General

For general topics related to the site.

0

Its all about timing

April 15th, 2006by TehCo2didit

I was going to write a story like so many before me detailing my previous suicide attempt and how I failed at even that but my story isnt worth retelling.

My life has been one of deprivation, whether it was food, clothes or an education I’ve missed out on pretty much all of it. I did get my state funded high school certificate though, yay me. Essentially I’ve reached a point now where im unemployable, I have skills and abilities and an intense drive to succeed in whatever I do yet with these attributes still no one will give me a chance.

For the past …

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0

Large Dose of Pills

March 31st, 2006by abyssrider

Well, I am on this site reading people’s situations and just can’t seem to find one similiar to mine whatsoever. I am 27 years old and I am completely lost in oblivian. I still have a huge scar running down my arm from when I tried to kill myself at 13 years old. Since then I have attempted suicide twice. Once I took about 100 aspirins when I was 15 and would have died but my mother found my suicide note in my room. My last attempt was when I was 20. I took an entire bottle of welbutrin. I was rushed to the hospital …

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Don’t know why but I hold on…

March 4th, 2006by a_secret

I don’t know what I’m doing on this website. I’m not the kind of person Lifetime would want to make a movie about. I’m optimistic, I’m hopeful, I’m happy. I’m the kind of person that makes my mother sick when SHE’S depressed because I glow. But the truth is, the heart of man is such a complex thing. Here I am wanting to make something of myself, wanting to live a good life. Wanting to do something for others. I grew up in Christianity and for the early parts of my life it gave me the only hope I had. But now without that, now …

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5

Life?

January 15th, 2006by anon

To everyone who’s posted on this blog –

I’ve read some of the entries, and I’ll finish reading the rest once I get the time.

I’m depressed too. I was suicidal, now the thought of it gives me very little comfort.

Are we weak? I don’t know. Are we different? Perhaps. I won’t judge you.

I only know that we’ve got to love ourselves regardless of what other people and results tell us. It is so hard.

If there is one thing we’ve realised, it is that life is pointless. Nothing matters. There is no purpose behind anything.

We exist the same way a rock, or a plant, or a microbe …

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tired

November 25th, 2005by tired

i wonder why everything is such a struggle for me. i am tired, you know. i think i’ve had enough. i’m 39 and i am a loner that is alone, don’t even have someone else to want to live for or feel guilted into living for. parents dead, no family, no siblings, no spouse, no children, no friends, no job, no energy, no hope. i pretend that i live a life that i want or at least something approximating it. in other words, i lie. i make things sound good, far better than they are, even to myself. most of the time i pretend …

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1

no more pain

October 17th, 2005by Kate

I am 56 years old. I am tired of trying to make it in this world. I have struggled, and did what I had to do to live, and always looked for love and acceptance. I raised my kids by myself, they don’t need me to be a burden in their lives now. They are grown, married, and have families of their own. I cannot offer anything more to anyone, including myself. I have no more to give. I am not needed, wanted, and I don’t have a way to survive. I am scared, and mad at being forced into this predicament by circumstances …

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4

feeling … not feeling

October 4th, 2005by overwhelmed

i am feeling so overwhelmed, that i dont even know what how i feel anymore…is it possible to walk through your own life so numb? not knowing what you’re doin who you’re seeing, talking to, you know you’re hungry but you’re too tired to eat. too tired to sleep. too tired to take a shower, to change… i know i have to work to support my kids, but it’s all too familiar. at least they put a smile on my face…most of the time. i’m such a disappointment – in my parents eyes. failed marriages, three kids, repossessed cars, careless with money. maybe i should …

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0

Out of all people, it has to be those two.

July 19th, 2005by stealth

What would you do, if you are in my shoes? Experiencing what im experiencing now? What if two people that you care most. Somehow betrade you shoots you with their words? This pain I can’t bare, it feels as if i

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1

no answer still & 35

July 18th, 2005by krisparker

I have lots of freind and good family
i dont want to be selfish but im never happy
i would like to end it all some how
and i just want everyone to understand its what i want….
please… I dont want to be here anymore and i never asked to be here.

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5

Suicide’s Hell

July 18th, 2005by krisparker

I need to tell you that my grandma committed suicide which opened the door to many others in our family following her foot steps. Suicide is not a personal choice because suicide opens the door to others in your family to follow you. After my grandmother choose to suicide, my cousin tried three times only to become disabled from it, my husband committed suicide, my brother committed suicide, and then his brother-in-law.

I have spent years of my life trying to convince my children that they must respect life and not allow this to continue.

