I’ve had depression since I was around 10 years old. My father used to bash me for every little thing, whilst my mother would just sit, watch and laugh. It’s been some years now, my parents did however get better, BUT that’s only after I finally grew the courage to tell the police, anyways just two days ago, I celebrated my 19th birthday, I thought about killing myself at the end of the night, but couldn’t mostly because 3 of my friends were with me till morning. Anyways, I try to move on, every day, but the memories always haunt me, and it’s not only […]
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Asshole
I’m 22 turning 23 this year. I should be over this and be able to handle things life throws at me. For the most part I can but lately, things have just been too much. Since young, I’ve been alone, left to fend for myself. My parents divorced when I was young and my mother got remarried when I was 11 to my stepfather. He wasn’t a bad person in general, it was just that I couldn’t live up to his standards. I be constantly called stupid, treated like I was worthless in the house and he and my mother would fight a lot of […]
hey guys, have you ever been made aware that you were going to lose someone and the person you were going to lose didnt want to talk about it or didnt want you to help them?almost like they wanted to die, just give up and die. and you cant really talk to anyone but that one person. and because they dont want to talk about it ect. you bottle it up inside, and its like a wounded dragon who cant lick its wounds. so eventually it lashes out to make people feel or aware of what your feeling, and of course you look like an […]
I forgot to tell many shitty things on my last post, like… I was really depressed bcuz many friends left me, and i chose to give my gf a better life in exchange for hell for myself. so i decided to go to a party with people i knew and the other 600 or something. late that night, i was real happy, not drunk, just a little bit dizzy. and it was reeealy cold outside, hey its norway:P but on the way i heard yelling, and i was like, god no, why… so i turned around and saw two elder boys come at me and […]
Dear God
I hate you, you’re an asshole. Why am I still alive? You can’t do this to me, this is not fair and you know it. You have millions for torture, why me?  Is this some kind of revenge? This is a mistake and you’re  wrong. Is not fair and you can’t do this, is the worst thing you’ve ever done. Why you didn’t kill me, as you promised? I hate you, I hate you, I hate you.
Hey. I’m 17 and find no happiness in life. I don’t know what else to do so I guess I’m just making a post on here. Uh… I guess it all started when I was a little Kid and my parents got divorced. I don’t know I just always thought of them as the perfect couple. I mean I always had huge suspicions that my mom was cheating on him when I was about six or seven.. turns out she was, but what was I supposed to do? My brother just called me a liar and he got mad whenever I tried talking to him […]
Yes; How long can I stay here?
I get treated like shit! There is no other way to explain it. I still believe my father hates me deep down.. for calling the cops on him because he was out of control.. Would you rather of been to prison for the rest of your life? Exactly! I saved your sorry ass. When you said to me ‘I hate you’ ‘Your dead to me’ ‘I don’t want you in my life’ & also called me a ‘*****’ ;; I just wanted to punch you! See why beer does to you?! This hasn’t happened once, its happened […]
I’ve never done this before but I need someone who understands me to talk to. Let me start by describing myself a little bit. So I’m a 25yo woman (kid at heart). I’m told by most I look like I should be a model (I don’t see it). I have an awsome personality very down to earth open minded and supportive to others and have a lot of knowledge about life do to my own exploring. I have no kids but the best dog in the world that I would take a bullet for and a man of 6 years. But ever since I can […]
Volcanoes are windows into the violent nature of our planet; what goes on beneath our feet, unbeknownst to all but those who poke at rocks. Our planet is violent because it was born into a violent, indifferent universe governed by determinism and scientific laws. It’s no wonder there’s a molten core driving the living systems of the earth.
Human beings are much the same. The only difference is that we’re not indifferent. Maybe the universe implicitly hates its own apathy. Who knows?
When I was 14, I watched my father drag my sister up a flight of stairs by her hair. He beat her with a […]
I cheated on my last boyfriend with the same guy twice.
Ive had sex with three guys who i were not dating.
