Tag:

get better

I feel like everyone is telling me to just roll over and die!

by iamafingloser 4/3/2015

written by iamafingloser

There is nothing good about me.

1) I am bangladeshi and still live in bangladesh.

2) I am autistic.

3) I am 19 which means almost 1/3 of my life is already over (because bangladeshi men usually live 60 years and women 70 years).

4) I am a male and I am inferior to females.

5) I am only 5’4”.

6) I am fugly and brown.

7) My parents are fucking poor, make only about 20k a year.

8) I have no skills because I am autistic and thus I have no job and no money.

9) I am the stupidest human to have ever existed.

10) My head is super small. only 9 inch […]

4/3/2015 22 comments

Physically abused for 30 years

by BentBroken 3/29/2015

written by BentBroken

Has anyone been physically, emotionally and verbally abused and dumbed-down by their parents from the day they were born all the way into adulthood?

What does one do when they’ve been made useless by their parents and can’t make it on their own?

30 years of waiting for things to get better… just hanging in.

I don’t see this ending in a good way.

3/29/2015 3 comments

Shared Stories

by imlosingit 3/23/2015

written by imlosingit

I hope you read this and know you’re not alone
That the pain in these words you realize as your own
when you look at your scars bleeding red
know that I have them too
That I just wanted to feel something other than alone
I thought I deserved it
I truly did
As I shaped jagged lines I would scold myself for not being better
for being such a waste of life
but the pain always came back
No amounts of cuts changed that
So stop
now
I’ve been on that ledge
I know how much it hurts right now
I can’t promise you […]

3/23/2015 3 comments

To Quit

by meepmeep 3/23/2015

written by meepmeep

I’m very, very tired. I can’t live every day debating whether I should live or not – if I continue living, it’ll stay like this. If I die, I don’t have to deal with this. I know you say it’ll get better, maybe it will, I won’t live long enough to find out. For some reason, I can’t feel happy, even though there’s been cheerful people in the atmosphere. I’m very, very tired. Shall I go about eternal slumber?

3/23/2015 2 comments

Things I want to tell you guys

by Chrissyjo 3/23/2015

written by Chrissyjo

Lately, before I go to sleep, I read SP. I don’t do this because I am morbidly curious or just plain nosy, but because it helps me to realize that I am not alone. I don’t often comment (although I want to) because I honestly don’t know what to say. I want to hug you close and feed you comfort food and watch a good movie with you and make it all go away. Really, I should have the words because I work in the medical field and am surrounded by smart, caring and compassionate people every day, but guys…I’m so BAD at knowing what […]

3/23/2015 14 comments

venting

by paingoaway 3/22/2015

written by paingoaway

i realized i am not alone with my slightly suicidal feelings, loneliness, and sadness. If worst comes to worst and there is no afterlife, at least there is peace at the end right? And if there is a heaven, I think God would open his arms after us suffering so greatly. its rough, but hey, thats the truth. last year i dealt with some pretty rough stuff, and i hope it may get better. I learned alot about my illness, and realize there are many others out there with things, and are too poor to have them fixed. i feel better than i did last […]

3/22/2015 1 comment

To Those Who May Have Lost Hope

by katie_bear12 3/19/2015

written by katie_bear12

I am going to tell my life story up to today. There is a point to this, so just bear through all of this. I promise, it may be worth reading. I’ve been familiar with sad things for my whole life. When I was five, my mom kicked my dad out because he was an alcoholic and a drug user; he also treated her very badly. I remember seeing him occasionally after that. I didn’t realize what my dad was into until I was much older, where I grew up watching him drink and abuse his girlfriend. In 2nd grade, a man moved in with […]

3/19/2015 5 comments

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by comomequieranllamar 3/19/2015

written by comomequieranllamar

I’m starting to think that is not fair that I have to live with all this pain and anxiety just because of not hurting my mum and sister by killing myself.

So now I’m really afraid.

I study, or used to, Psichology. I rationally understand what’s going on with me. I know that it must eventually pass. That’s what I keep telling myself. But it just doesn’t feel like it will actually get better.

Some days ago, one of my sister’s friend lost her father by suicide. My sister begged me to never do the same.

When my mums boyfriend commited suicide a year ago, his own son came […]

3/19/2015 1 comment

Spare me the ‘confidence’ boosts

by daikirai 3/14/2015

written by daikirai

one day left. Its quite nice being so numb, i no longer think so much and no longer care about how it may affect her and everyone else. without her even being near me i can tell how hurt she is, i wish she would just let go, it would be so much easier…..people always say it’ll get better, well it never did it just got worse and even now people say it but they still don’t realise for some it never gets better, it just gets worse. I wonder whats after…..death, is it worse then this? Or better then this?