My God I can’t begin to tell you the Hell …

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2

My First Note

July 16th, 2005by yelling_in_rage

Sometimes I feel like I should die.. it’s been enough. Its the same old story.. people coming here and writing their stuff in stress. Why do I feel so alone when I think about my first love. Why I didn’t ever feel the same again? God! it’s been ten years now! I couldn’t even get out of it? I have lost everything. I am left with me and my slowly fading ambitions that I promised myself to get someday. I’ve lost my mother. She doesn’t like me.. although she says she does. I don’t like my dad because he was never there for me. …

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5

I finally understand everything

June 20th, 2005by stealth

Hes right “in the end, you only got yourself”

All my life, I tried being myself, it didn’t work. I tried being someone else, it didn’t work. And just to end up in pain, all my life i wanted to earn ones trust. I’m kind to everyone, I do everyone favors. All i want is a true friendship. Like i don’t know, everyone don’t consider me as a friend. I lie to myself like I have great friends. pretending everyone was great friends, and always pretending the tears, I have every night are tears of joy. No one understand me. IM friggin gay, not bisexual I …

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7

Outside am smiling, but inside am just dying.

June 14th, 2005by stealth

Nothing Important ( You do not need to read, It might be just a waste of time.)

Outside am smiling, pretending that everything was fine and life for me was great. Smiling to my parents, to my friends and family. But really, am dying and crying inside. But I have learned to keep these feelings to myself. I usally don’t tell anyone about this, or post about my life on any sites. But I learned that letting this out somewhere, makes me feel like I have drop a heavy boulder that I had been on my back for many years. Well, for the past 2 …

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0

May 6th, 2005by Sandra

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12

can’t go on

May 6th, 2005by Sandra

My husband of fifteen years left me without warning on November 4th, 2004, we had both just celebrated our 50th birthdays . No sign, I saw nothing coming, neither did his or my family. We have no kids.

He assured me no other woman was involved. In the weeks that followed I discovered on the internet that he had been registered since June on a web dating service and had found someone.

We have a company together to which I no longer have access. Many things had been hidden from me there too.

In the last four years, I have had …

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Real Loss

March 22nd, 2005by justin

I sit here tonight as I do every night, wishing that I had the answers to this tragedy that seems to be consuming so many people every day. I didn’t realize that there were some many suicides each day. Now that I do know, I know that we are losing really beautiful people at an alarming rate! My son died by suicide six months ago. Everyone thought that his life was perfect! He was 19 years old, in college, had his own place, handsome, so many friends and no one knew the pain that he must have been hiding. He left …

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dark days of surviving a suicide

March 22nd, 2005by justin

My beautiful, wonderful, healthy, happy, loved, intelegent step son killed himself this past Sept. by a gunshot to the head. He was 19. The days since then have been filled with nothing but agony. I find it hard to work, to sleep, to do anything I ever enjoyed. It’s hard to laugh anymore. I’ve got a 10 year boy that I’ve got to help get thru his hero’s suicide. If he would have known the horrible tragedy that his death would cause, he’s still be here. His girlfriend just wanted to move on and didn’t, the end. There is always someone out there to talk …

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Tired of Living and ready to Die

March 5th, 2005by Essb

I dont know why I am writing here, it feels like waste of time. Pretty much how my life is anyway, a big waste of time. I ussually keep things inside because I believe people dont really care about much anyway other than to feel superior when someone else has problems. I never trusted people much anyway, lets face it people have instincts as much as animals, they will cut your throat to save there hide in most cases. Anyway I will share a little bit for what its worth. I hope you all believe in curses because its obvious to me that …

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6

Sooo Tired

November 27th, 2004by geramie

Soooo tired. Sooo tired of living. Sooo tired of existing. Sooo tired of being suicidal. Sooo tired of being me. Sooo tired of living situation. Sooo tired of trying.

Before I was hit by a car, I had dreams. I had a bright future. After the accident, I have nothing. My life plans dissolved and I am in a quagmire of misery. This quagmire has no ending and no beginning. It seems as if it has always been. I have existed longer after the accident than I’d existed before.

Was in the hospital, …

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Living or dying

November 4th, 2004by angel22601

I spend most my days thinking about suicide. I want the pain to stop but it never does. I continue to do things to screw up my life more all the time. I lose job after job because I can’t cope. I can’t sleep or I can’t stay awake.I have been to cousling on always a short term because I can’t seem to keep the appoinments and they will no longer see me anymore.I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know where to turn anymore. I feel loss all the time.

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