I’ve had sex with 10 guys
I have a tattoo
Ive tried killing myself several times
Ive been wanted to die for the past three years
Im scared of the dark
I feel like I’m never gonna make in this world without a man
I want a secret chick lover
I love photography but think i suck at it
I wish i could be a stonner like my brother bc then life would be simple
I pushed a lot of people away
I […]
Hello all,
I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions. I doubt that anyone will be convinced that this was the right decision. They are all too caught up in what they believe is sane or what they believe is “good” or “happy”. I believe it is my right to decide what I do with my life. It is my goddam decision! We all preach to the rest of the world about “freedom”. Well, how “free” are we really if society can’t accept someone’s decision to end their life? The word suicide is shunned and scorned. A person who commits such a […]
hi. ive been chatting one guy for over a year. we are from different countries. he has invited me to come, so i did this, as i had an opportunity… we fell in love, but then i had to leave him for my country. while i was at his place, we were discussing our future etc. he promised to come to my place. i was crying so much while leaving him, but i hoped for the best because im mostly an optimistic girl. but when i was home, he just went crazy. he told me he didnt wanna live and contact me . then he […]
Once again tonight I can feel her clawing her way through my chest to grasp my throat and strangle me again. #2. The one who beats me down until I can’t take anymore. I’m trying so hard right now to fight her back. No, this isn’t multiple personalities.. I don’t think. If you read my last post, then you know what I’m talking about.
I talked to my friend tonight and she told me all about her new boyfriend. I feel like such an asshole for telling her to slow herself down and be a little more cautious. But then, at the same time, she’s telling […]
So basically, right now, I really do not see the point in me living any more, trying any more, even breathing anymore.
It all started to happen, when on day, my so called ‘bestfriend’ (Let’s call her beth) pretty much decided to stop liking me. But, i NEVER did anything to her.  I never bitched about her, never betrayed  her, I was a true best friend. She started telling a few people she don’t like me. Those people are my close friends, so they told me obviously. Now, I don’t have twitter, but she does. My other best friend (let’s call her Amy) does have twitter, […]
Today I started my “project”. I’m sick of the world, but my best and pretty much only friend wants me to stay with her until highschool, because she’s struggling with life as well. So I figured that if I slowly starve myself to death, I can stay with her, but as soon as school is out, the pain of starving will make it easier for me to just end life. I eat a lot so I’m not going to full out starve myself, but become majorly bulimic… Honestly, nobody on this site probably cares, but I just want to put it out there. I hate […]
uhm, I’m new to this sort of thing, so, Hello, I have been reading some entry’s today. What sparked my interest in finding this site is that my mother and father are giving me a hard time, my Grandfather died yesterday of a stroke and things before where quite good. Now all of a sudden my friends are leaving me alone, my mother is out to make my bedroom a prison for me and I have so much anger and hatered that I have been keeping in check for a long time.
Im 16 years old, the guy I liked has abandon me, my Grandfather is gone, all […]
I have been suicidal for probably the better part of 5 years and looking back at my life and where I am now I always ask myself “why didn’t I just do it then?” Nothing ever improves, I’m too much of a pathetic, fuck up to ever improve it. I realize a few people here will still say I have hope, but realistically take a look at my current life and take your mindset off of a suicide relief/help site mentality for a second. If any person in real life read what I am about to describe below they would most likely agree that there […]
Okay, i’m 13 years old. I have to repeat the 7th grade. I would’ve passed it, but i left my school 3 weeks early. That school stressed me out, to the point where i just couldn’t do it. i never wanted to go back there again. i only had about 2-3 friends at the end of the year. i like, pushed everyone away. i don’t even know how. right now, it’s about a month and a half into summer. i moved across town, so i’m going to be starting a new school. i lost connection with all my friends from my previous school, but like […]
iv had a lot of thing happen to me in my life but the one thing that iv learned is that the people and things that are closest to you are the things that can hurt you
the most.
just recently i left my dad (im 16 by the way), my parents are divorced and every since iv felt like an empty shell, not because they are divorced but because they
are such different people.
all i want is to be normal, to get good exam results and go to a good college and get a good job, but i cant, i cant because i […]
I hate the fact that I have things that hold me back from committing suicide. It’s just like the guilt and the people I meet and know and the future I might have that holds me back from doing it. I hate how I have these good times where everything goes smoothly and it seems like it’s going to be okay and then it turns to shit. I just hate it. I hate how one bad thing affects my whole day. How one person can call me an asshole and not to have an attitude when I react to somebody snapping at me and then […]