I’ve been diagnosed with Autism, probably Aspergers syndrome, two weeks ago. I had an evaluation meeting and they told me that I have that. I was completely in panic, because since november last year, I constantly hear: yeah, you do have autism (pdd-nos), no you don’t have autism, you maybe have autism. So, I was like: Do I have autism, yes or no? I want clearity now! But I didn’t tell them, because I had the plan to tell that at the evaluation, but before Icould say that, they already told me I DO have autism, and probably aspergers syndrome, but that doesn’t matter anymore […]
Diagnosis
It is amazing how much people judge suicidal people and it is not only the non suicidal. Within the ranks of suicidal the old are judging the young, the traumatized judging the better off and probably even a division within different diagnosis, depressed versus manic possibly. Everyone is trying to legitimise their own reasons, trying to be the most deserving of death. I do not think it matters why you choose to attempt suicide. Suicide is valid no matter what. Even if you did it to spite someone, it is just as valid. I believe they are all valid because life is meaningless. Death is […]
Hi. My name is Ashley.
I’ve been struggling with depression since I was 9 years old. I’m 19 now.
I recently got the diagnosis of Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder with a behavioural disorder due to drug and alcohol use at a young age.
Just over a month ago I gave up. I tried to commit suicide in the past but I never did it right, so naturally nobody took me seriously when I told them how I was feeling. This time was different. My lungs gave out, they had to do my breathing manually. When I woke up they sectioned me. I was put into my local mental […]
A week ago I had an intake with another mental health institution, because the therapy I have now at the moment won’t help me (the therapists told me after 6 months) and will end in a few weeks. Now I have therapy 5 days in a week from 9 am till 3 pm. The conclusion of the intake was that they think that a 24/7 therapy will help, but there’s a waiting list of 9 months for -.- . So they had the plan to observate me first, also 24/7, but another therapy. So in a few weeks I’ll have my intake for that 24/7 […]
As many of you know I went to my first therapy session today… it was amazing. I was diagnosed with anxiety, possibly bipolar, and possibly depression. Within 45 minutes this therapist understood me well enough to make this diagnosis. This is because I was completely honest which is what I advise everyone to do when getting help. It is the greatest relief and just knowing what is wrong makes me so much happier. Help is definitely scary, but if you find the right kind of help as I did, it is so worth it. I wish you all the best on your journey as I […]
FUCK THEM!!!
FUCK THOSE THERAPISTS!!!!!
I’m really mad right now…The therapists say that they want to make me better and they will do everything to make me better. Yeah right. I’ve been in therapy for ten months now there and it only got worse and worse. I have going to the part-time therapy (5 days a week from 9 am till 3 pm) for 4 months now, and I have reached none of my goals. And those therapists…. they really sucked!! I really feel like they don’t take me serious. This was a conversation I had a few weeks ago when I told the therapists that […]
I don’t feel like proof-reading this. Sorry if there are any errors or unclear ideas in this text.
I’m suicidal. I’ve wanted to end my life for several years, though I’m only 19 years old. I’ve been institutionalized twice, but I only had a short recovery after both. The medication they gave me stopped working, but things got drastically worse when I stopped taking them. Now I’m back on anti-depressants and mild neuroleptica. They worked wonders for about a week, but now I’ve gradually become more and more depressed and chaotic (in my mind).
Why is it like this? Why am I so fricking depressed all the […]
   Something that I’ve learned recently is that when somebody very close to you passes away, the process of grieving that we human go through never really goes away and it can come back at any moment and smack you down hard.
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    On July 24th 2008, the day after my 23rd birthday, my dad was diagnosed with ‘Small Cell Lung Cancer’ and it was devastating to my family. He’d had a pain in his shoulder and when he had gone to the doctors they suspected pneumonia. With the confirmation of cancer, he was told they could not cure it but could prolong his […]
I have been having anxiety attacks since I was six years old. When I was 12 I had my first episode of major depression and at 13 made my first plan to kill myself. At 16 I was diagnosed with clinical depression and at 19 I was hospitalized for 2 weeks. Around the age of 30 I had clinical anxiety added to my diagnosis of long term depression. Now I’m nearly 40 and the pain never ends. Sometimes it recedes enough that I can laugh but I’m never really happy. The latest episode of major depression started four months […]
I’ve said a million times that I would rather be beat up than to hurt emotionally, but it never seems to work out that way. As I found out on Thursday night, even if you are beat up physically, your heart will still hurt.
I am not getting any younger. I am 29, I have a seemingly great life; I have a full time job at a great company, I have a wonderful apartment near my job, I have my two cats that I live with, some great friends, a supportive family… But there is one thing missing – a relationship with myself.
