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For general topics related to the site.

Fucking wheels

by Dollycutter 8/27/2014

written by Dollycutter

I’ve decided to live so what do I do next? I got the closest to succeeding that I ever have. And maybe if he hadn’t knocked on the door I would have fixed my initial error and went. It scared me though and I feel ashamed of myself as I always do. I can’t leave my kids like that.
Since I have decided that suicide is not an option I feel even more trapped than I did. These cycles are killing me. It’s like being rolled downhill in a tractor tire.
If […]

8/27/2014 5 comments

Never Call a Girl Fat Even if You’re Joking

by alyssa_cries14 8/27/2014

written by alyssa_cries14

We all have those moments where we just want to die. This was a feeling that I had that was stronger than ever. Since I was a little girl, I was fat and I have been called fat. I’m not gonna lie…it hurt badly. It made me feel terrible. Those beautiful girls out there were skinny, so where does that leave me? I cried and cried myself to sleep sometimes because I was ugly and fat. As I got older, it was worst. You were judged all the time, whether if it was how pretty you were, what was your weight, or the clothes you […]

8/27/2014 12 comments

bad day

by paingoaway 8/27/2014

written by paingoaway

been a while since i been here. hope everyone is doing ok, or at least staying alive. I hate having suicidal thoughts…but here they are tonight, first time in a while. im quite lonley, and i need a better job, or my gf might leave me. I already only have one friend. crap, im scared of being homeless,in jail, or dead. maybe as a 29 year old black male without a good job (although very educated) i have just seen all the good i will ever see in life? maybe…i should just take the easy way out. i hope this mood passes quickly.

8/27/2014 13 comments

Empty

by AJokeOfFate 8/27/2014

written by AJokeOfFate

I just.. I feel so empty. Yeah, normally its easy to laugh it off and hide behind a mask, act normal, human even. But right now, when I’m sitting at home and in bed, all of my walls come down. I feel so weak and hopeless- and of course my parents choose this very moment to tell me how worthless I am and how I’ll never amount to anything and how I should have been more like my brother. The worst part? I agree with them.
I’m not anything special; I don’t have any outstanding talents- and trust me on this. I can read people […]

8/27/2014 10 comments

desire

by sunflower 8/27/2014

written by sunflower

The feeling when youre holding a razor in your hand, tears pouring down your face and youre just staring at it… so close to relief, so close to that feeling you used to rely on. My arms are starting to tingle again burn and ache wanting to feel the slice of the blade and see the blood first pool then trickle down my arm. but he texted me… as if he felt the need to contact me. maybe it was a coincidence. maybe ill still cut tonight. god i really wantto cut but if he were here with me i would settle for his sweet […]

8/27/2014 0 comment

I’m an Ugly Duckling

by TwistedSpace 8/27/2014

written by TwistedSpace

I guess I was destined to be this ugly. In my last post, I mentioned wanting to punch my mirror into a bunch of tiny pieces. Part of that has to do with how unbearably ugly I feel. In my opinion, I look like a monkey. My ex called me a trap, which is a term for Tran people who look completely believable as their desired gender. I don’t know. Others say I look cute, gorgeous, like a model, even. I just don’t see it. What do you think?

8/27/2014 14 comments

not sure what happened

by defeatedcreek1 8/27/2014

written by defeatedcreek1

I have suffered from depression and anxiety for many years now. I usually never thought of my current situation as being that depressing though. I’m on active duty and my duty station of the last 2.5 years has been the worst, but in the last year I felt like I made the most of it.

Yet, earlier this week, I realized that I do not value life. I don’t value mine. I don’t necessarily de-value the lives of others (I’m NOT homicidal) but the idea of losing people no longer fazes me. I’m really numb to grieving at this point.

My life is not upwardly mobile. I […]

8/27/2014 4 comments

Alone

by mental-anguish 8/27/2014

written by mental-anguish

I often wonder how we can be so alone in this overpopulated world??? Such a sad existence once you survive the unsurvivable! Everyone/everything you once knew continues on like you were never there. We are so insignificant alone!!! 1 more day closer to the end, so curious to see what happens yet so reluctant. Goodnight world!!!

8/27/2014 2 comments

My glass can’t get any more empty

by empty glass 8/27/2014

written by empty glass

I am 56, soon 57 in a few weeks. I am lonely. I have a 25 year old son, who hardly ever comes to visit me. A woman lived with me for many years. She was my girlfriend. I found out that she cheated on me twice. That day I found out, she came home, but I told her that I wouldn’t give her any more chances, and to pack up her things and remove them from my house and leave, because I did not want to be cheated on anymore. It hurt me to do this to her, but it hurt even more being […]

8/27/2014 7 comments

Everything && Anything

by Kailee3 8/27/2014

written by Kailee3

I’ve started counceling the other week, and the second session she asked me why i cannot keep eye contact with anyone.. I didn’t explain to her why .. once somebody told me it kills them to look into my eyes because all they see is pain.. She also began to tell me i have created a well put together mask and she cannot figure it out. I don’t believe i need to go to counceling, I have nothing to talk to her about. Am i suppose to sit there and tell her how constantly i plan out my suicide, how perfectly it is put […]

8/27/2014 3 comments

life’s choice s affect everyone u know

by bryan higgins 8/27/2014

written by bryan higgins

Some time life’s great tell you realized your quest in life Is Worth it but only to you .in the end do people really care about u .or were u just part of a lust full delusion of an illusion. I’m happy in life and have no real issues to speak of ..but I feel like seeing what’s in my next life .

