For those who have passed on.
It’s funny how the people you were closest to can forgot you so fast, move on like you were never here.
It’s somewhat comforting at the same time because I now know that when I leave, I’ll be forgotten just as fast.
I think about him everyday. He left me broken.
As we try to survive in this world we live in
We seek out meaning for the life that was given
Some search for it their entire youth
Yet little find it or see the truth
Majority give up when all hope is lost
Others are consumed by the lies they came across
We all believe it gets better after it gets worse
But those words do not apply on this curse
Even if we tried to satisfy every need
There is no cure for one’s greed
It destroys us like a cancer
Though we find ourselves alone in our pain and blackness we are many. Funny how demons push and guide us individually, but we are many. Alone in the dark we cry for deaths sweet release, but we are many. Hopeless am I here by myself, but we are many.
We are legion
Seriously, why do I even try?
All she cares about is him. As long as he’s in her life, she doesn’t care about me even though I’ve been here for her this entire time. But, I guess it’s hard to care for something you can’t see..
She’s all I’ve ever known. The love of a mother or a father was always scarce to me, so of course I began to grow closer to her since she basically gave me that feeling I’ve been missing out on. But, I have to face it that I was only her income. Only ever everyone’s income. She doesn’t care and I have […]
My life is such that the only thing I look forward to is sleep. In my dreams I am free of everything including gravity. Sweet dreams where I am hero. I awake sometimes in tears because of the simple fact that I woke up. I long for an eternal sleep. Hero forever
I am 26 years old, sailor by profession. I am a very shy and let alone type of a guy, had problems making friends as a child. As i grew up i became even more emotional and sensitive. People say i am smart but i dont feel like it, I think i am average. I think i am a kind and a good hearted person but i do get evil thoughts at times and i have to fight to get them out telling myself “those are bad thoughts”. Since my teenage days i have had suicidal thoughts. I have been in ” in love” situations […]
He’s gone.
His flat-line still ringing in my head
Hello.
First I want to apologize for my English, it is not my native language.
It is already one year that I am asking to god every day to return me back in time (two years would be enough). I made a lot of mistakes in my life but its two years since I began making major mistakes.
I am very weak person very very weak and all of my problems I have now is only my fault.
I was happy, open minded and social person, with lot of perspectives and possibilities, with wonderful family and amazing friends. Now I have none of them except of family they still […]
PLEASE READ…
I know my own little segment I am about to write may be pointless to most people, but I want to share my story to some people. To all those people, learning how to tie a noose, or learning what you can drink to die faster, or even learning the best pill to take to end your life, please don’t. As a child of suicide, I’ve come to realize how goddamn pointless other people’s pleas to not end your life can be. I mean, I tried to end my life a total of 10 or 11 times, I really stopped keeping track after the […]
Ever since I was a little girl I always asked questions about my little sister.. The sister my mother gave up for adoption. Our mother was a drug addict who chose men over her kids and is STILL continues doing drugs. my life was very rough but I was always the type to wish for a happily ever after… So I made excuses after excuses for my mom. She got pregnant not to long after she gave my sister up for adoption but abused pills which led to a stillborn.. My other baby sister Seirra (May she Rest with the angels) … My mother then […]
sometimes, i put my fingers to my neck to feel my pulse. usually it’s late at night, when no one else is around and its just me and the sound of your voice ringing through my head and bringing tears to my eyes for no reason because i’m supposed to be past you. i put my fingers to my neck and i feel my life beat below them, fast and thready like the way my thoughts race. when i do that, that unthinking check to just make sure i’m still alive, i remember the way it used to be, you know. the late nights with my […]
I’ve recently decided to commit suicide. Im comfortable with this decision and Im excited to take the journey into the great unknown. I’ve recently made a shitfest of my life and there’s no fixing it at this point. The pain Ive caused and the pain Ive felt are just unfixable.
To preface all of this, I used to be a heroin addict. Ive been clean for 3 years but I still get withdrawals from time to time.
Two years ago I met a girl. She was great. We clicked right off the bat. Started going out and she got pregnant within a month. She left the […]
I can see the reasoning behind keeping a site like this….well….discrete, I guess. But, you know, I’ve wanted, on a couple of occasions, to sign in and TALK to people (when I’ve been NEAR FUCKING KILLING MYSELF!!), but I can’t figure out how to fucking LOG IN so I can COMMUNICATE!!! WTF?!!!
There’s no LOG IN details when you visit this site! You may be DESPERATE – and you may well be RIGHT ON THE FUCKING EDGE AND DESPERATE TO TALK TO LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE, but……how the fuck do you GET IN!????????
I managed to log on ONLY because I inadvertantly clicked on somebody’s POST! Is that how […]
Hello all, first post here. I’ve been reading through other people’s stories, and have felt touched (and even a little happy) to see the respinses and support coming from others. So i figured i might share my own story, so that i might feel some understanding. I’m going to type a very long story here, and to anyone who reads even a little bit, i offer my thanks. I am going to sound a little bit dramatic, because right now i am feeling dramatic, and depressed (though that word feels so insignificant compared to the gaping emptiness in my chest). I am going to talk […]
I read other stories here for a while and decided to post my own here because I’m through with this shit. If you’re easily triggered then leave now because I’m not holding back because I’ve been through both fucked up and weird shit. Fair warning: I might ramble at times.
I’ve had a shit life for quite a while now and I’m officially done with it. I’ve been through a shit school system and graduated, dealt with my dumbass parents until my dad fell off a roof during a job (good riddance. Bastard left us in a financial mess) and my mom died in 2010. I […]
Mind like quicksand, but I try to stay above land.
Kaleidoscope of different scenarios. Life falling in a burial. Heart broken like shattered glass, not healing no mater how much time has passed. Haunted dreams every night, becoming weaker after every fight. Can’t distinguish what is real or in my head, every night laying on my deathbed. Anxiety, bipolar and PTSD, is slowly overpowering me.
Suicidal Thoughts but I’m afraid of death, continuous thoughts of how I will lose my last breath. Anxious, anxious all the time, but with meds they tell I’ll be just fine. Irritable, angry, sadden and scared, all through my mind […]
My girlfriend of almost three years just left me with no explanation, Im just looking over pictures of us together and i cant stand it. I had just gone with my friend to get an engagement ring just five months ago. i made the last payment on it just last week. I was going to ask her to marry me at our favorite cafe, it was where we first met. i had stopped her from suicide after she had lost her father and now im honestly the one whos trying. since that night we had made more memories in a few years than i had made […]
They ask me tell them everything and now I’m crazy. I tell them about my sadness. I tell them about my self loathing. I tell them about my secret desires to be dead. I tell them about this black pit I’m in.
They tell me I’m crazy
Today commemorates eight months since I have gotten the urge to turn to this forum. At my last visit, I was broken, and quite humorously, at this visit, broken no longer can summate my existence. In exactly one year, I have had few victories and so much pain and deception that I have crawled back into the safety of my introvercy. Since my last visit, (when I was a 18 year old bum, not attending school) I have made some progression. I currently work, go to school and volunteer regularly but my battle scars are still present, Scars that refuse to heal, scars which threaten […]
I am here to tell you one thing. Death isn’t my solution, it is my hideaway spot. The place I dream about when things get bad, the place I think about when I want to end things, but cant bring myself to do it. I find it comforting to dream about what could be if I died, but then it begins to scare me, it begins to make me feel alone, and sometimes I don’t know what to do. How to handle life, how to keep going. Im so tired of struggling, so tired of living off of nothing, having to rely on others, I […]
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