I just discovered this website and reading some of ya’ll’s posts called out to me and made me want to write stuff down. So why not do it for you people, someone who gets what im going through.

In less than 2 months I’ll be 22 years old. I’ve been thinking about suicide since i was 12. Depression and anxiety have been a part of my life since I was a baby. I remember being 4 or 5 years old, and feeling anxious and unsafe all the time. I grew up in a home where fighting, co-dependency, depression and hysteria was considered normal so I didn’t […]

Hi. I’ve never really done this before. I’m a thirteen year old girl. I used to have these huge dreams of changing the world, being someone. I still do, but it’s harder to continue. I have nothing wrong with my life. I have a good home life, things at school are okay I guess, no one has it perfect. I don’t know why, but I can’t stop thinking about cutting and committing suicide. I feel like it would be so much easier. Sleeping with out dreams eternally. I don’t know why I want life to end so badly. Lately I’ve been in my room a […]

i know im sick. i have made my stomach so small that a cracker fills me up all day but ive been trying to eat more..not going so well:/ i cant focus on anything cuz im dizzy my vision is spotty im weak and freezing always…everytime i stand up i feel crazy light headed, everytime i breathe it hurts (thats gone on for 3 months) and then i cut a lot more and deep too…suicide is my number one thing on my mind lately…i used to be not tobad…but this doesnt feel right…idk yet but i might see if i can go get help now. […]

Power is a filthy poison
for which there is no cure
It steals the soul and taints the life
and can make one quite impure.
Power vibrates in the beast
its sanity has gone
now it bleeds and weeps of greed
and thinks there is no wrong.

So take your need and power’s lust
and choose your victims wise
Scream your battle cry aloud
and shape your prey’s demise.

Demean the different, out and in
and make their life a hell
Carve wounds with words into their soul
and in your hate they dwell.

Destroy those who oppose your will
with shouts and strikes and sin
Claim that […]

What is so ugly about me,

that I’m in my Junior year.

And have never been to a big party?

Everyday I wake up hoping it is the last day. Well wondering and thinking of ways to end it because I have lost all hope. I don’t know why I feel this way, I have no sad story to tell. I have it all. I am not dumb or really ugly I am Ok at what I do but I am not really good at anything. I am always in the middle I think it makes me more mad that I have no friends. No one bullies me or anything it’s just that I don’t like the people that want to be friends with me […]

I’ve read so many of the stories on here, and I feel that I should write mine, too. Although it isn’t as bad as others, it got me where I am.

Two years ago, my friend confessed to cutting herself. I was devastated, and all I wanted was to be there for her. I didn’t want her to do it anymore, I wanted her to be okay. So I stayed up late for her, and I was her personal therapist for a while. This was when i was 12 years old.

My mum fell pregnant and I cried for the whole weekend. I was already neglected and […]

Hello everyone.

My name is Belle. I have never been on here before but I’ve been observing Miss Kyu for a while and I decided  why not try it out just for the hell out of it? Seems fun enough. I am miss kyu’s darker and more hated side. She hates me. Haha. But she has no choice but to want and need me. Where else will she push all her regrets and negative emotions? Today is her birthday, she hates her birthday. So it’s a day where she runs away and lets me out for some fresh air. All day, both of us have been […]

Well, today school got too much for me and I made myself sick so I got to go home. When I was sitting with my mum, we got onto the topic of suicide somehow, (she doesn’t know I’m suicidal) and she said that people who commit suicide are selfish. Do you know how much that stabbed me? I can only think of what she would think if I ever plucked up the courage to do it.

But in my view, not that it matters, people who commit suicide aren’t selfish at all. They’re miserable, and they’re trapped. They need an out and they find one. If […]

Things were supposed to get better. I’ve made great friends here on SP and even have a ‘special someone’ in my life.

