I tried so hard to have a friendship with the woman I truly love, because all I look forward to in this world is seeing her find her soulmate, become the person she wants to be and sail into the proverbial sunset. I don’t care about  me or what becomes of me, I just want to see her be happy, with a fulfilling job and a fulfilling relationship with a good man who’s right for her. But now she’s begun dating a guy named Mitch and deleted my number; she wants me in her life like she wants polio. Now that I can’t see her […]
Where to start..
I guess with how I’m feeling right now. I’m doing awful. And by awful I mean I want to kill myself. I wish that sometimes I would get the guts to try it again. Or I wish I would have died the first time.
My boyfriend has depression as well. And when he is having a bad day he just goes home. (Normally he stays with me as we mostly live together) Like today he got off work early. I didn’t know what time because he never told me. He just said he was having a hard time and didn’t want to […]
I think this is the happiest I’ve been in a while…I…
Let me start:
When I was younger, I was bullied. I had no escape from the world. That was, until the day I got my mp3. Music was a whole different world to me. It still is. It’s all I breathe for. My life, my love and my soul are devoted to this otherworldly being…I’m intoxicated…
Anywho, there was one song preprogrammed into the mp3. I couldn’t pronounce the name at the time, so I just called it Jane and Eric’s waltz. It fit at the time. I had fallen madly in love with the song, […]
I am lost in my false reality. Ever sense the love of my life left me I don’t know what to do with myself. He told me he needed time to get his life together and I said I would wait. But the longer I wait the harder it gets. I didn’t want people to know how hurt I was so I tell them we are engaged and will elope next year. If they ask where he is i say away on business. I thought letting myself live in this dream would make me feel better but it just makes me more depressed. I don’t […]
seriously I think I’m losing it. It’s like my mind is eating itself with bad thoughts and I don’t think I can handle it at this point. I need to feel nothing at this point. I can’t bring myself to commit suicide at this point, I have too many failed attempts to mess up again. I just kind of want to not exist? but never have existed I think is a more accurate term. I see my therapist on Wed. but I don’t know how it will go, I think he is going to give me skills to cope which I don’t know how that […]
Right now, I really don’t see the reason for trying or for talking or for breathing. I’m just done. I’m tired of being not pretty enough. I’m tired of not being not skinny enough. I’m tired of not being perfect enough. I’m tired of being pushed around and being called those nasty names. I’m tired of not being good enough. And mostly, I’m tired of being tired. I don’t know why everybody hates me, or maybe I do because now I hate me too. I look at the mirror everyday and I cant look at that ugly looking piece of shit in the mirror. My “friends” […]
The constant movement, struggle, and rotation of the world sets my mind ablaze. The constant parade of our society shouting demands from all people of all ages to look like this, talk like this, dress like this, believe in this, support this; if not, you’re nothing. How sweet is that…?
The neverending battle between good and evil, which has an invisible origin, kills my nerves every day. It’s like it makes me paranoid, asking myself constantly, “Am I believing in the right God?”, “Am I acting like I’m supposed to in order to be a member of this spiritual group/organization?”…..thoughts of ‘not being good enough’ or […]
I got this postcard. And it read, it said:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_pcFl5BBxY
Dear Amigo, Dear Partner:
Listen uh, I just want to say thanks. So.. thanks.
Thanks for all the presents. Thanks for introducing me to the Chief.
Thanks for putting on the feedbag. Thanks for going all out.
Thanks for showing me your Swiss Army knife.
Oh and uh, thanks for letting me autograph your cast.
Hug and kisses. XXXXOOOO.
Oh yeah, P.S.
I.. I feel, feel like
I am in a burning building, and I gotta go.
‘Cause I.. I feel, feel like I am
In a burning building,
And I gotta go.
stay strong my lovelys.
Everyone has heard of the term, ‘teen angst’, or at least you should have heard it before. It’s a period in an adolescent’s teen years where many changes are taking place all at once, and it may cause some strange side effects. Depression, withdrawal from family and even friends, ‘out there’ ways of style, and very volatile behavior. These ‘strange’ things happen because of the unbalanced hormones in the teen’s body that are trying to get balanced, preparing them for adulthood.
I am 15 years of age, 16 on July 22nd. I was prescribed Prozac last year around the beginning of June. Now, if my ‘depression’ were to be stemming from teen angst, like many […]
I’m not sure how to say this, I’ve never posted on something like this before. But I quit.
I’m turning 18 in almost 2 weeks, but I don’t think I’ll last that long. I’m depressed, I have been for a while, but instead of accepting that and finding a way to cope with it, my dad is ignoring it. I really noticed it after my mom passed away a year and a half ago. Granted, it’s normal to be sadder than usual during that time, I realize this. To try and cheer up, I tried looking back at the time before we learned she had cancer, […]
I’ve come to the conclusion that in my life it would be best if I felt nothing ever. I’m never really happy, but sadness, anxiety, anger, frustration tends to surround me completely at this point. I need to move along in my life and I think the only way I could do that is to feel nothing. I don’t want emotions. For me it’s either I wish to have never existed or feel nothing. I can only do one of those at this point. If anyone knows of antidepressant meds that could help me accomplish this? Or any other way?
like honestly, I think the […]
What’s it like to take medication? Is it helpful or harmful, and are the side effects too great?
If you’ve read any of my other comments or my story, you know I’m a proponent of choosing life over death, and I think the words in this video kinda sum up why, in a way:
I’ve read lots of posts here over the last two years..
It seems like there are a lot of failed attempts..
so, without any ill intentions on my part..
Do random things just go wrong or something?
I’ve always been too scared to try because I know myself..
I’m a VERY huge perfectionist.. not toward others, just things I do..
So I know very well that I will not fail if I try..
That’s why I’ve never tried because I still have a small small hope..
and as long as I still have that tiny hope(even if that same tiny hope
feels so hollow or totally gone some days), I won’t try it yet..
So […]
80% of people who commit suicide have made at least one previous attempt.
People with a diagnosed mental health condition are at particular risk.
90% of suicide victims suffer from a psychiatric disorder at the time of their death.
Those at the highest risk of suicide are people suffering from alcoholism, clinical depression or schizophrenia. Previous suicide attempts are also an indication of particular risk.
Up to 20% of survivors try again within a year, and as a group they are 100 times more likely to go on to complete suicide than those who have never attempted suicide.
The world population is estimated to number 7.094 billion by the United States Census Bureau (USCB).
Rar Rar Rar…
How do you switch off your suicidal brain?
Stupidly purchased helium tank, […]
I am so tired. So tired of being so damn sad all the time. Tired of feeling lonely in a room full of people. Tired of feeling like I’m always on the outside. Tired of life.
I’m here today because I’m feeling extra depressed. Yesterday I actually counted my attempts and I realized I’m up to 7. What do you do when the only person in your life that ever made you happy doesn’t want to be with you? They tell you they love you and still care about you but are determined not to be with you. After all the promises we made about never letting something like this happen and she did it anyway. I can’t recall any dream I’ve ever had but now I dream every single night about her. Happy dreams where shes with me, then I […]