It must feel good to be perfect and superior to everyone else…tell me, what does that feel like? I’ll never know…ever.
I watch you listen to me,
but do you really hear me?
You use that sweet tone of voice, I’m sure that everyone gets,
I want to trust you, but your eyes are full of judgment and pity.
I am seeking help, but I am sure this is going to doom me.
I have nothing to say, I am choking on my tears.
I am so desperately looking for the solution to fix this problem.
All I do is hurt people and ruin my relationships. I’m a god awful person who just fucks up everything. I hurt everyone. I judge like I’m better. I wish I had the strength to pull the trigger last year
Ever since I was a child, I was never really happy with who I was. I always looked at other people and wish I could be them. Everyone is smarter, funnier, wealthier, stronger, more attractive, and/or just better off than I am.
When I was about 7, and later at age 11, I was sexually assaulted multiple times by two different people (a cousin and a fellow Boy Scout). I’m still traumatized by those experiences, but I believe I deserved it because I never said anything to stop them.
When I first developed depression, I started self-loathing. At age 13, I was diagnosed with a medical condition […]
Everybody else tells me they’re depressed because they feel as if nobody would care if they died or not, they think they are worthless and they hate every fiber of their being, they feel as if there’s no potential in their life, and something has sparked their depression such as someone fucking with their life and such, but for me… I’m different. I mean, I’m an athiest so I believe that there’s nothing after death, no pain, no enjoyment, just eternal peace. I believe this because our consciousness is from blood getting to our nervous system and brain, so everything around us is, well, life […]
The world we live in are filled up with a bunch of friggen hypocrites. Oh I’m a leech am I for costing taxpayers money because I am having a difficult time holding down a job but at the same time I get put on suicide watch if I say I want to kill myself to save everyone the burden of having me around. Hypocrites!
I don’t like humans. My main goals in life are to never reproduce and die. Euthanasia should be legalised, therefore all of the nice people don’t have to put up with others’ bullshit. Going to war against others and killing them is okay, but suicide is completely disrespectful to humankind. That just makes me want to die more, because I fucking hate humanity. Everyone has about as much meaning as a rock or a ball of crap that a dung beetle rolls up. People believe in God because they can’t handle knowledge. Everyone likes to be stupid. Just look how popular drugs, alcohol, and sex […]
Dear Mom,
I am very sorry for the hurt I am about to cause you and everyone who has loved me. You have been the best mother a daughter could ever hope for and I know I would not have lasted this long if it was not for you. You know I have been battling my depression for as long as I can remember. The medication has evidently not been working and I just want the pain to end. I don’t belong in this world and I don’t see things changing anytime soon. I just want you to know that it was never my intention to […]
🙂
Im sorry for tons of posts but I thought everyone needed to be happy to I found this very beautiful, insperational picture of a fox that just makes me happy.
I can’t shake this feeling. I can’t stop crying and the tantrums keep getting worse. I recently started seeing a doctor, and all I do is cry but I feel relieved talking about my pathetic life to someone who can help me. Now I face something that frightens me, I’m only allowed 8 free sessions because I don’t have insurance. I feel like everyone leaves me, I’m afraid I’ll get comfortable only to lose my doctor. Everyone walks out of my life, I can’t stand people and yet I hate being alone. I don’t know what I want out of life, and I want to […]
I’ve been through it all. The medications. The Treatments. The therapy. At some point everything became blank. After I visited my father, who criticized me down to the last bit until I realised, I am nothing. I failed at all my suicide attempts. They said everyone who survived an attempt is always greatful. I wonder, when did it all go wrong. For as long as I remember, I was just…never real. We are all not real. I tried my best to always do what my parents wanted. I just wasn’t smart enough. I tried to be the best. But I’m nothing. My existence is a […]
those of you who know the character in the play hamlet know what happens to her. it sort of sums up what is going on in my mind. as in i feel like i am losing it. the swing of emotions i am experiencing is exhausting. anger, deep sadness, tears that come from nowhere, and an urge to kill myself. while i am supposedly making progress by letting myself express these emotions, it is the unpredictability of the whole mess that is getting me. i have been suicidal since i was a child so of course that will emerge from the pit as well. i […]
you know what is SO fucked up? is that after someone commits suicide EVERYONE around the person is saying things like “oh she was such a great person” and “if she had only called i would have been there to listen, to help” but you know what? it’s fucking bullshit. i did what a suicide support website said – i reached out, far, on a limb and i thought hard of the smartest people i know, the people who have provided guidance and direction in the past. i decided to reach out to my aunt who i haven’t spoken to in over 10 years. i […]
A child that has been mentally bullied and raped may fall into depression. Who would’ve thunk that? Well, apparently no one.
My mom was there. I called her to come and help me but she didn’t do anything. Why didn’t you do anything? You could have saved me then and you could have saved me now.
You too, big brother. You’ve been there in your room, ignoring the screaming, turning your music up so you don’t have to do anything.
Dad, you’re excused. You were at the office all day. That’s not the best way to raise a child but you had to make some income, […]
hey im new .
im emily and im always feeling lonly and i did stop cutting cuz it wont do nothing . I have so much feelings bottled up in me and i dont knoe who to tell bc mostly people dont really care but i found this site . My voice well be heared and thats all i really wanted so if u need help or anything im here for u and everyone else . So i guess go follow me on instagram @emily.guilbert .
Bye .
I didn’t even care who would get to be the driver on our new car tonight. Of course I would’ve loved to drive, so – without thinking about it – I took the offer to gamble about it. *sarcasm on* Just by empirical observation of past gambles I should have known that against all odds I somehow manage to lose every single time. *sarcasm off* After my one sister won the first round to drive on the first way, my other sister and me should have gambled about the way back from the restaurant, but I refused. That wasn’t the best choice obviously, but in […]
So many posts I read on here, so much loneliness, emptiness, self anger and hatred I wish I/we had the opportunity to meet one another and assist each other through these times. The powers that be know I can use a friend! Were all destined to die eventually its just getting through the “now” that’s so fukin difficult. I know I wish I had an understanding individual to chill with. Well back to my lonely world, to those that plan on killing themselves, good luck and to everyone else I hope you have an understanding friend to turn to!!! Good day all
I have depression. Everyday it’s a big struggle to get up and out of bed. Part of the reason is because it’s near impossible to fall asleep between the tears and the suicide plans I plan but am too tired to act out. I’ve been on antidepressants for 6 weeks but the give me horrible mood swings and have made me feel worse… I’ve stopped taking them until my doctor can prescribe me a new kind, but that’s not until next week… I’m tired all the time… Everyone says that it’s because the stress and anxiety from the depression tires you out… My ex boyfriend, […]
I’m unable to continue this miserable excuse for an existance. No one will wish I hadn’t and I have no will to live. I’m more than slightly sure that I do not deserve to piece myself through this meager existance. Goodnight everyone… See you in Hell….
Anther year since I tried to kill myself. Life’s pretty good. I’ve been talking to one of my friends who recently expressed interest in me. I like them, everyone thinks they like me. But I’m scared, scared they do and scared they don’t. They have texted me into the night, they’re very sweet and considerate and they want to help me, but I’ve swallowed my secrets and depression for so long I can’t give them up. Life is pretty good. I still want to die. That irrational persistence is the mark of a true suicidal person, I think.
I need a plan. If I don’t […]