Isn’t it amazing how one person can make your day so much better? Owen did that for me. I think I’ve mentioned him before. Well, he was recently diagnosed with leukemia, which killed me. I realized that I really do like him. And I asked him out. And he said yes. So now I have a boyfriend that I would almost say that I love him already, because we’ve been friends for a while, and we know each other really well. Of course, I still like Trevor, but we both are in a relationship now, so… Yeah. He’s too late. Lol. 😀
Category:
Stories of Hope
I look at my hips, arm and belly. Seeing those red, fresh cuts is such a relief. The lovely pain, that beautiful bright red, those little blood drops, your sharp knife. That good feeling that isn’t possible to express in words. Just that feeling that isn’t repositionable…
Call me obsessed. Call me a whore, a slut. But whatever. You don’t know how I feel. I was called so many names when everyone knew that I liked Trevor. And then they got all mad when I started liking other people. Some people actually said “God, you like everyone in band, don’t you?”. I hated it. That’s part of why I put walls up. I was sick of other people trying to lord over my relationships. It’s none of their business, anyway! And everybody got all mad at All-Region tryouts because I was talking to him. And laughing. And, uhm, he held my hand. (Actually, […]
be straight up I suppose…. My names Serena , I’m in 7th grade at Bemidji Middle School , I have a smile on my face most of the time(= , but everybody knows im ‘depressed’ , because …. I cut myself , a lot… my legs , my arms , my wrists , my stomach…. It make’s me feel better. I don’t know what else to do! , I ALWAYS get called a ; HOE , WHORE , **** , ***** , FAT , UGLY , WORTHLESS , ATTENTION WHORE , DUMB , BOYFRIEND STEALER , etc.. It sucks , a lot , I don’t […]
So, Emily isn’t my friend anymore. I just ignored her all day, wouldn’t talk to her at all, and in 4th period, she gave me a note saying that she wouldn’t bother me anymore. As happy as this makes me, most of my thoughts are drifting toward something. See, I wore some makeup and jewelry and stuff today (I don’t usually do that). The weird thing is that Trevor stared at me every time I saw him. The reason that it makes me think is because he used to do that all the time. Everyday. It was so wonderful. Regardless of what I was wearing. […]
Well, I was wondering who of you guys is ever been bullied. So if you please would answer the following questions, thank you.
The questions:
1). Have you ever been bullied or been a bully, or both?
2). For how long have you been bullied?
3). What kind of bullying was it? (think about physical, emotional, abusing you or calling you names, follow you, ignore you, and so on)
4). What was the worst thing that ever happened when you were bullied?
Feel free to say anything else you want or to answer not all the questions.
My answers to the questions:
1). I’ve been bullied, […]
So, I’ve been happy. But things still don’t go how I need them to. Â Trevor will talk to me, of course. He even jokes with me and stuff. But he also still goes out with Kendall. But still. I wish it was me in her place. Gosh. The sad thing is that he doesn’t have a “type”. I can’t figure out what it is that he likes in a girl! He has dated girls that are nothing alike! None of them have anything in common. Anyway, it’s not like it would matter anyway. If he doesn’t like me, good for him. I’m not going to […]
I found the light, but I don’t have a fucking clue what to do with it. XD I really don’t. I’m not joking. I’m happy, but I feel like there’s got to be something more to it than this. My head is spinning from all the ideas of where  to go with my life now that I’ve cleared the road.  I just don’t know. I feel deep in my heart, somehow, I feel like I need, yes, I said need to tell Trevor what I feel about him. Strange, I know, but since I gave my life to God, I get these feelings sometimes, and when I […]
I don’t know what to say. Damn, I woke up and I felt like this automatically. I don’t love myself. I hate myself. I’ve fucked everything up somehow. I can’t do anything right, I’m ugly, and I”m fat. I always thought that guys would like me more because I am the way I am. I play video games all the time. I’m not girly. I like the color pink, and I like makeup, etc., but I love hunting, and I want to be a vet when I’m older. I’m pretty smart, I guess. I take Pre-AP classes, and I’ve kept all A’s all year, every […]
What do we live for? or should I ask WHY?
Some of us manage to achieve something in this so-called “World” like having sonS and daughterS, wife/husband or Family itself. Others of us manage to achieve money and many more material things. But one thing I do not understand, WHY do we exist? There is no sense for us to live, we just achieve some of the things I mentioned above then we just die.. like we never, ever existed.
