I haven’t been an avid writer on this cite, I haven’t been able to make any relationships with any of you, and I know this cite is to relieve oneself from the frustration of that constant feeling of undying depression, but I just wanted you all to know how thankful I am for all the help you have given me. Because even though you don’t know me, talked to me or even commented on anything I’ve posted, I have read your stories and I don’t feel alone. It’s been 7 months of suicide-free euphoria! Nothing has changed in my life, and if anything going through […]
Tag:
Depression
Oh , night you beautiful ,
when darkness is growing
over the Carpathians.
Eternal melody that awake
memories from past and dreams.
This is my deastiny – darkness eternal
Cold night embrace me in her beauty ,
when freezing mist drift
over Transylvanian woods
that my body loses all senses.
Rain into the darkness falls like blood
from the sky on the cemetery where drain.
Eternity , ilusions and dreams –
recognize salvation.
Is light of life thet dying in me.
Is ice of sorrow the crystal in my eyes.
Fate of death and salvation tonight
I hear sing.
Well it’s official. Went to the GP again today, and after a long talk with a very nice doctor (making a point of saying he was very nice because i’ve had some crappy doctors in the past) i’ve now been given a prescription for anti-depressants. I’m both happy and sad about this. Happy because finally, maybe, i might get some control over how i feel and sad because it’s actually taken medication to get this sorted out. Medication was kind of the option i was saving for last. In the UK medication isn’t usually the first option they jump to, but he knows the councelling […]
So yeah went to the councelling session today. I didn’t cry, go me. She insists on telling me how brave i am to have overcome this this and this, as always. Sometimes i think she just doesn’t know what to say to me. We talked about the fact that my education is a shambles. She suggested i should aim towards a degree in youth work, because of how i’ve always been so focused on helping others. That i should be aiming towards a caring profession. Social work and psychiatry is a no no, but if teaching isn’t going to work out for me then i […]
Hey, you.
I want to let you know that you’re not alone, and what you’re feeling now is something each and every single one of us can relate to. We’ve all felt at one point or the another, that what we’re going through is something that we can’t come out of, or too painful to see through. Though, even if you don’t believe in yourself, I believe in you.
I can’t and wont promise you that everything will be better, but I can promise you that can make it through tomorrow. You’re reading this now, aren’t you? You made it through today, and I promise that tomorrow will […]
continuation of things i dislike sorry im going crazy i need to get this out
by idunno
written by idunno
im panicking just let me get this out
(i dont mean for anyone to take these things too personally, i just need to share..)
i might come across really negative, dont let it effect you… im really a good person)
please feel free to give me some suggestions to add to the list, i’d really appreciate any feedback
i hate the doctors office
i hate cards (birthday, greetings….theyre so corny
the dentist
the phrase “how are you” and the conforming answer”well, thanks, yourself?”
hate how there’s little options as to what you get in life.
perfume
i hate how i have to lie to myself by thinking positively
i hate how i wanna runaway but i […]
so i have a doctors appointment for my depression on December 3rd….. that date runs through my mind everyday like its my birthday or something.. i think th appointment is just so the doctor can refer me to another doctor which is gonna be really disappointing. i used to be able to get through some days but now everyday is hard to get through. i have trouble keeping myself from going over board and my nights are worse. i feel anxsious for some reason and restless..i cant sleep at night until it gets real late and then im exhausted for school in the morning. i […]
Been preoccuppied with sp chat and FBSP rather than the original. My old home. I have endured much in my past i jsut want out. I need a gun. Fast. My moms boyfriend wants to take me to mexico so we could shoot guns and shoot drug dealers cuz i want the army to “shoot people”. I want to off myself is the real reason. I am triggered by special phrases that fuck me over most of the time. Whats going on? almost always triggers the voices especially when im insane from 12-4 am… I started crying right now cuz of the voices coming back […]
reading a lot of posts on here lately (i’m around, even if i don’t comment, i don’t like trying to offer advice when i don’t have any), seems like some of this site has degenerated into the petty bullshit that communities always do. just goes to show that even the most superficial of relationships break down in destructive ways. there’s no point in trying to connect with anyone, really.
anyway i noticed that most people say that this is a community of people who are at their end… people who have made multiple attempts, people who have been with depression for a long time. now i […]
Since people have not been following the sites rules I thought I would post about week 4 of the greatest sport in the world, the N.F.L. Hear me out though as it is also a post about depression
Ravens Vs Browns game was a no brainier for many people on Thursday night but the Browns did put up a good fight in the end.
