yup. i shall cut tonight. i think i may have hope to make it through another night but i must see some blood!!!!!!!!! im so mad at myself and all the stress i cause people. i make myself miserable. i dont deserve anything but scars and tears:/
I am 50 shades of fucked up.
I never let anything out of my control, I always have to be very sure that there isn’t anything outside of my reach. I’m manipulative, deceitful, and I’m so good at it that nobody would even believe me if I told them. Everyone thinks I’m sweet, shy, quiet. I’m emotionally cut off from the world. I can be cute and adorable to whoever I want to date me, and they will fall for me without even knowing what they are getting in to. I can be sexually manipulative, taking advantage of how easy it is for me to turn […]
I just feel like no one understands me, I don’t really understand myself but I just wish other people would. I get bullied alot, I get bullied because I am a girl who doesn’t feel comfortable in my own skin, I act like a boy, and hang around with boys because I just can not stand girls and i dont know why! its not that i want to be a boy, at some times i think i do but im not sure! but whatever i just dont get along with girls and its anoying because i get bullied for that. i get bullied for the way […]
I’ve written about it several times and have read other peoples take on it, the inability/lack of desire to get up and go after work.
I want to leave so badly; I work too many hours and I’m not paid for any time I spend here outside of 9-5. I come in hours early, stay too late, go in on weekends…
I want to get up and go now, but there’s nothing to go to. I can go to my mothers house and hang around with my kid brother. I could do something right and getting him on track with his schooling and tutoring.
I feel […]
Funny thing is the way I found this site was I searched on google “Methods for suicide”
Somewhere along the way,
somewhen in the last ten
Years
I lost my life
I took a wife
Who turned into
A truly cruel and vicious thing
Who causes pain
To hear me sing
My song of wubbery blubbery woe.
She kicked the soul out of my heart and I cannot get it back.
Goodbye.
I accidently cut myself while i was shaving and i couldn’t help but notice how fulfilling it felt to watch that stream of blood pouring down my leg and i swear i could have watched it forever if i didn’t have to get out of the shower. I finally understand what cutter’s mean when they explain how alive you can feel by seeing your own blood. Don’t get me wrong though,i will not start to self harm because of this.
i HATE how im so shy, cant even make new friends so i can get ruid of my old.. they’re so fucking stupid sometimes, cant they see that they things they say to me hurt me? or that i am stuck in this depression and they’re not even there for me.. not even close. they ignore my sadness like its no big fucking deal. tho one day i may very well never wake up. and they will all regret how they didnt even try to save me! my one friend steals my food tho she knows very well i have eating disorders, they call me […]
They say everyone has a PURPOSE in this life
I wonder what’s my purpose
Nothing makes sense…Now I’m in those moments when I just want to DISAPPEAR
I’m getting more and more SAD
I really don’t know what to do!
you might as well stop banning me because i will keep coming back.
h
there is a time when you cannot tell if you need a uplift in life from somebody else, or you should just end it. I have had many such times in my life when i had the feeling that there was nothing that could be done now except suicide, but there always was a helping hand – friend or relative who stood by me and told me not to do it. but this time it is completely different, i have no way to tell if i should do it or not. and the thing is such that i think that my head spuns each time […]
My Only friend told me last night shes feeling suicidal, Why? her too having to feel like this.. Then she said all these nice things about me being a good friend and all but she does’nt even know who that i’m suicidal and feel like her, I can’t tell her.. No body knows how i feel Just me.. I’m scared for her, Don’t want her to feel like this, Shes incredible, I hate this world i just want to leave but don’t want to hurt anyone
Do many people out there have like a suicide playlist that you play when your feeling at lowest I have songs that really open me up an d make me cry and think about what im plannning. main songs on it are
anthony and johnsons- hope theres someone
Johny cash – hurt
manic street preachers – suicide is painless
what songs really effect other people on here when feelin at lowest?
I don’t know from where to start,so I’ll tell you about my whole life with a few sentences.My name is Lyubo(16 years old boy)and I used to be a very happy person.I was waking up with a smile,and was going to bed the same way.I have had allot of friends and all of them loved me for who I am and everything was perfect:friends,games,doing sports,girlfriends, laughing all day long…When I entered high school I met some new people who were different in a cool way.First everything was going normal,but one day I saw one of them training with my soccer team,so I went there and […]
I am tired of stupid useless attempts. To many over to many years. I am recovering from a back injury and was given Hydrocodone-Acetaminophen 7.5 – 750 (quantity: 30). Also I an taking lunesta as a sleep aid. Can I use a combo of these two to overdose and die? And if so, please tell me how much? I am so tired…….Please !!!!
Sometimes you try so hard to save yourself but really all you need is a pat on the back. When the time comes that I don’t even have that I really ask what I ever meant to so many people. The stereotype of what it is to be depressed is something that I try to steer away from all the time, but unfortunately I can’t escape it. I’m writing this because I need someone to see it even if no one ever said anything to me about it, even if it somehow didn’t get posted while I thought it did. I’m 18 years old and […]
you feel bad in the pit of your stomach when you think that you might hate your family…
it makes you feel like a bad person.
but really, why should you feel bad?
anyone who makes you feel horrible almost everyday, dismisses you unless they notice you for a negative, for being in the wrong; people like that don’t deserve your respect or love. weather they be related to you or not, it shouldn’t matter. a person who is painful to be around, who makes you want to bang your head against a wall again and again and again… isn’t a person you need in your […]
I love my life.
The thought has crossed my mind way more than once. Its sad how I have no one to talk to about this. Even my own family. They would judge me. I have gotten close to killing my self but in the end I don’t have enough strength to pull through. And I am not sure if that is a sign or just me being scared. I feel alone, unwanted, forgotten. I was a mistake. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t born. My life is a living hell. With school and family I don’t know how to pull through. My family is falling apart […]
I think it’s really nice how some people on this site just wish others good luck, for there suicide to be quick and peaceful rather than trying to convince them otherwise and probably just make them feel more pathetic. It’s also very cute reading through the comments and seeing that someone out there has made a difference to somebody and helped them through. It’s also great to see people finding others out there who feel exactly the same as they do and others offering there contact details so they can talk things through. 🙂
On another subject I wonder how young some people are when […]