Back where I started

I went through a lot since I last posted here. My parents found out I skipped a lot of school and when they asked me why I tried to tell them that I’m depressed, I even showed my mom this site. But she said that I’m making this up because I don’t want to tell her the real reason, which is not true. She even asked me if I even know what depression is. It’s been a while since then now and I actually felt better. I changed my school this year and I made a lot of friends in my new class. I actually wanted to try to reach for my dreams instead of giving up on them. But I got some bad grades so today my parents made me go to a science teacher to help me and everything was going great, but then I walked out of that room and suddenly I felt horrible again. I feel horrible right now. Like I was stupid to ever think I would actually reach anything in life, like I was stupid for even trying. Why am I suddenly feeling like this? Just a couple of hours ago I was fine, I don’t know what triggered this, because nothing happened. Everything was going so great and now I feel like I’m back where I started. I don’t want to feel like this again, it’s horrible to wake up every morning and not want to ever get up, to actually feel sorry that I didn’t commit suicide yet. I want this feeling to go away.