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Not too much to say except, I came a long way but never really reached that mountain top. It’s a long way down the hill now and all my dreams lay dead below.
I’ve never really met anyone like me. I feel trapped in my own head. I can be so superficial, really, to be honest. And I am ashamed of it. I don’t know if  there could have ever been any other way for me, but I remember it all started by trying to scape the pain I was feeling. Movies kept me alive in a far away land where beautiful girls were loved for […]
Ok–I’ve been on this earth for 45 years. Im in decent shape & until I lost my job made a decent living. For the past 30 years I have been building up my courage to commit suicide. At various points in my life I have tried suicide. Cutting, sleeping pills and have thought of running my car into a truck (but why ruin some strangers life) so I have not done that. Many people have told me that life gets better. By living I have proven that hypothisis wrong. My point of this post is to state that were I sucessful in my first attemp when I was […]
I try so hard to get my life back on track. It seems that whenever good happens in my life something 10X worst follows: i just can’t get a break. I don’t really have any friends, I’ve never had a girlfriend nor could I ever hope to future with one since I started going bald and became impotent at 22 and now I’m 26, even cialis doesn’t work. I’m studying a field that I’m not passionate and nearly flunked out my first year. I did better my following years but it will nearly impossible to get into grad school. I still live with my parents […]
How people easily believe that we’re doing fine when we are smiling.
sometimes we just get tired of pretending ..
Crying doesn’t help..
Screamin out loud ..no one hears us..
drinkin..it’ll only knock us out for a while..
Cutting, make a body art.. it’s gettin painless..
we’re all alone in this world..
i am feeling suicidal right now and i feel like i might really end it tonight or mabey just wait a few days to say goodbye and see if this what i want.. i was scared at first because i was scared to die i realize now i am not scared anymore that we are all going to die eventually that we do not live forever but i feel like i have finally accepted that its okay to die and i know how i would die so it would make it less scary <3 can anyone help me right now?
The constant reminders ” What you feel is a sin , and you will burn in hell” Well , this night may be the one night where this wrong feels so right. You wish that i was dead , you will get your wish… Because i will stop fighting the wrong – Because this wrong doesn’t feel right – It is right..
It’s been quite a long time since I’ve been on here,
Life still continues to pass me by. I met a girl who I have been involved with for around 9 months now.
I have learnt a lot about her.. Heck I even love her. I didn’t think I would meet anyone again at least not after the relationship I was in prior..
She’s changed from the girl I originally met back in December. She isn’t the girl I fell in love with..
She dismisses my feelings like they are just disposable. She’s sent my heart into a deep abyss, of darkness, anger and hate.
I have so much uncertainty […]
I’m sick of being everyone’s second choice – everyone’s shoulder to cry on.
You can’t use me when it’s convenient for you.
I feel like I was born and bred to be a shoulder to cry on… And I spend almost all my time alone trying to comfort myself.
If anyone needs a shoulder to cry on, I guess I’m here… Here to be convenient for you. I know you won’t appreciate it, but you’re welcome.
You know I’m going to be here, even when I don’t want to be. Because I’m predictable.
🙂
I just discovered this website and reading some of ya’ll’s posts called out to me and made me want to write stuff down. So why not do it for you people, someone who gets what im going through.
In less than 2 months I’ll be 22 years old. I’ve been thinking about suicide since i was 12. Depression and anxiety have been a part of my life since I was a baby. I remember being 4 or 5 years old, and feeling anxious and unsafe all the time. I grew up in a home where fighting, co-dependency, depression and hysteria was considered normal so I didn’t […]
Hi. I’ve never really done this before. I’m a thirteen year old girl. I used to have these huge dreams of changing the world, being someone. I still do, but it’s harder to continue. I have nothing wrong with my life. I have a good home life, things at school are okay I guess, no one has it perfect. I don’t know why, but I can’t stop thinking about cutting and committing suicide. I feel like it would be so much easier. Sleeping with out dreams eternally. I don’t know why I want life to end so badly. Lately I’ve been in my room a […]
i know im sick. i have made my stomach so small that a cracker fills me up all day but ive been trying to eat more..not going so well:/ i cant focus on anything cuz im dizzy my vision is spotty im weak and freezing always…everytime i stand up i feel crazy light headed, everytime i breathe it hurts (thats gone on for 3 months) and then i cut a lot more and deep too…suicide is my number one thing on my mind lately…i used to be not tobad…but this doesnt feel right…idk yet but i might see if i can go get help now. […]
Power is a filthy poison
for which there is no cure
It steals the soul and taints the life
and can make one quite impure.
Power vibrates in the beast
its sanity has gone
now it bleeds and weeps of greed
and thinks there is no wrong.
So take your need and power’s lust
and choose your victims wise
Scream your battle cry aloud
and shape your prey’s demise.
Demean the different, out and in
and make their life a hell
Carve wounds with words into their soul
and in your hate they dwell.
Destroy those who oppose your will
with shouts and strikes and sin
Claim that […]
What is so ugly about me,
that I’m in my Junior year.
And have never been to a big party?
I’ve read so many of the stories on here, and I feel that I should write mine, too. Although it isn’t as bad as others, it got me where I am.
Two years ago, my friend confessed to cutting herself. I was devastated, and all I wanted was to be there for her. I didn’t want her to do it anymore, I wanted her to be okay. So I stayed up late for her, and I was her personal therapist for a while. This was when i was 12 years old.
My mum fell pregnant and I cried for the whole weekend. I was already neglected and […]
Hello everyone.
My name is Belle. I have never been on here before but I’ve been observing Miss Kyu for a while and I decided  why not try it out just for the hell out of it? Seems fun enough. I am miss kyu’s darker and more hated side. She hates me. Haha. But she has no choice but to want and need me. Where else will she push all her regrets and negative emotions? Today is her birthday, she hates her birthday. So it’s a day where she runs away and lets me out for some fresh air. All day, both of us have been […]
Well, today school got too much for me and I made myself sick so I got to go home. When I was sitting with my mum, we got onto the topic of suicide somehow, (she doesn’t know I’m suicidal) and she said that people who commit suicide are selfish. Do you know how much that stabbed me? I can only think of what she would think if I ever plucked up the courage to do it.
But in my view, not that it matters, people who commit suicide aren’t selfish at all. They’re miserable, and they’re trapped. They need an out and they find one. If […]
Things were supposed to get better. I’ve made great friends here on SP and even have a ‘special someone’ in my life.
But of course, last night it all came crashing down. There are no words to describe how broken I am now. My heart aches more than it ever has. I’m tired of hurting people. My life will never let me be ok. I’m back to the mirror and I hate standing here. I hate looking at this person. I’m crying so hard I can barely breathe. I’m dirty again and now I have the blood of the only people I had left on my […]
Have you ever had a moment where you’re just thinking, not about anything in particular.. and those innocent thoughts take a nasty turn? Next thing you know you’re talking yourself out of hurting yourself. Moments of insanity I like to call them. When something in your head shifts ever so slightly and everything you’ve stuffed and hidden inside for twenty years tries to get out? It over loads the brain and you just want to make it stop. You’d do anything for the memories and the pain to leave.
I’ve never been able to fully tell anyone the whole story. Why not a bunch of random […]