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the teacher told us to bring somethings for are cooking class,but i accidently bought only one thing.my classmate scolled at me,and suddenly she whisper to her frieinds thinking i coudn’t hear it but she was wrong..I hear it all,,she told her friend that i was dumb and useless,,i wanted to cry but i force myself not to cry..
it started on the 2nd grade.heard gossips,but i didn’t mind at all cause i thought it woudn’t last.But it didn’t,,it turn out to be worst,cause even my friends betrade me..until all of them were gone..i experience the bullies..until i reached gr. 6th,,i feel lyk i want to kill myself,but i can’t,,so i jxt sat on my room thinking..sometimes i bump my head on the wall a 10 tyms and think y do ppol hate me..sometimes i feel alone,useless and a loser..It really hard,i tried to have new friends but they turn out to be the same,,if i lost a friend i would cry so […]
Right now I’m only living because I am alive.To not waste what I consider a magnificent oportunity to discover,feel and enjoy everything that moves your heart.Yet no matter how hard I look,no matter how hard I search,I can’t find the rope to guide me trough the maze.I feel so alone…Everyone around me seem so far away,like I was in a different dimension overlaping his one but I couldn’t be touched.I can’t find what moved my heart anymore.Everyday seem wasted.I think: “If I was going to do nothing again,I should have stayed in bed”…Worthless chatter “It’s finaly geting hot outside!”…”I love the cold…”.Everybody looks at me […]
i don’t know why i decided that writing everything down was a good idea. let along on the internet. i guess on here nobody knows who i am and its not somewhere where somebody from my end can find it.
i am a selfharmer/suicidal. have been since i was about 16. i am now nearly 20. it started when my bestfriend died in a car accident. i started self distructing a couple months later. i could not get over her death. then somebudy noticed, a teacher, he threatened to go to the school welfare co-ordinator unless i talked to him. so i chose to talk to […]
I am just so exhausted… So utterly exhausted. It’s never going to change .. I don’t think I will ever change I think I’m just always gunna be fucked up. I’m just so tired , so tired of it. I’m so tired of always being tired but not getting to sleep at night like I desperately need all day, so tired of no motivation to do anything . I’m tired of always being sick from lung infections to strep throat, always on a new medication , it never seems to stop. I’m tired of being moody, and freaking out over the littlest things than right […]
when i was 8, i was sexually abused. my mom was an alcoholic almost my whole life, my dad abanded me when i was so young, came back around in my life when i was 15 and choose his new family over his kids. my “best friends” put my secrets all overs facebook to use it against me when we got into a fight. we made up, but i havent fully forgaven them because i have horrible trust issues. im in love with my best friend, and we almost were together BUT of course she found someone better. my whole life ive been made fun of for […]
I have never been more serious in committing suicide. I want to move on. I want to get away from everything. I know I need help. I’m dying for help, literally. These past months have been bullshit for me. I’ve been depressed lately. I get frustrated easily, and wind up crying. Everytime. Even for the most silliest things. I have my own death planned out. I know how I’m going to do it, but honestly, I do not want to die. I just want the pain to stop, I want everything to stop, and if killing myself is the best way out for me, then […]
I am so angry with myself, I just want this to stop. I’m mad that I could be like this. I get really angry with my loved one I don’t even mean too … Than shortly after I’m crying about it cause I feel like such a fucking asshole . How can I get so angry with something so stupid, why is every little thing that he does or that happens have to get to me? I want it to change but I don’t know how to control it, and I try to tell him I have no control but he can’t understand because he […]
I can’t do it anymore. I’m just fucking tired. I’m tired of having to wake up everymorning and pretend that everything is okay. People say that in not alone, then why do I feel like I am alone? I just hate everything. People judge me and they don’t even know a thing about me or half the things I’ve been through. I just want to get away from everything…just away from the world. Months past and I still feel the same way. They say everything will get better soon, years has past and it’s gotten worse. The pain has gotten worse. I try putting a […]
Its the wrong kind of place to be thinking of you…
I’m so mentally clusterfucked and I dont know what to do or think right now.. the worst I’ve fallen in almost a year and I dont even know why. All I can do is bury my head and want to cry.. too bad my heart is too bruised to shed a tear like they used to.
Not even sure why I’m posting here. I guess I want to know if anyone feels the same as me, what do I do etc.
I basically can’t seem to handle life. I was booted from home when I was 14. Apparently a bad situation with neighbours caused us to move when I was 11 and according to my mother this unsettled me in my life. I was a stable, well achieving girl before that.
Now I am 32. I have had strings of bad relationships, one after the other. Ending for reasons which may or may not have been my […]
I’m sooo tired of it all!! Don’t know what to do anymore! Can’t even stand to look in the mirror, I don’t know how much more I can take. Â I cry all the time now, can’t even get through one day without crying. My husband always asks if i’m okay, but the truth is, he really doesn’t wan’t know the answer to that question. I don’t know why he even bothers asking. I wanna believe he loves me, but I don’t know how. I feel as though everyone would be happier and better off if I were gone. Â I really believe they would all jump […]
My energy is still gone, but I’m going to hang on. Maybe my story will save a life someday.
Hey this is my uhh.. first post thing. And this is new too me because I’ve never felt this way. I mean I had a bad life but never realized it was this bad. What’s the point? I have no meaning. The whole town hates me and I get bullied because I wear my heart on a sleeve plus I’m the tallest kid at my school and get bullied for not doing sports. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m out of moves…
I swear theres no way to describe how worthless i feel. can I die? like can someone kill me ?
Im completely done. I can’t take this anymore. everyone hates me, I m an awful friend and i ruin everything. people die everyday is it hat hard for me to die today. I have nothing sharp, nor rope, nor meds. what am I supposed to do. I don’t cry. but I can’t handle it anymore. I ruin everything.why am i so bad? why?
to die. So I’m pretty sure I’m done I am very serious but can’t become 100% certain. I can’t function around people, I have been deeply depressed for around 7 years, My motivation in life is to hurt those who hurt me nothing more and nothing less. I have no real goals or dreams in life, I have been on alot of medication, tried everything, have no reason to live and am almost sure I am incapable of love or happiness or even being content. I don’t want to live in any society and I wont do anything I don’t want to. I don’t want […]
I’m constantly asked for reasons to keep on living. But I can think of many more to just die right here.
Who’s actually going to miss you? Friends acknowledge it and move on, as do family. The goverment might miss you as it is one less person to get tax from.
It’s considerably more a selfless act than a selfish one. Think about strangers you walk past and are around every day. Wouldn’t life be easier if there was one less **** in your way?
It’s a human right to live, and another to die.
What about colleagues? Have you ever had someone that was dragging you down or […]
What is the whole point of living anyways? When you get to the point where all you feel is numbness and pain, why should you go forth in life? When every waking moment of your life you unintentionally hurt the people who are supposed to love you, why not end their pain? It would be selfish of me if I continued to live. My death it seems is inevitable, the people who are closest to me all know that at some point I will end my life. So why not end the pain now? I’m tired of pretending to live, when in truth, I already […]
another reason i want to die is because my family hates me every time something goes wrong they blame it on me and punish me and if they find out its my brother or my sister they don’t say sorry to me and they don’t punish my brother or sister . i feel like im not wanted all the time.and my dad thinks im just a problem and constantly reminds me that he hates me and doesn’t want me.and the only one that likes me is my sister and she just got married so shes not going to be there fore me.well if what my whole family wants is me to be gone […]
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