I guess I should start with a statement of “I know that I”m a really lucky person, and life, while not perfect, had been nice to me.” I am born in a really developed country, and have so many benefits that many other countries doesn’t have. I am gifted and loved by god in many ways (learned how to read a language through watching TV, drawings that had won numerous awards and got me a 60,000 scholarship money, performed dance for the Winter Olympics, top three in my school, an hourglass figure, decent face, and healthy body with no mutations…etc.) But I don’t see a […]
God
Let me tell you bout my month yall
Endless shoppin’, I had a ball
I had to ball for therapy
My shrink don’t think that helps at all
Whatever, that man aint wearin’ these leather pants
I diagnosed my damn self, these damn pills aint workin’ fam
In my spare time, punchin’ walls fucking up my hand
I know that shit sound super cray
But if you had my life you’d understand
But, I cant fold
Some poor soul got it way worse
We’re all troubled in a world in trouble
It scary to […]
I am a slave, a true kajira…i feel such an amount of pain for i have hidden it…. In fear of others… But why hide who i am… God this sadness hurts me deeply… I am not ashamed… Why should i be?
Hi. I’m 25, female and I’m suicidial.
I’ve had thoughts of suicide almost all of my teenaged years till now, but now I’m going through something that’s completely broken me and made me lose hope in everything. I have no one physically that I can talk to. But I feel like the only way out of this is to kill myself.
I’m a cutter, and the only thing I’ve been thinking about lately is slitting my wrists. I think about it all the time. About how I could enjoy my last bottle of wine, take the surgical blade from my medicine kit and slice downward my arms […]
How do you get rid of envy forever? If i can’t it will kill me.
Lucifer, one of god’s blessed angels betrayed him because he wanted his power. my situation is similar. this one girl i like i know ill never get but i still go for her. i don’t even give myself a chance for anyone else because i know i don’t deserve her or anyone else for that matter. that sentence didn’t make sense. anyways, i was just curious to see how many people have a big problem with envy. oh and if anyone has any good ways to commit suicide please tell thank you!
i cried last night. i don’t know why. i just did. i cried silently into my pillow, made a new contact on my phone, put in a random number and named him God.  I texted God, but that stupid exclamation mark came up when it hasn’t been delivered  so it made me even more sad. the message was not delivered so i cut myself.
I feel lost and alone no matter where i turn..someone once told me dat god gives d toughest struggles the strongest..but im tired of fighting, im tired of pushing back, i just don’t have it in me anymore.. maybe if life was different..but its not.. Im in never ending cycle.. My one wish is to go to bed 2night..and never wake up..
being brought up in a Catholic family, I came to believe that Jesus is real. Even though I pray, evil gets the better of me, and I can’t stop. When I sit in a Church, it being silent, although overwhelming in some way or another, I pull back my sleeves and tears stream down over my scars. I hear some kind of voice pleading “Please stop. You’re too beautiful for harm.” And for a second I believe, and some kind of hope enters my thoughts, but as I leave through the doors of God’s house, that’s it. I don’t care. And the cycle continues.
I dont […]
Hi,this is my first post as in such . I am nineteen years old and am a male. I have always hated myself since god knows when .I am 6 foot tall and people call me ugly and fat and incapable to have a girlfriend.I always felt shy around people and I always go by the motto ” I dont give two hoots what other people thinks of me”. I have so called “Friends” who smile and laugh at me and say stuff around my back and people use me to do stuff for them. Its as if I am their puppet. My mum […]
Why am I here? That is the question i have been asking myself lately.  I just don’t get it.  I feel like God is just keeping me here as entertainment. My mom is pregnant and felt like she was going to have the baby early, so she was in the hospital and got to come home yesterday.  I had soccer practice, but i feel slow and tired so i haven’t been playing good.  It just feels like the world is moving without me. All my family does anymore is yell. My dad says it’s my fault we fight, but couldn’t give me any reasons why […]
I’ve been in the hospital twice in less than a month and tried to commit suicide 3 times… and the last 2 days I’ve been back in bed with hardly any contact from anyone and I’m not going to contact people and be a burden to them but honestly I’m going crazy… and afraid it won’t be too much longer… I just want to die, but I guess its my fault b.c. I’m posting positive sayings on facebook like I’m excited to see what God has for my future. My mom has asked for my schedule but I don’t want to deal with her because […]
the first cut is always the deepest…
I just want to quit.Give me 5 good reasons to stick around…
For Christ’s sake!