Bills Vs Patriots will be huge as will the Jets Vs the 49’ers
Chiefs Vs Chargers will be a good match off game against to teams
and the Bengals Vs Jaguars will be great against two average teams fighting for top dog, with this sort […]
So I consumed alcohol for the first time, for no reason. I’m 14 years old, by the way. For the past few days I have not sense much depression, but mild anxiety. I have not eating that much except being in extreme thirst for the past two days, and today for the first time I had the strong urge to consume a fruity cocktail. (clearly has alcohol) And I’m sort of craving for more, but not going to.
Why is it that I had this sudden urge too? It’s a fruity flavor alcohol as well, and I added it onto my juice…
Stay awake you’ll be supprised.
At the beauty of the butterflies
They fly so high oh they have soared,
they know the pain you’ve endured,
they will never leave your plight,
scarlet wings look so bright,
leave back the nights of flooded tears,
and wake up without that frown.
The moonlight shines away your fears,
as the butterflies wipe away your tears,
so tonight when you start to cry,
remember the cutters lullaby:
hushabye baby you won’t be dead,
you have a pulse though your pillow is red.
your family hates you though your friends wont let you bleed,
just throw away that knife,
that’s all you need to do.
rockabye baby broken and scared,
 you know life won’t always be this hard,
time […]
Not feeling overly great today 🙁
Last night i broke down crying in front of my mum. A pile of crap just kept spilling out of my mouth about how i was afraid to leave the house and how afraid i was that she’d die (completely unfounded, it’s not like she’s terminally ill there’s no reason for that fear) and i just couldn’t stop crying. We were discussing the possibility of me moving in with a friend. Whilst i’d love to be out and be independent with a friend so i can actually have something resembling a normal life, i’m terrified to leave her. Almost like […]
I went through a lot since I last posted here. My parents found out I skipped a lot of school and when they asked me why I tried to tell them that I’m depressed, I even showed my mom this site. But she said that I’m making this up because I don’t want to tell her the real reason, which is not true. She even asked me if I even know what depression is. It’s been a while since then now and I actually felt better. I changed my school this year and I made a lot of friends in my new class. I actually […]
Basically I feel like I want to die most days. Some days I am ok, but I am a very depressed person, I let my depression consume me. I really need some anti-depressants, but I am still waiting for my health insurance to kick-in so I can see a psychiatrist. I believe in God, but I don’t understand why I feel bad enough to want to kill myself. I’ve been thinking about killing myself for years but something always stops me. I don’t think I will actually kill myself, but I have thought about how I would do it.
I am currently living in Philly, […]
Hey there. Was going to use a fake name but it’s too much effort so you can just call me Kurea. She’s a character from a japanese anime i like.
I found this site on google. I can’t even remember what i was searching for. “What’s the point in living” or something similar i suppose. But i found it and it intrigued me. Not alot interests me these days, maybe it’s the idea other people feel the same as i do. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone though, not even my worst enemy.
I guess we’re all depressed here. Well so am i. It’ll be 6 years […]
Hi, folks. ChildOfRagnarok is back again, so those of you who wondered whether I was still alive can breathe a sigh of relief (or put away your party poppers) now.
I don’t have much to share in terms of my life. I’m studying music production at a university, my songwriting has hit a lull, I’m still single (ladies), I have sleeping problems like you wouldn’t believe and my depression is returning to me. Nothing suicidal, just the usual death wish. Not much to talk about. Anyhow, I’m here to rant a bit since everybody loves it when I do that (ladies).
I’ve talked before about how I can’t […]
One of my friends told the head of my school everything. My depression,the cutting, the suicidal thoughts.
Now everyone is laughing at me, indirecting me and I can’t fucking be arsed with it. The girl who is supposed to be my bestfriend has tweeted twice about me,
“I want to commit suicide for no reason at all lol :):):)”
“Cuttin my wrists at the moment bcos my friends care about me x”
Charming, right?
It’s been quite a long time since I’ve been on here,
Life still continues to pass me by. I met a girl who I have been involved with for around 9 months now.
I have learnt a lot about her.. Heck I even love her. I didn’t think I would meet anyone again at least not after the relationship I was in prior..
She’s changed from the girl I originally met back in December. She isn’t the girl I fell in love with..
She dismisses my feelings like they are just disposable. She’s sent my heart into a deep abyss, of darkness, anger and hate.
I have so much uncertainty […]
Hi. I’ve never really done this before. I’m a thirteen year old girl. I used to have these huge dreams of changing the world, being someone. I still do, but it’s harder to continue. I have nothing wrong with my life. I have a good home life, things at school are okay I guess, no one has it perfect. I don’t know why, but I can’t stop thinking about cutting and committing suicide. I feel like it would be so much easier. Sleeping with out dreams eternally. I don’t know why I want life to end so badly. Lately I’ve been in my room a […]