8/27/2014 0 comment

Empty Within

by Scarlett Dawn 8/27/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I feel empty inside
There’s a void I cannot fill
I drink the emptiness away
I smoke the emptiness away
I roll to take the emptiness away

Though these temporary solutions
Hold no effect once I be sober
I miss the touch of a gentle human hand
I miss the warmth of another’s embrace
I miss the smile that follows the sweet words spoken
I miss being loved by another

I curl up and hold myself tight at night
My pillow squished in my comforting embrace
I close my eyes and dream of a paradise
One where a man adores me for me
Holds me and tells […]

8/27/2014 6 comments

Searching for a new friend

by pasdespoir 8/27/2014

written by pasdespoir

So I ended up here because I thought I might meet people who think and feel like me.

Every single post makes me feel as if it was mine. But the thing is that here or in real life I’m not able to confront my fears of being rejected and meet new people.

So I thought maybe if I stated my centers of interests I might meet someone who share them.

1. I’m a BIG HUGE fan of Ken Follett.

2. I’m a pianist and I love music above everything else (not only classical but also rock and alternative, my favourite band being Coldplay)

3. I love reading and building […]

8/27/2014 11 comments

Nightmare

by RoseDavidson 8/27/2014

written by RoseDavidson

I don´t know how I ended up like this.

I feel like I don´t have anyone. Anyone I can hug or touch, just to feel the warmness of the body of someone else. Everybody leaves me. I can´t sleep at nights. I lay in my bed and listen how drops of rain are colliding with my window, thinking about all the people that left me behind continuing in their way and I stayed, like glued to the ground with no chance to move on. Someone would say I finally get used to people leaving me. But everytime it´s getting worse and worse. And I, like an […]

8/27/2014 11 comments

The emptiness and numbness

by alina_01 8/27/2014

written by alina_01

It comes back and just consumes me and even when I try to feel I can’t. I feel empty and I’m alone I should feel sad but instead I feel nothing. Ugh it is the most annoying thing ever! I watched a movie recently, one of those rare weird movies that people typically don’t tend to watch. And I made such a connection I felt understood like I could understand, of course on certain levels because not each person and situation is the same. But I shared a similar pain and it sucks and im so numb this very second that I don’t care enough […]

8/27/2014 1 comment

i hate myself

by insecure-wreck 8/27/2014

written by insecure-wreck

My Body is hurting like crazy I hope my pain has a limit because I’m so tired of it all damn muscles spasms n it’s too much pain I have pills but I choose not to take them my spine n back feel like the springs on a slinky going forward I have a few friends I like to chat with n to maybe help me to get better in a way by making me laugh n at times I just don’t know whether I want to just throw in the towel n say I’m done with life it seems I’ve been waiting […]

8/27/2014 2 comments

another day failed

by kateralia 8/27/2014

written by kateralia

Yet another day has passed & I have failed. Or is it life has failed me?

What is the point in trying if all you do is fail.

I’ll never have another partner, I’ll never have a family. I’ll never afford another car, I’ll never travel again. I’m stuck in this one place, in this glass box that I can see out of but noone can see me. I’ll wither away in this empty box, never having what my soul yearns for most.

8/27/2014 11 comments

The sadness will never end

by Grimmjow 8/27/2014

written by Grimmjow

To begin i must be honest and say i had no intention of sharing this with someone else but it keeps eating me inside.I was always a shy kid and i didn’t have many friends.I am always getting bullied at school i even tried talking to someone about this but nothing changes the other kids that bully me got angrier.It was the day that they locked me our school’s closet bleeding with a broken nose that i realise that i must have done something wrong.I keep trying to fight this but the sadness and the frustration of nobody loving you and nobody hearing no matter […]

8/27/2014 3 comments

tonight

by lovemyshihtzu 8/27/2014

written by lovemyshihtzu

I’m planning on it. girl at work gave me whole bottle of caffeine pills. didn’t know I’m suicidal. stole some vodka from my dad’s liquor cabinet. tied noose…. I’m so done.

8/27/2014 12 comments

what went wrong

by DeadGirlNotFound 8/27/2014

written by DeadGirlNotFound

it all started when i was ten.. my relationship with my parents was horrible, i started rebelling, cutting myself for the pain i felt, nobody loved me back then, my mom emotionally abused me 24*7, every moment at home felt like forever, it was hard.my dad was so controlling, he would scare me with his voice, and behaviour, he took away my phone, my stuffs, called me a dirty hoe. my mom and dad would fight, and scream, and she would threaten him that she will leave the house,or they will get separated. my mom also threw plates at me many times. we lived in […]

8/27/2014 1 comment

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