The beginning of 2016 was when I got myself together and had my three beautiful children full time I was working as well. I shelters many people family or not and fed the mouth of people who talked bad upon me. I’ve never been the perfect mom sister daughter but I always made sure everyone was good and taking care. October of 2016 was when I experimented with a certain drug. No the drug did not ruin my life but it changed me as a person. […]
I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. I’ve committed crimes that I dare not mention (I don’t feel like having the police at my doors), but just think of the three worst crimes you can think of, and I can assure you I’ve done them. (in case you can’t think of any, here’s a few: murder, rape, drugs).
I know people say things like, “It’s never too late” or “Just because you feel like you’re a burden doesn’t mean others see you that way”. I simply do not think those sayings apply to my life. Can you honestly say that the world wouldn’t be […]
I’ve left my boyfriend… i’m still addicted to coke…
I’m really moving on… trying to take another step…
But i’m still dead inside
Somedays i just really want to die…
No reason to be too depressed…
But also no reason to be happy at all…
Right now i’m thinking of hanging myself on a sheet…
I’m sad… i’ve found a job, i’ve found someone who likes me…
My only struggle is with alcohol and coke
Don’t have a reason to use drugs or to drink so much…
I don’t know if i’m gonna be happy someday
I want to disappear , i want to die… […]
Well… I’m a Brazilian boy, 18 years old (English is my second language, but i’ll try my best here.)
My first attempt of ending my life was in 01/01/2014, i tried taking antidepressant pills, i’ve ended up in the hospital for 3 days… my father commited suicide when i was very young, my mother never talks to me, when i was 7 years old i was abused by an older boy… later on i’ve became homossexual… no one knew about all this shit ’til 2 years ago…
i’ve dated a boy who is trying to help me now, i think sometimes that he’s the only person […]
I am drinking a beer. I have dried tears on my distant face. I am reminded of the most severe pain I’ve ever experienced. I have glimpsed into my father’s mind and seen a tiny bit of the damage that relentless emotional damage, drugs and physical pain were causing him: before he decided that he did not want to deal with any of it anymore. “…made me turn to drugs and use the needle and my drug addiction to destroy myself..” “Makes me want to be left alone and not bothered by people.” “My moods are usually controlled by how often I think of my […]
A psychologist gave me a booklet for ‘the bereaved’ to inform me on what I would feel in the coming weeks/months/years. Seeing as every time I start to read the shitty booklet I bawl my eyes out, I’ve decided to write about what I am feeling and hope to feel in the coming weeks/months/years. I hope that in writing this, others who may find themselves in a similar disastrous situation can get some sort of comfort in knowing that shit luck affects a lot of people.
First of all, my boyfriend committed suicide. We were at my house arguing, it was an ongoing insecurity fight that […]
I am 18 years old, I am a recovering intervenes drug addict , I was shooting up morphine and oxy cotton when I was 16 resulting in shooting up heroine at 17 , just months ago I came to Nova Scotia to become sober , in all honesty I travelled from one province to another to make some money selling my ass for some cash, it turned bad and I ended up showing on my Aunts doorstep , strung out begging not to send me back to newfoundland. where the depth of my addiction began , Eventually things began to change around here , I would […]
I might kill myself. I think I am going to use the “exit” bag method with helium as my choice of gas. I can’t take the constant pain, guilt, worry, and sadness anymore. My parents are so disappointed in me. I am everything they never wanted. Unlike my younger sister, my grades are poor, I’m a drug addict, an overall failure. My dad constantly reminds me about how he refuses to pay for my college expenses since I am such a bad student. Constantly asking me, “Which college do you think you will be accepted into?”, in a rude tone. My dad always makes snarky […]
I was 15 when I tried to kill myself. It was march 29th 2011. I had been in a deep depression since I had run away from home a little less than a year prior. My parents were drug addicts and my dad was a felon and a drug dealer. My mom was a paraplegic and a slut who fucked everyone and anyone. My older sister was a sociopath that murdered our rabbits and one of our dogs and tried to kill me with an axe which ended up with a trip to the hospital when I was only 5. Now that we have a […]
so what to do at 37 and now lifes grenade explodes in the form of a car crash? not that is has been rough at all. just fought drug addiction for 20 years. went to prison for almost 8. finally think the pin is back in the device and BOOM! i almost die. 3 months of hospital, i now have 20+ inches of scar tissue and 47 peices of metal in me. cant walk right, left hand is almost useless and im just never going to be the same. Â life is good. i used to say andthink that. i have a new outlook. daily i […]
Well i want to kill myself. Its been that way for a few years and i mad 1 attempt so far (not recently). If been abused a little as a child, my parents divorced due to my dads drug addiction when i was in 4th grade. I never had a single friend till sophomore year in high school. Every one hated me even tho i was the quiet sit in the corner kid. I was extreamly bullied till high school. The reason im still here is because the 1st friend i made in high school made me think that life is worth living. Eventually i […]
Nobody understands why cutting is an addiction. Nobody understands why when I’m angry or sad, my first thought it to bleed, my next is to feed my drug addiction. Nobody understands that I’d be able to quit drugs easier than I would be able to quit cutting. I wrote this last night in hopes of trying to eliminate the confusion. I hope this poem is acknowledged.
Have you ever been hurt?
But I don’t mean for real.
I mean the kind that can’t be seen,
the kind only you can feel.
You keep it to yourself
the feelings you’ve come to accept.
But still, every time […]
I have survived abuse, car accidents, living in gang riddin, drug-dealing neighborhood as a child, being married to a cop and having him take my kids and do weird/mind fuck type things to get back at me for leaving him, jail, drug addiction, homelesness, being outcasted from any blood family I new of (I didn’t grow up knowing family really). IDK I’ve been through a hell of alot and all I hear from people that I am strong and what am I gonna do with my life. “I have soo much potential” I’m told.
I’m sick of being here. I am sick of the […]
Its not even like I’d care .. Almost everythings gone anyway . I had my parents taken away when I was 2 because of drug addiction . All my biggest hopes and wishes were taken away when I was 8 and I realized “mommy” & “daddy” don’t think I’m any more important than their drugs and new boyfriends/girlfriends . When I was 11 , leuchemia took my grandma from me . This past winter my past caught up with me . All my memories started rushing back and I started acting differently . Because I’d changed so much , all my friends were taken from […]
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