It’s weird. I love helping people and it makes me feel good about doing it. Here lately I’ve been thinking about sharp objects. A few months ago I tried slitting my wrist and just being done with everything… I just want to be done with life… But I guess it’s not my time yet…

How do someone recover so fast?.. Like.. Recover from all the pain. How to stop? How to stop all the voices in your head? How to stop myself from thinking that suicide is the only way?… I’m only 15 but .. Suicide is all I can think about. If I find life difficult to handle now.. What about the future when there’s more obstacles coming my way?

I slit. First time, I’m sure it was for attention. Just to get someone’s attention, I attempt suicide. Funny uh?… I first started cutting myself was about 3 years ago. But ever since that first blade that I draw across my skin… It gives me a feeling of satisfaction . Up till today, I still cut myself but then… I don’t know if it was to get the person attention again or is it because of all the pain that I can’t handle.
It was.. An addiction to slit. Like, each time you had some problem and you began to solve the problem by cutting […]

Hey if any one wants to chat or something send me an invite on Skype we can video chat or IM it doesn’t matter. My SN is Frosty66686. just mention this site so i know who or where ur coming from. send me an invite anytime ill accept it.

bring me a dream…

Gods Children, Satan’s Plaything

They say we are all Gods Children.

Why does our father ignore us?

Why doesn’t our father console us?

Why do we have to ask for our father’s comfort?

They say our God is in us all.

Why does father want us to destroy his vessel?

Why doesn’t father make us feel loved?

Why do we have to ask for fathers love?

They say God is always with us.

Why Doesn’t father talk to us?

Why does father make us feel alone?

Why do we have to ask father to be in our hearts?

They say we are nothing but […]

Sometimes I wish there was some sort of real time meet ups over Skype, teleconference, chat rooms, at a dinner even, where people could come and discuss freely about their feelings, life circumstances, suicide plans and the deep depression that makes them feel like suicide may be the only way out. Without fear of people calling the police, telling you to snap put of it, reminding you that a lot of people go through bad times. The fact that you have to remain so closed on the subject makes you feel even more alone.

Oh well, just a wish. This secret is a terrible […]

I was hoping you’d disappear. See, I’ve come to realize that though I hate my life, I abhor yours. You and all of your perfection, your pride, your happiness. You and your perfect family with your picket fence and house on the hill. So then, as I sat there at my window watching the rain pour into that very lonely night, I couldn’t help but wish you away. I awoke from peace, leaning against a cool window and pulling a blanket over my shoulder. You hadn’t crossed my mind…until the pregnancy test caught my gaze. Will I never be rid of you?

that big question whether you going to stop cutting but then you think about it you really don’t want to stop the cutting because it’s like something that has became you

and we all understand that it’s dangerous but the thing is we don’t want to be reminded what’s going to happen, thats why we do it because we already know what the risk is.

but the biggest question i have is are we ever gonna stop cutting? why is it that we feel so deeply into cutting and have to get into arguments over it? is it worth the cutting and make our parents upset or […]

This may be because I’m high as hell but still I think it would be cool.

I was thinking that it would be cool if everybody on here that is feeling the same as me you know alone,useless,a failure,whatever it is would get together and hang out talk and just have each other back. I mean it would make since, nobody will understand what were going through unless they’re going through the same thing. There would be no psychiatrist or councilor involved it would be just us, for us. I bounced it off my sister and she said it sounds like a cult lol. I told […]

I was watching colombiana, and in the credits they played NIN’s song Hurt song by Johnny Cash. As I listined to the lyrics I imagined myself committing suicide to this song, it just fit so well. I’ve always imagined myself doing the deed while listing to something but nothing fit perfectly.

Hurt

By: Johnny Cash

Originally performed by Nine Inch Nails

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that’s real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything[Chorus:]
What have I […]

Hi I’m 17 and live in a small town in ca and wow I don’t even know what to say I guess that all my life all I have ever wanted was to be loved to be someone’s world and for them to be mine I don’t want money fame or to be remembered just to die with a wife and some kids but no matter how hard I try I can’t I never under stand I’m a nice guy who cares more about outhers then my self but all the girls seem to like the assholes that treat them like shit I dont know […]

I want to  be gone but I can’t. What if something goes wrong and I survive? Then ill look like an even bigger fool. What will people think? not that my family cares but I can’t hit my sister. Shes she only one that’s there even though shes a loT younger. I know it would damage her for the rest of her life and my parents would be mad at me. But they don’t understand when they  yell at me to do things or call me fat I want to leave. They tell me I don’t get it but i do. So much.

I feel like such an idionfor writing this, that I pity myself so much but I can’t help it. I don’t even known if this is normal but it probably is. I can’t be alone with myself. Whenever I am left to think, I decide yet amother thing or daily action social interaction is pointless. Why do we laugh? I keep insulting myself and I can’t get over the fact that ik a failure. But I’m only 14. It just doesn’t work. then I keep thinking I’m special, but I’m not. If I was special wouldn’t everyone else have to be too? I call other […]

My  legs begin to break, i walked this path for far too long, my lungs, they start to ache, but still i’m carry on. I’m choking on my words like i got a noose around my neck. I can’t believe it’s come to this, and i fear, i fear, that the end is near. I fear that the fear is ending tonight.

I fear this is the end, this happens all the time, this happens every day,
But I never seem to quit.

I can’t stop the bleeding, and it’s only getting worse, this happens all the time
This happens every day
But I never seem to quit.

Only the dead have […]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVZ_lLUIIyU

“A self-destructive man feels completely alienated, utterly alone. He’s an outsider to the human community. He thinks to himself, “I must be insane.” What he fails to realize is that society has, just as he does, a vested interest in considerable losses and catastrophes. These wars, famines, floods and quakes meet well-defined needs. Man wants chaos. In fact, he has to have it. Depression, strife, riots, murder – all this dread. We’re irresistibly drawn to that almost orgiastic state created out of death and destruction. It’s in all of us. We revel in it. Sure, the media tries to put a sad face on […]

I lay awake in bed complaining to myself how fat I am and how much weight I have gained amd I get up in the morning and I can literally taste how good it would feel to be thin. But then I see food. I know I could go on a diet but I have tried so many times and ended up gaining weight. As much as food is necessary to survive, I need it to survive mentally. Eating is the only time during which I  not thinking and drowning myself in thought. I say I want an eating disorder, but I have one. Just […]

I’m extremely sensitive to sounds and noise. I’f I’m somewhere in public, and I am not distracting myself (either with music or by talking to myself), I start hearing everything. I hear every little detail; every voice, every footstep, every turning page. It all jumbles up and turns in to a high pitched screech in my head, that doesn’t stop until I leave the area and go somewhere secluded. I’ve passed out from this five times. It physically hurts me, I get migraines and I become extremely dizzy. It’s been so bad that a year ago, I had to start taking online classes because I […]

And I’m attracted to them, initially.

The pattern goes like this: We meet, hang out and instantly connect. I’m very attracted to his emotional sincerity, creativity, attentiveness, and intelligence. At first, he seems like a dream; only an hour has passed and we feel comfortable talking about our most personal fears, and hopes. We kiss and he’s so romantic and flattering, saying he admires my beauty and kindness. He feels as if he can open up to me, easily reveal himself. I fall even faster; he must be my soulmate with this mutual vulnerability and ease. It’s just so damn easy to feel good around […]

“It’s never too late to be who you might have been. ”

What do you guys think about that?