Nothing has changed since last night. Accept the fact that I’d cut myself last night. 50 on my right arm and 20 on my left. Some of them small. Others inches long. Some deep. Others just little pink lines. Some hurt, some don’t. Although, my arms look terrible. But, not like I care or anything. I’ve been listening to music or reading all day. Which is my usual routine. I haven’t cried yet today, which is amazing, since I usually wake up crying from my nightterrors. Speaking of which, I didn’t have one last night. Weird. Since I usually have 2 or 3 a night, […]

School started back up last week.

I’m glad. I know it’s a weird thing to say, but I am extremely greatful to be back in school, even though it is High School (AKA the suckiest place on the planet).

It’s just…..the summer changes me. When Im not in school I become this matrix for self loathing where all I do is stay home and mope around the house like the miserable human being I am by that point. You see, I tell myself that I prefer being alone, that the company of other people just makes me want too go eat dirt instead, but this is very […]

i was just trapped by someone.he got my mobile number and daily chatting and at last he proposed me…i am very stupid to accept him even without knowing him,his behavior,his background.i just believed him in such a way that i used to neglect my parents too..once he came to my house when my parents were not there..then he saw me in naked position..after that incidence..with in a few months he went out of country..one day my brother came to my house and i told him that i was loving someone and he wants to marry me after he returns to India.because of caste matter my […]

I’m sorry for the times i yelled
or pushed you all away
I’m sorry for the secrets I kept
and the things I couldn’t say

I’m sorry for the lies I told
to help me hide the pain
I’m sorry that I couldn’t fix it
Or get over feeling ashamed

I’m sorry that I needed you
more than what you thought
I’m sorry I always surrendered
in the times that we fought

I’m sorry I couldn’t understand
why you  felt betrayed
I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you
what would have happened if I stayed

I’m sorry you never believed me
when I got the courage to tell you the […]

hai this is a teenage girl with no hope in life and with depression.

I spent the majority of my life despairing at the fact that we are all born into slavery, the knowledge of which gets you ostracized and medicated. I gave up a long time ago on trying to live apart from this system, it’s impossible. 

Now I have gotten so bad with my despair of living that I find everything about being a breathing fleshy human being, absurd and just another prison. we are slaves to this body that we carry around with us. We must keep cleaning it, styling it, feeding it, exercising it. I feel sick and annoyed now every time I shave my legs, […]

you know how people say you have to be alive to feel, and there fore commting suicide solves nothihng because you cant feel that relief you so desperatly desire, well i say fuck it! surely to feel nothing is better to feel like how i do every day. why is death so bad, if its less painful than life? plus, id rather be a black hole of emptyness than just feel like one. who can judge and critisize you when your dead?

I was just recently raped by someone that I knew and it was all because I went on another binge. I just wanted to stay home and drink until Monday morning. Ended up making a really bad decision to attempt to make amends with someone that I had a falling out with. I bought a box of Burgundy, within a few hours it was gone. I got a drunk text from the guy and we decided that I should hang out with him and go to his house. I went down in the morning and he and I continued to drink. It got really bad […]

How can I stop feeling so down? I feel lonely, sad, helpless, hopeless, unmotivated… With all these feelings overwhelming me, I don’t have the energy to even try to better myself. How can I get past it?

I go to school then come home, everyday. I’m just an inconvienance, a burden If you will. I dont get it, I have little to be distruaght about.
Yes my arm is riddled with scars, but Ive been doing that before that age of ten their is little meaning behind it, It just feels good.

I dont have a reason to be posting this. If you guys read my previous post, I’m just saying i’m still here I guess. I dont plan on being here longer than a couple months, I just have to make final revisions on my suicide note.