I am constantly trying […]
So sick and tired of life. It’s a miserable existence day after day, seven attempts this year and no avail, looking for number eight.
Lost my job, my baby, my marriage, my home….I’m an alcoholic, unemployed, lonely, just don’t want to go on any further.
Don’t want to live with my diagnosis either, I’ll never have a normal life, normal relationship, no nothing. I’ve lost my chance at love, there’s no chance for happiness, my life is an absolute joke.
I’ve got my plan in place and a time…don’t bother with the whole “life is precious” or “God wants you to live”, because if there really is […]
I just spent 19 days inpatient and am likely going to go to partial next week. I have bipolar type 2 with psychosis. I was misdiagnosed as having major depressive disorder with generalized anxiety. I also have PTSD. Please, anyone who is considering suicide, get help. Get a diagnosis, get treatment. You are stronger than this.
When I was diagnosed bipolar in 2007, my life was greatly devastated. Since 2002 I was taking online screening for depression on a pretty often basis and finding I was considered “severley depressed.” Now I was being told that sometimes I’m extremely happy? When have I ever been happy? I was hospitalized for 3 days a day after the first Christmas my Grand-Mother passed away when I was diagnosed by this hospital as bipolar. I could understand if I may have falsey put on a smile when saying hello to a nurse in passing but, it doesn’t even sound logical that I was happy. I […]
I’m a 16 year old boy who is thinking about Suicide all the time, doesn’t matter where i am or what i’m doing. I don’t have a standard story, mabye i can cry about having disvorced parents or being bullied in primary school but that aren’t really reasons i contemplate about suicide. I’ve never had therapy, i think none knows how i am… I’ve tried a “online” therapy “test” and as diagnosis came out i am severely depressed. I’ve propably been depressed since i was 14 but none saw it, neither did i.
When i read post on this site i always see the sentence: Life gets better, […]
This one’s pretty long, sorry if I bore anyone. I should preface by saying that I’ve been depressed for four years. I was formally diagnosed with major depressive disorder January of this year, but I knew long before. I’ve never had a true friend, anything even close to a relationship (been led on a few dozen times), and I feel alone constantly. Recently my diagnosis was changed to suggest the cause of my pain is ADD. I’m not sure if the doctors are right, but amphetamines are helping a bit lately. This is the story of the last eight months or so, from the first […]
Hello again –this is my second post and will be my last —this is the last month i will be alive—i can barely walk anymore and being stuck in my appt losing my mind seriously and figuratively.–m.s is a horrible disease-it doesnt kill you persay but for some like me you watch you life die infront of you and your body stops working for you and only provides pain. and you cant even hope to keep your  mind because that goes to–so to me it takes the point away from life when i cannot live it or even remember what has happend what i  did other […]
And that I’ll fight my corner, Maybe tonight I’ll call ya, After my blood turns into alcohol, No, I just wanna hold ya….
So… Hi Guys :3
I know, It’s been a while. And quite a lot has happened… :/ I don’t know whether or not I have told you that my mental health has gotten worse, But hopefully going to see a doctor about that… Finally get the crazy diagnosis. :/
So, My birthday was good :0 so **** in fact that i decided not to kill myself, If I could I would. Things just got worse after that, I got into a relationship with this guy called Aarron. But in the four days D: that i was with him it made me realize how much I love my […]
It is my intention to leave this life.
To start, I would say that I am not in that space where suicide helplines call “pain is greater than capability to bear.” I am not doing this on the spur of a moment’s depression or of a single terrible setback. No, none of these apply to me.
Let me share my story.
(1)
I was physically abused as a child. My father had rules that were only known to him. His mercurial moods did not help. From as young as pre-school (I do not remember exactly when they started), he would beat me, with his hands, with sticks, with canes. […]
I’m almost 17 and I’ve had social problems my whole life. I BELIEVE I might have a personality disorder, although I don’t really know. The problem with getting diagnosed, treated, etc is that I’ve grown accustomed to faking a lot of interaction with people. I’ve seen four or five psychologists and stuff now, with no real results. Most of them just sent me off saying I was fine after five or six visits. I know I’m not ‘fine’. I used to have anger management when I was really young, like 8 or something. Then later on (still age eight) my mother tried to kill herself. […]
I’m sure anyone reading this has heard it all before. I’m tired of getting up in the morning, droning through a job filled with office politics, unable to help my brain injured son further and unable to cope with his pathological lying, his lack of motivation, his manipulation and more.
I’ve lived my life for my son for 34 years. Since he was 11 years of age, and a diagnosis of psychiatric disorder, he has been in and out of institutionalization (juvenile detention x2, an adult life of crime, culminating in a brain injury from violence at age 23, then more psychiatric detention and jail as […]