3/14/2015 1 comment

I really want things to get better so..

by broken43 3/12/2015

written by broken43

3/12/2015 6 comments

What is there left to do?

by falling_soup 3/11/2015

written by falling_soup

I feel so alone and like there is nothing left for me to do anymore. I do not see a point of me being here. I am going to plan things accordingly.. Until then.. I am going to do what ever it is to be okay but I need to figure out a better method. I do not like to put a lot of thought into it because sometimes I get scared about what ever it is that could go wrong and I would still be here. I hate that I have to suffer inside and that no one at school or at home sees […]

3/11/2015 1 comment

I need help

by Josie 3/7/2015

written by Josie

im so scared of what i might do like i don’t wanna go to school anymore because i keep getting beat up and i don’t wanna leave my house i don’t know whats outside and I’m scared something will happen! i just wanna cut even when I’m happy i wanna cut i should be dead? am i worthless? i just wanna get better but i also just wanna die! is this normal? am i normal? i don’t think can do this for much longer…

3/7/2015 4 comments

Numb

by beyondsad 3/6/2015

written by beyondsad

I’ve always been a sad person. Recently I thought I had finally found happiness and then out of nowhere he left me. I hate feeling so petty. The man I love left me. So what. It happens every day. Yet I have never felt more sad. I feel like a turtle that is on its back and can’t turn myself back. I finally let myself be myself and he left. One day we were fine and then the next we weren’t. The wind has been knocked out of me. I wish I could understand. I wish I could breath. I wish, I wish , I […]

3/6/2015 2 comments

can’t do this anymore

by lissbabe 3/6/2015

written by lissbabe

what’s the point anymore? it’s not like anything will get better, might as well just leave the world. Being in care is starting to hurt me physically and mentally, maybe i should either take the leap to end my life or maybe i should just end up going to different care homes every year or month, i cant even handle my emotions in this home, i dont fit in i’m not appart of their family and never will be, should i just end it? Please someone help me i’m asking for your help please i’m begging

3/6/2015 2 comments

happier than ever to suicidal in a matter of weeks

by survival0302 3/3/2015

written by survival0302

Six months ago – In August 2014, I was perhaps happier than I’ve ever been and fulfilling a number of long-held dreams. I’m 45 years old and have a beautiful wife and daughter. I had been through some tough times before – nothing major – made some sacrifices and got through by focussing on the future. I was in the process of completing some big changes in my life that I had worked long and hard for.

Unexpectedly, a perfect storm of mostly random events and coincidences triggered a tidal wave of panic in me. Before I realized what was happening, I threw away a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that […]

3/3/2015 6 comments

Alienation

by Kasabian 2/27/2015

written by Kasabian

Alienation.

The word that I believe best sums up my state of mind as well as any other. I wish I could just feel something- anything.Even anger would be good, but even that eludes me.

I don’t suffer from mood swings, I seem to lack the depressive despair evident in some of the other posters I see on this website, although I feel that I can strongly relate to some of the other posts I see here. I’m not upset about a breakup with my girlfriend of the loss of the of a job- I’ve never had the former to lose and I have managed to hold […]

2/27/2015 5 comments

Sitting, Wishing, Waiting

by Matt 2/24/2015

written by Matt

I find myself just waiting.

I’m in the world’s longest queue and just when I get to the end, I’m redirected by a version of myself back to where I started.

I’d say things were going better because to everyone else, it appears like my life is picking up again. I’m talking to friends, showering, sleeping fairly normally and going the gym regularly.

But it’s not okay. I am useless at pretending to be okay. It is not a skill I have mastered.

Went to a different therapist the other day. She really was a lovely woman, but I told her exactly what she wanted to hear. Just like […]

2/24/2015 4 comments

“inconsiderate”

by count.to.9 2/21/2015

written by count.to.9

Long read. Pretty sure people are too lazy to read it all so i don’t mind if no one comments on this or anything.

I’m suffering from depression. I take meds that aren’t as many as the ones I took when I tried to OD and kill myself. I’m seeing a doctor once every week.

So after one session with my doctor, she told me to tell my parents to call the next day so they could talk. And my dad was acting like I told the teacher something he did wrong and that he’ll get punished.So he was pressing that I give him a hint about […]

2/21/2015 2 comments

Death

by restrictingheart 2/15/2015

written by restrictingheart

I’ve always wondered what would happen after I died. I think no one will miss me. I think that I am so broken and damaged I just cause other people pain. I can’t forget everything that has happened to me and move forward so easily. I just become a burden to others because of how weak I am. I used to be able to hide everything but I am just so tired I can’t bring myself to pretend everything is okay anymore. I am tired of talking to people and trying to fix myself. Sometimes I find myself hoping that I will get stronger, get […]

2/15/2015 0 comment

Tainted Heart, Broken and Scarred

by restrictingheart 2/13/2015

written by restrictingheart

I miss the girl I used to be. I don’t like the person I see in the mirror anymore. She is even more broken than before. All I see are my scars. Nothing else pushes past them. But I am not in the painful bliss like I used to be. It is almost as if the pain from them has just dissolved into me. I don’t feel anything on the outside anymore and all of my emotions and thoughts that used to keep me numb are focused on the pain of the past. I’ve gotten so used to the pain just being on the outside. […]

2/13/2015 0 comment

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