Im angry at you but i can’t think of why. The only thing is because you’re not answering me. You’re not wondering where i am or bothering to check in.
I’m trying very hard to stop myself getting mad and you.
Im angry at you but i can’t think of why. The only thing is because you’re not answering me. You’re not wondering where i am or bothering to check in.
I’m trying very hard to stop myself getting mad and you.
So is this what being an adult is like?… relentless anxiety and stress about making ends meet and keeping up with society’s pressures. The constant feeling that you have no balance or time. Any moment you do get to ‘stop’, you’re only tortured by your own mind. If not that, then you feel numb and empty.
(Im 28 but matured late)…
I was watching a cake decorating show today thinking: ‘ how could anyone enjoy spending hours on intricate details of a cake when they know its going to get cut up, eaten and digested by someone soon after.
Cake decorators must be […]
I love you.
But i dont trust you.
Dont take it personally.
I dont trust anybody.
My boyfriend told me he was thinking about suicide for quite some time after his wife cheated, divorce, being in debt. He’s told me doesnt think too much about (our) future and he’s at the stage where he just wants to take each day as it comes and not stress..
he’s turned his life around and he seems happy and content. Im happy for him..
But im not. Im utterly depressed and secretly wanting to die. I secretly hate his new life. Nothing horrible has happeend to me im just fucked im the head. My self esteem is rock bottem. I hate myself all the time. […]
I wish ending it was as easy as flicking a switch.
Objectively, my life isnt even that bad. I’ve still managed to create my own vortex of emptiness, lonliness and misery. I dont know any different. I cant even describe it.. I want to just shrivel up and disappear. The world wouldnt miss me.
Would you confront your boyfriend if you think he had developed some feelinhgs for a new female friend? He looked really jealous when she was cuddling up with HER boyfriend?
I feel like im always paranoid about this and seeking reassurance from him. I dont know if it will do any good?
I messed up today. My internal dialogue was “i hate myself”
And then i felt sorry for myself so i decided to do one of my favourite things.. hiking.
I feel so insignificant to my boyfriend. I feel more like his housemate then a best friend or lover.
Maybe i crave more attention and affection from my relationships than he does?
I feel like he loves his phone more than me. Why cant, instead of talking to everyone else, he puts the phone down and connects with me?
I would rather be with a loner who gets jealous …than someone who speak with everyone and doesnt have time for me.
Just went to see a psychologist yesterday. Complete waste of time! A horrible experience . It felt like an interrogation. He was asking me all these personal questions with no empathy, validation. No emotiobal response at all.
I cant believe this guy still has clients!!
I’m having doubts about my relationship. It’s not the racisism. Its the being divorced. Ive told him he should go talk to someone cause he’s still so .. broken. Theres still so much anger and resentment. im feeling like I’m fucking third wheeling a dead marriage.
It wasnt until 4 months into our relationship that i found out he was married before. I didn’t find out in a nice way either. But i was already in love with him and I wanted to be the calm relaxed girlfriend so i didnt say anything. I could see that he was ashamed and didnt want to tell me. Again, it took another 8 months before i find out he was still actually married.
I wish i did get angry because im still not over the fact he didnt tell me. In all honesty, i wouldnt have continued dating him if he had told me […]
I feel so ashamed of myself. How i reacted. Behaved. Im sorry that im so messed up. That i have ‘issues’. I wish i was normal. Normal for you. I wish i wasnt so fragile. So sensitive. I try really hard just sometimes i can’t hide it. It just comes out. I feel like a freakshow. I feel that people are judgeing me.. thinking I’m weird. Theres soemthing wrong with me. They dont like me. They avoid me because i make them feel comfortable they hate me. How do i get myself out of this loop.
The root of my depression and anxiety is my insecure attachment.
I’m in a new relationship but am still so insecure. He tells me he loves me and wants to be with me but I’m so insecure and making myself miserable by constantly thinking about him leaving me or flirting with other women. I keep thinking he doesn’t really love me .. that he’s ‘settling’ for me and that he likes his female friend or regrets divorcing his ex wife and hasnt got over her.
I had a manipulative ex who, for example, would post up inappropriate pics with him and girls. It was only […]
I was prescribed oxalate/escitalopram a few years ago but dont take it now because it would kill any drive and numbs everything.
When i was single i didnt care. It improved my mood and made me feels heaps better.
I’m in my late twenties and in a relationship now and I can’t afford to not enjoy sex!! I struggle enough getting everything to work when the time arises ( if you get my meaning 😉 LOL) but, on the meds, he might as well be fucking my toes because i wouldnt feel anything.
Is there another antidepressant that doesnt do this. Maybe i can play around with […]
It just brings pain. That’s all there is. Pain in one way or another. And when you’re not in pain you’re just trying to distract yourself from ruminating about times when you were in pain and how painful it was. Now youre suddenly in pain again.
Death would be so much easier then the utter inconvenience of being born and having to live.
Im just wondering how do i make online friends? Like penpals kinda thing
Im a nice person. I’m just not very nice to myself.. or people that i feel threatened by. Which could possibly be everyone i come into contact with during my day haha.
I just want people who i feel comfortable saying “im having an absolute shit day today, what are you up?” People who d ask questions and show interest
A good dream for me is one where I’m going to die. Not necessarily where im going to kill myself.
Obviously i cant continue a dream once im dead. But the theme is always the same. I have a way out
I watch people dying in movies.. or in real life on the news etc.. and i feel.. envious. I think “lucky bastard”
I know this is horrible cause they dont want to be in this position. And knowing my luck i would probably feel the same if i ACTUALLY was in their position.
But i cant help it. I see them die. And i secretly wish i was them or i wish to trade places with them.
Does anyone else get this?
So it just occured to me that the situation at the moment that is causing me grief… i have absolutely no control over. They could go ahead and screw me over and it would be completely beyond my control.
So ive narrowed it down to just my thoughts. So i might as well drink to distract myself. To depress my thoughts. Lol not helpful i know 🙁
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