you a small bouquet of lillies. They are beautiful and smell wonderful. Right now I have some on the kitchen table; the last buds should bloom tomorrow. I know now that when I drink my coffee tomorrow morning I will think of you and your hopefully tranquil twenty third birthday.
Peace unto you, M, from another M: Matthew.
I don’t think there is a single state that requires embalming as long as you are not having a public viewing. There are some Quakers in the NE that sell cardboard caskets, too. There is no state that has a law requiring a certain kind of casket. All this is because federal regulators beat the crap out of the funeral industry in the 70s.
I have a cunning suicide plan that will make it seem as if I evaporated. No doubt this is due to the cleaning I had to do after my mom’s suicide. The blood was everywhere.
Thank you, Matthew. That would make me happy, I love lillies.
May
Your words…they are so beautifully written, but I can feel your pain in this post. Birthdays always seem to be a struggle when you’re depressed. Another year is said to be a blessing, but at times it can feel like a curse.
I’ve been feeling drained from life as well. Life is taking everything from us but it doesn’t want to give back. Our reward at the end of this journey is a mystery gift. Should we wait to open it or should we just open it now?
I apologize if I’m not be making much sense. I will be thinking of you tomorrow and I’ll be wishing for you to be able to enjoy your birthday tomorrow. You deserve so much happiness, you deserve everything because you are truly a beautiful person.
I love you my sister Tristeza. <3 Forever and always. ^__^
I think that tomorrow will be a cursed day… I haven’t been feeling well; especially if we’re talking about my emotional state. But who knows? I’m going to try to go out and forget about my problems for a few hours. Idk where I should go… I’m alone and I won’t have company tomorrow. I need to start thinking.
Don’t worry, everything you said makes sense <3
Thank you, hiohneh. Ily too {= ^w^ =} meow <3
Remember to have fun on your birthday! Go out and get some cheesecake or something. ^^
The cake shop owner always closes the doors when he sees me around *sugar addict*
That just gave me a flashback to French films and movies based in France, like Chocolat – have you seen it?
Are we talking about Johnny Depp? (;
Yes, he’s in that one, haha.
Happy birthday
Enjoy the silence.
Thank you. I am indeed enjoying the silence right now; Saturday night and I’m reading old posts and thinking if I should delete some of mine again… Rebirths.
Lol I typed Friday instead of Saturday…*sigh*