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metallic sheen.
coated with rose petals.
Oh how I love you so.
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all of my friends are in complete mayhem, they’re all argueing, and bitching about eachother. it’s almost made me relapse, well, probably has. I really just want to harm, I really do.
had an arguement over facebook, bad idea, I’m gonna get shit about it tomorrow. hah, cba.
fuck it, where’s my razor.
I don’t kno much about this site, I’m looking for an eazy but prommissing way out, I don’t have a car so I can’t try the whole poisoning thing, 2 days ago I tried to owerdose I Gess I started acting weird and now my parents want me to try a drug counseling group, because they think I was just loaded for fun(fuckin idiots) well I need a way out, if anyone has an idea thank you for sharing…
As i said before i’m struggling with my note but here is my first draft.
I still feel like there is a lot missing. Most of my feelings are not covered but i don’t want to confuse matters.
Please tell me what you think.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
Mum,
I’m so sorry for everything i have done. If i could turn back time and start again i would do everything differently. I have tried to change, tried to make you proud but it always seems to backfire.
There is something evil in my soul, something that repells and disgusts people. Did you feel it? Did you know it was there? I have never felt […]
According to my so far limited research, a radiator can reach up to 200-230F or 110C. Spending 8 hours outside in 100F heat can give you heat stroke so surely this method would cause death via heat stroke in a few hours? I realise that heat stroke isn’t the nicest way to go but if you could fall asleep then it would be relatively painless yes? Also would having the radiator on this high cause a fire? If I was going to do it I’d probably put the heat up to 50 or 60C so it wouldn’t be that unbearable.
Any comments about this method would […]
Im miserable beyond words, im the black sheep in my family, my boyfriend broke up with me, my life is in shambles…. No matter what I do, I ruin everything I come in contact with, I dont think theres a light at the end of the tunnel. If there is one I cant see it… Soon there will be another war, the dollar is being devalued and this economy is heading nowhere fast. I tried taking a bottle of sleeping pills which failed horribly, (i slept 3days)…. Does anyone know where/ or who I can buy potassium cyanide? Its supposedly the most peaceful way to […]
My mother got pregnant on purpose to keep my father around. He left my mom when I was only a year old because she was too controlling and greedy. So, my mom decided to take her anger out on me. She wasn’t even around much, s0 my grandparents, aunt and uncle took care of me. I didn’t even call her mom – I just called her by her first name.
I never played with children my age and just hung out around adults. When I entered kindergarten, I was excited to be around kids my age. But, they began to mock me, make fun of my appearance, […]
I finally realized I’m not the only who feels like their life is a living hell. And i also realized that i’m not the only one who wants to just disapear off the face of the earth. Sometimes i feel like taking some alcoholic beverage from my parents room and just drinking until i pass out. This sounds like so much fun to me. but so does taking 3 motrin 800mg and then passing out until two days later. Now i feel like breaking down, i wish i had a shoulder to cry or a guy to hold me tightly in his arms while my […]
hi everyone
I’m here again to talk in public about the most complicated thing I’ve ever had…
this girl left me and accused me of many things that I have never done, I mean really have never done..
lately I came to know that she has been talking around about me, saying bad things about me, saying that I was a psycho, freak, making escorts and sex calls, and most hurtful and stupid that I look for animal porn…
I mean it’s just complicated, I believe the girl loves me, and she’s innocence, but what on earth would make someone think that way? I mean why didn’t she accuse […]
ive been looking cosntantly but like you- am scared..of the pain. which will be inevitable. reading about it doesnt really do much but im sure when the wheels are in motion, the pain will be unfathomable. let me know if you’d like to share, im greatly interested in hearing your method, ill letyou know what ive been thinking of: bedford424 @ gmail
It means exactly what it says. I woke up to thunder and lightening today. i am so paranoid, and i have a headache. ugh this sucks. Someone actually asked me if i was pskitzophrenic or something. I mean i took my meds, but im still phsycho. And its suppose to rain all week, i hate it this means more ibprofun inmy system because of headaches. ugh. oh and i started excercising, i went for a jog yesterday. see what i mean about being paranoid im also very easily distracted. ugh.
Anyone who has ever shown me affection, I’ve let down. I used to believe in living with honour, and that I was living honourably. Now I realize that I’m far more wretched than most.
I have uncontrollable bouts of anger, triggered by seemingly minor incidences. I try so hard to control my responses, but thus far to no avail. My wife will leave me in 6 months if I can’t change. She has such a pure soul, and I’ve let her down.
At our wedding, everyone said that our vows were the most beautiful they’ve ever heard. They were […]
I’ve been following the stories on this site for a little while now and the site has been an escape of sorts, but i am yet to post my story, before i do i want to applaud everyone who’s shared. Its always nice to know one is not alone.
In contrast to the way most of the stories on here start I’ve had a great life. I’ve always had an amazing family, I had the best time in high school: cliche popular guy, dating fantastic girls. Good grades. No one could second guess me and i forged rock hard friendships that hold this very day.
Of course […]
Alot of people wont read this, I am not that interesting. I am not humorous or witty. I have no money in the bank and no romance story for you. This will read as if im a mentally ill asian man who doesnt have a job. Maybe like a japanese person that kills thierself to save face or ass. It is four am on the first or possibly second day of spring, i will get no vagina this mating season as i am very poor. I have been schizophrenic almost all my life. Now in my early twenties i begin to worsen, and become more […]
Last November a kid at my school in the US committed suicide by making hydrogen sulfide in his car. He had warning signs taped to his car windows.
Dad
Do you actually believe you can change someone by changing a variable? They may act different at times, but they’re the same person. Jasmine was raised by a drunken, drugged idiot and a bitchy mom. She hates her parents, because they don’t listen, because they treated her badly, and now you’re trying to control the situation, control her, because you think you will make a difference? She doesn’t like you, because you are an ignorant piece of shit. You don’t listen and youre an idiot. You only hear what you want to hear. And try to confuse others. You ask the stupidest questions and […]
What the fuck is a nutter, first of all? Also, I am not a cutter, but wish I was one, but I’m also a *****. I choke myself instead and write depressing shit. Choking, not as in choking a chicken, or masturbation, but as in my own neck. I asphyxiated myself with my hands on my neck. Only problem is I can’t find anyone that’s the same. I feel even worse, jk, but I am pretty pissed off I can’t find people who do the same thing as I do. I check google, but only found celebrites doing auto-erotic shit and suicide methods. I want […]
Sorry I posted so much. I get internet at my moms place and I just use the notes section of my itouch to record my thoughts on most things like when my dad beat me up… I love comments and I may take a while to text back. If you want to, then text me at (805)336-7012. I may not be able to text because my cell phone migh be disconnected since my mom is troubled financially. Fun life right? 🙁 sorry for the texting slang, emoticons and other teen text stuff..
Ryan Smithson, Ghosts of War, quoted.
” I comptemplate crying, but that seems useless. What does crying ever really do for us? It doesn’t solve our problems. It doesn’t solve problems. It doesn’t make us run faster or shoot better. If anything, crying only delays our solutions to the problem.”Â
(I use the notes section of my iPhone like a journal… I love this dream, wish I could sleep and re-dream it…)
Today, I had another dream about Nycolle. I don’t feel angry, or annoyed, but slightly happier.Â
  It started out random, I was walking through a mall and ended up naked, then wore my blanket I was sleeping in an hour ago. I ended up at a game store, buying a random game, my mom came through the door took the game and disappeared. I walked with another naked dude and we talked, don’t remember, but I ended up having clothes on and went to […]