I know. I know I’m only 13. I know I can’t be in love. I know I’ve never even gone out with the guy. But I think that, honestly, I love Trevor. But he doesn’t love me. This is why I don’t let my feelings take over. They always make me go back to liking him. He likes Kendall. Well, I mean, he should, considering they go out, but I wish he liked me. I know that everyone would just call me a slut for liking him, but you know what? I know what I am and what I’m not, so I don’t care. I […]
IÂ sit there in the cafeteria
He sits on the floor he’s talking i cant hear him, my visions bluring black around the edges
I’m brought back because of an intense pain from my hand, my ex boyfriend yet again had bit me, i know he just flirting… that he’s only using me..
I smile laughing telling him it doesnt hurt, he doesnt realise he saved me from another embaressing seizure, he smiles biting my harder i ignore it typing on the computer with my left hand as i try to complete a school project. He lets go and we sit their for a while. I feel him bite […]
I went to open mic like I always do. waited, waited waited. and finally i went up to read my poetry. and hey guess what, I collapsed on the floor. Turns out (these are the doctor’s words) “You need to eat food, without food you’ll die. here have a carrot.” like dude wtf i’m not eating a carrot, I don’t like carrots. bye. sigh being in the hospital is quite fun. I’m just glad I have my phone so I can get on this site. otherwise I would try jumping out the convieniently placed window by the bed. And of course the nurse got all […]
Well, I’m not really sure how to do this.. But, here goes.
October 7th, 2010, exactly a week after my 14th birthday, I attempted to commit suicide. I shot myself in the head with a 22 Rugger handgun. I felt as if nobody cared, like something was wrong with me because I just could’t be happy no matter what I did. I didn’t want to feel this way but, I couldn’t control it. I felt like a burden on my family, I felt as if it’d be easier on them if I just disappeared. That day at school, all I could think about was, “What […]
Whatever it might cost, a look into the future,
Forsaken but not lost,
Nor given in to torture,
Like noises in the wall, no one will notice,
You know you will fall
And drown in misfortune.
Crowned by the doom, you almost see it coming,
To stand or to give up,
You can figure nothing.
Then you retrace your steps, and when the world rejoices
You stumble back and forth,
You’re torn between the choices…
And the disaster gleams, beckoning the reverie
You’re dwelling into dreams
You know astral travelling,
Far away from scorns and senseless agitations
You’re breaking into thorns
Of […]
I wrote an essay on how to be happy and remain in that state of mind no matter the situations in your life. It basically focuses in changing your mental process. i believe that if we learn how to control our thoughts, we can control our emotions and actions. For example, if you catch yourself having bad thoughts, learn how to replace them by good thoughts. Its a long process but it can help you if you put effort into it and continue to practice it with patience and belief. Some of us have gone through the worst things in life, in fact, depression and […]
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Please give me your best advice
I am a 33 year old mother of two, I was with the father of my son & daughter for 12 .1/2 years. I was 16 when we started our relationship. He was 10 years older then me and how I found out was though finding his driving licence as he told me when we first met that he was 21:- (26)was the truth  even then he still tried to say it was a fake. I should of realised then what he was all about but being only 16 young and being my first love I was blind!! I […]
I started cutting again. My friends didn’t think I had the balls (pun intended since I’m a girl) well surprise mother fuckers. And I couldn’t get the smile off my face since I saw the blood. And razor, its been too long my old friend.
About 5 years ago my youngest sister was molested by my “mothers” husband. She was only 7 years old at the time and I was 11. As you could imagine I didn’t know what to think at the time. If the claim was true or not, I wasnt there. Of course she told her schools guidance counselor, she needed to tell someone. Next thing I knew, some lady from social services picked me up from school and not knowing what was going on I asked her if she knew. Til this day I really have no idea why she got all in my face about […]
tick tock tick tock.. the clock made it seem like life was passing so slowly. I sat there looking at myself in the mirror as the tears rolled down my face. Pill after pill I began to feel sleepy. I had the rope and knife next to me. I got sick over and over. the blood dripping down my sides never felt any better. As I fell asleep I was hoping I would never wake up again. but I did.
Isn’t that funny. I made you dinner, ironic uh? I couldn’t see your face though but I knew it was you.