I’ve been depressed since I was 7. I’m tired of always being tired, and sad, and depressed, and feeling shitty about myself, my life, just everything. I’m just a giant black ball of darkness… I’m tired of being tormented, of always being in pain. I wish I was “normal” and had a “normal” life and felt happy good feelings, instead of feeling like I’m dying all the time…
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I totally relate to this post, felt like an outsider as long as I’ve had memories
Have you ever seen Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Except in my case, my bad memories are 80% of me, so I’d need to basically wipe out all of me.
I keep hoping that they will one day invent a pill that can selectively erase memories ..
sadly not in my lifetime tho. And in my case, I’d need to erase basically 80% of me -_-‘
What do you do when you wish you were never born? And you don’t want to kill yourself only because you’ve struggled so hard to survive for all these years??
Probably not in mine either and I’m only 23, I keep hoping I could physically stay 23 too the thought of old age even past thirty depresses me I wish I was never been born too the pain has only got worse with age as I become more and more self aware
Also what’s sunshine of a spotless mind?
It’s a great movie for us “troubled” people. It’s about a world where you can “erase” any bad or sad memories you want removed, hence the title, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
And Kate Winslet has blue hair. Mmm… Kate Winslet…
Yeah, there’s no upside to getting older. Just. No.
Let’s not put 30 in the “old age” category just yet. I’m in my 30s… -_-‘
I’ve heard a lot of people say the older you get the easier it is to not give a shit and I feel mentally old at 23 and I don’t really think thirty is old 🙂 funny think is there’s also a part of me that feel like a kid in an adults body
Lol thirty felt old to me. I didn’t even plan to be alive this long! I was gonna go out in a hail of bullets or something, “taken too soon” and all that. I never planned for this! What is this? This… decade between youth and serious middle age? What the fuck do I do with it? Where the fuck did my twenties go? I’m too old to have fun now. Fuuuuuck.
That’s not true for me. Everything still hurts like sh*t.
Lol, to a “old” person like me, 23 IS a kid. Wish I was young and healthy again. -_-‘
There are huge upsides to getting older. There are no upsides to acting old.
Name them 🙂 I’m intrigued
Tempered empathy
Bullshit detection/mind reading
I’ve seen this before/clairvoyance
Patience
Massive home improvement skill sets
Not easily surprised
Zero angst of youth
Sex
Really cheap car insurance
Voice of authority
Practiced and polished communication skills
Knowing all the punchlines
Not sweating the small stuff and you really know what the small stuff is
Nobody asks you what you’re going to be when you grow up
Ive heard this before/Good liar
Pretty long list 🙂
“Here today and expected to stay on and on and on. I’m tired. I’m tired…” ~ Elliott Smith
What is the reason of your depression? After telling the reason, maybe we will be able to help you..
sometime there is no peculiar reason to depression but a multiple factors + GENETIC ( ye that fucking *****) that make your brain snap for nothing , i was depressed since 7-8 ( i remember myself drawing pictures of me fantasizing about killing myself …………) and just grew up like that and thought that was normal for me to be that way and ” different” , over the years , i m now 24 my depression knew without knowing and became unbearable with suicide “pulses” and almost all off the severe depression symptoms -_- ……. i m now trying to do my best to cure with help AD ( with no effect for now ) and thinking about ect to be healed and finally be normal ……. eitheir way if my depression stays with all of this , i know for sure that i’ll kill myself and i m already ready for it ………. so fucking tired living with mental illness that prevent me for being myself and “enjoy life” ……….