I know some of you will say something like “We live to create other lifes” “You are selfish,this is the Balance of our World” “You’re crazy” […]
Okay, so I posted a post two days ago. That I was a little bit proud on myself that I kept my promiss to myself so far on. That promiss was that I had to write a post at least once a day. I maked that promiss because I can never hold on something for a long time. But that whole feeling of a little bit proud is totally gone, because yesterday I didn’t wrote a post. Just because I couldn’t encourage myself to write a post. Also today I almost couldn’t encourage myself, but I really pushed myself because writing on this website is […]
Hello guys, its been about four months i think since i wrote anything. I guess because ive been writting on my journal (which is now burned). For abour a month now…or more, ive been more than depressed. I keep thinking its nothing. I mean im only 15, its normal to feel as if your world is falling apart, or any little thing bothers you because of the way we live or anything like that. Truth is, im getting tired of listening to all these thing. Telling myslf all this things is just huting me even more. Cause really its all fucking lies in my head. […]
This website, though I havent been on for an extremely long time, has seriously made my days a bit brighter.
It’s just nice to have some people who kind of understand what I’m going through. kind of.
But still, it feels exremely good to share my feelings with people who wont judge. I wont be called an attention seeker, wont get judged, and will be talking to people who will actually listen.
To be honest, I started this because I was basicly forced to. My therapist, who has become a very good friend of mine even though I’m a teenager, said it might be good to talk out […]
So, I stumbled upon this site from Google. I haven’t been very depressed recently, and actually, my life has somewhat improved. It still is hard, but I would like to share my experience with you all.
I was 9 years old, and it was the summer after 3rd grade.
I had been raised by a loving, Catholic family, and went to a Catholic school. In my eyes, the world was a lovely place, and there was no other place I’d rather be. I had one best friend who I spent every day with. To me, everyone believed in God, because who wouldn’t?
My perfect vision of the […]
   As I’ve spoken about in previous posts, I’ve had depression, anxiety and paranoid delusions for most of my life and it’s not easy to live with, especially the depression.
    For me, at 11 years old it began with a deep sadness that just never seemed to lift. It spiralled pretty quickly and I began to spend an awful lot of time alone in my bedroom. I felt as though I was the loneliest person in the world because nobody could really relate to what I was feeling. The thing that got to me most was that some people would say things like, “you’re […]
Im excited.
No, really I am.
I’m going to Miami in a couple of days. It’s for my dad’s work and my cousins wedding. I’m going to see me family. im going to get out of this cold weather. Im going to see my cousin have the best day of her life.
Buuut, I’m also going to have to wear a swimsuit.
And, see my grandmas face fall when I walk in.
She doesnt like me that much. I’ve heard her say so. She doesnt approve of my “lifestyle”. She says Im a slutty, skater, who has no self control. I’m also a mess, bad example, and a future druggie.
Thanks […]
I want to know something …
Is it nice to have both your parents? Is it nice that you’ve never heard them yell or scream at each other? Is it nice that they support you no matter what?
Is it nice to live in that nice house? Is it nice to have lived in the same house you were born in? Is it nice to never have had to pack up and move and leave all your friends and memories behing because your parents couldnt afford your life there?
Is it nice to not worry about how you and your family is going to pay for your college […]
My name is Emily and this is my story. July 29,2011, 3 month anniversary with my boyfriend Ian. My best friends Mia, Maria, & planned to go to a Rangewide and meet our boyfriends there to hang out. We went, our boyfriends never showed up. No big deal, girl time. Well, the dance got boring and I told Mia and Maria I was gonna go hang out with Ian. I told them to call me later to meet up again. I got to my boyfriends house to find him very drunk, his brother had a party. I put him to bed and we cuddled and […]
Life is hateful mean and cruel each day  we feel like screaming  but we stop and know that it doesn’t matter if we do or not because everybody has turn a deaf ear. We feel trapped lost and chain to the habits that run in a never ending circle.
I want to help-help people like me who just want things to be right again. Who wants someone to care, to love them regardless of the past mistakes , who wants to be happy with her/himself , who is so tired of being strong and for once just want to be weak and have someone to pick them up.  I am here to help along with to […]
When I started writing/posting on this site, I made a promise to myself. I promised myself to post EVERY DAY at least one post. I actually didn’t believe I would maintain this for more than one week. I’m a person that starts completely enthusiastic, but after a few times doing it, I always quit. So thid was a big and important challange for me. Now I’m a little proud of myself, because this is my 19th post in 18 days and I wrote everyday!! I finally do something every day. I hope that my promise won’t be broken soon…