But of course, last night it all came crashing down. There are no words to describe how broken I am now. My heart aches more than it ever has. I’m tired of hurting people. My life will never let me be ok. I’m back to the mirror and I hate standing here. I hate looking at this person. I’m crying so hard I can barely breathe. I’m dirty again and now I have the blood of the only people I had left on my […]

Have you ever had a moment where you’re just thinking, not about anything in particular.. and those innocent thoughts take a nasty turn? Next thing you know you’re talking yourself out of hurting yourself. Moments of insanity I like to call them. When something in your head shifts ever so slightly and everything you’ve stuffed and hidden inside for twenty years tries to get out? It over loads the brain and you just want to make it stop. You’d do anything for the memories and the pain to leave.

I’ve never been able to fully tell anyone the whole story. Why not a bunch of random […]

i can create a beautiful life in my imagination. i am able to share my imagination with people. however, i can’t live the beautiful life which my inspired imagination painted for me. my ideals that ostensibly obstruct my connection with humanity are strangling me now. i am a man who lives in a constant fear state. i live out my life in other worlds that are not real since i cannot live in this one. it’s not that i want to die so much as it is that i can’t live. i will always be half of a great man. never a great man. a […]

there is this constant hollowness in my chest. when i breathe, it fills up with pain. i miss her so much.

i have lost control of every aspect of what i am supposed to be. i want nothing except to hold her again.

i don’t belong here, but she doesn’t want me there either.

i don’t know what to do. i don’t know how to be. nothing matters to me anymore except my thoughts of her…

i unwittingly hurt her. and i have punished myself everyday for that. she knowingly hurts me. and i love her regardless. i know i can’t do this without her anymore.

my only regret is […]

Okay so my kind of suicidal is more like hours of disgusting contemplation over the most gruesome way to kill myself. But I’m not always suicidal, I am usually a very happy person. This feeling is only ensued when….I even get angry typing it out…..when my parents mention marrying me off. And I’m only ******* seventeen and I’m still a junior in high school (I started school late). I get extremely angry and my head starts throbbing (I can even hear it beating), and my body starts shaking like crazy. I go to an empty room and cry my heart and eyes out. I think […]

I’ve been thinking recently, I could just die right now, it’s the most truthful thing I’ve said in a while. I’ve stopped eating, I’m throwing it all away… there’s starving people out there, why should I eat, when they have to wait… Everyday, I’m breaking apart it’s tearing out every trace of my heart. Do you feel this too? When doubt hits you hard… anyway, where should I start?

I can’t say like i’m many of you. I’ve been pretty fortunate as far as life goes. But i dunno. No matter how well off you are there will always be a problem that somehow manages to get you. It’s pathetic

I don’t know why i carry on really. I used to like doing a lot of things and i had a lot of interests all over the place but i dunno what’s the damn point. It’s all useless idle bullshit. i’m bad at what i’m good at doing and i’m stupid to boot. I’m useless to society and i should just go kill myself except […]

Her story

Why wont he just come over. I thought in my head. WHY! WHY! WHY! The blood that keep dripping from my arm wouldn’t stop. In the back ground the song Easy by Rascal Flatts was on. I looked at the clock and seen it was 10 o’clock. I dropped to the groundn and started pulling on my hair, screaming and balling my eyes out. I am curled up into a ball not being able to move..

“I hate you!”

“ I know I’m sorry.”

“You don’t know mom! You are putting me in her just like a animal!”

“I’m trying to help you!”

Then the door slammed open. […]

I have attended four highschools, all completely different. With completely new teachers, new classes, and new classmates. With each school year I’ve been that girl who rarely spoke, the girl who just went to school then went back home.I had no life, because I never opened up and allowed people to get close to me.
Every new school year my mother says I’ll find some new friends who won’t stab me in the back, but every time I’m invited to hang out, my mother says no. She claims it’s because she doesn’t know these people, and I think ‘how will you ever know them if […]

This past summer my three sisters have repeatedly tricked me into seeing/being near my mother. Not wanting to make a scene I was as cordial as humanly possible. I decided to wait until summer was over to explain to my mother how I really felt.

Before this summer I had gone ten years without seeing her – for good reason.

She abused me. Not just a slap on the face, but literally beat me bloody. She would lock me outside for days with no food, give my siblings and I scoring hot baths, beat us until our skin was raw and tender to the touch, call us […]

If life’s worth living..i don’t see the worth