I haven’t been on here in a while. Nothing has really changed. Accept that I’m in remition for Bulimia. Other than that, nothing. My self-harm isn’t an severe. But I still cut myself. My best friend came down last Friday to spend the wek. When she saw my scars, she freaked. I guess she didn’t believe me when I said that there terrible. Her and I had a good time, I guess. We went to the mall to go school shopping and we went to the movies. We also went on an 8 mile walk up the Erie Canal. We saw lots of grofittie. Some […]

okay, so its been about 3 days since i told the love of my life to stop keeping in touch with me. hes having a baby and i still cant get over that. my biggest msitake was getting involved and trying to be helpful for the both of them. i shoulda stayed out of it, but i figured i’d rather keep him as a friend then nothing at all. but that totally backfired, i have a boyfriend now, for like 2 months, and i dont wanna feel like im settling, he deserves much more then that, ugh, i know this site is for suicidal people, […]

Something recently came to my attention, which led me to investigate a situation. 

There is a person on this site that has opened a number of profiles all which have male and female identities, and which have completely different ages and circumstances. This person also gives out an email address and seems eager to be in contact with others more than just through this site. 

This information is fact, not speculation. However, this is not an attempt to expose this person but purely a warning to those who do exchange contact information with anyone on here. Be careful how much information you exchange and never go as […]

In my world,  I have just never understood why any of this is any good whatsoever. I don’t see one single thing in life that is actually worth anything, it’s all meaningless bullshit. This life hasn’t offered me anything that I want. I know it’s an age old saying usually associated with angsty teenagers, but I didn’t ask to be born, if I had been informed beforehand I would have turned it down in an instant. I’m sure I’ve been born wrong or there’s been some mistake with me because I have just never got it! Any person I talk to all I’m thinking is ‘wtf […]

i just need to get my feelings out in the open! i hate my life. like you know, theres the good days, but what a good day worth if it takes 100 bad days to get there? i used to have everything. i had all the friends in the world, i was smart, i did well, i always had fun, i had confidence, now i struggle with all and any work, and am failing everything, i have friends, but no consistent ones, and none like i used to have. but the friends i used to have, have finally forgotten about me, i tried staying in […]

Hello there,

Firstly, what a brilliant forum this is!

I have planned my suicide for over 2 years, I’ve been ‘depressed’ (but I would call it enlightened) for 12 years, each year it becoming more and more unbearable to live in this world. I gave up my job and have spent the past few months cutting my ties with my friends and family so that my death wouldn’t affect them deeply. My friends and family are all very much of this material existence anyway and so my death will not affect them anywhere near as much as this existence has affected me for 12 years. So, I’m […]

I came on here 8 days ago and wow what an amazing site! A site that really delves deep into the meaning of life and why we feel so suicidal. I never really gave any serious thought to all this before, I just accepted that this world felt wrong (and pretty shit) and I wanted to get out of it. Usually if you post anything online about feeling suicidal, you just get a ton of abuse from people, then I found this amazing site. But after reading many posts on here, I have been looking into loads of things. I recently found this and I […]

Ok so Im 16 years old, and I cannot live anymore. Ill start from the time I was 12 ( this sounds stupid since im so young) but I tried to kill myself when I was 12. Unfortunatly just wound up in a kids mental ward for a week. I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was around 8. Diagnosed with depression at 11, Seasonal depression at 14. I am pretty overweight too.  I used to be so skinny but was on abilify at one point and caused me to gain a substancial amount of weight ive never been able to get rid of. But […]

I’m 20 with an 8 month old son. That should be enough reason for me to want to carry on my life but I feel like it’s not enough to keep me here. The love of my life left me and I found all my happiness in him. My mother well actually my whole family and I aren’t even close. So there was no one here for me but him. He told me I was worthless and that he hated me.
He was the only person that could make me smile and bring peacefulness to my life. I miss him so much and I just […]

Please, I need some help. Forget about what causes it; I’m just sick of being in pain. I notice that I can have a few good days during the week if I’m lucky, but the rest of the time I’m in pain and I’m just tired of it. And it’s such a shame to throw away a potentially good life, but I don’t know what to do anymore.  I can really see how good it can be if my mental handicaps didn’t bring me down all the time and I just keep saying to myself, “It’s not fair.” I don’t know what this came from or […]