If God really loved me, why would He do this to me?
I cant ever be happy,like truly happy.
Am I really that easy to betray because I put myself out there and give everybody every ounce of my being?
then they see I give them everything and just betray me…What did I ever do?
Am I really that bad?
It is really frustrating to put myself out there only to be betrayed and backstabbed….
This might be my last post……
No one would care so why stick around?
I’ve been racking my brain, trying to think of a way I could slip away peacefully, quietly, but I can’t come up with anything. Â Every option seems so uncertain. Â Who knew it could be so hard to end my life. Â It would be so much easier if something could happen to me. Â I wish I could trade places with a terminally ill person. Â Someone who doesn’t deserve it, like a child. Â I’d gladly take on their burden.
God can be so cruel sometimes.
Yes, i am dieN tonight, fuck god and his bullshit, cuz i aint dealin with in anymore..lol..ima catch tha bus.
is what I’m trying to escape
http://everything2.com/title/Working+9+to+5%253A+The+modern+slavery
call me a lazy fuck, but I’d rather be dead than whore myself out to survive in a world I don’t even like
I’m sick of being told it’s normal or honorable to be stolen too much of your time
sick of being molded into living as a robot .. sick of this lifestyle where the cons outweigh the pros
I swear I’m a danger to other people. Everyone that means something to me, that I truly love with all my heart, gets hurt because of me. I don’t intentionally hurt anyone. I’m not that kind of person. But something bad always seems to happen to people that try to help me. It occurred numerous times in the past. And it just keeps coming.
This past week has been terrible. I wanna keep going; I just don’t know how anymore. I don’t want to invite anyone else into my life. I can’t take it anymore. I’m beyond saving at this point there is no use in […]
Ever just watch pet fish? Watch them swim around in their bowl? Wonder if they are unhappy swimming in circles, seeing the same things, eating the same things, doing the same things? Does my fish, Flex, even know that my other fish, Murs, is in the bowl with him? Does he even notice the rainbow I put in their to help give them some scenery and something to swim through. Just like school, jobs, and sports are just thrown into the world to give us something to do. The flowers, trees, and ‘mystical wonderlands’ are just scenery to spice up the fact that we are just living in a bowl. Oh, and that fish next to you […]
failI am less than nothing, I am such a fuck up, I cannot do anything right. I try so hard. I cannot do anything right, I fuck everything up. I am nothing. I am worth more dead than alive. No one understands this, I am so fucked up, getting calls, everyone wants something from me, and I cannot deliver……  So much, I cannot do this any more, I try, God knows I try,, and even God has turned His back on me. I have hurt everyone by just being alive, and no one wants to hear me, not even God. I know God is dissappointed […]
Come here, Please hold my hand, lord now help me, I’m scared please show me how to fight this, God has a master plan and I guess, I am in his demand….
The assessment went well. Apart from the fact that she wanted to drug me up. I have another appointment on the 4th october. All I heard her say was ‘Hopefully the anti-depressants will make the voice go away’.
Lol.
I didn’t have the heart to explain why I don’t want daniel to leave, So I just sat there and blanked out everything else she had to say. And I went for smart, But as I stood up she gave me a wierd look. :I Thanks. I needed that confidence boost.
Got my exam results as well! I passes everything, Some only just. But got an A in product […]
I would love to believe in a God or a higher meaning, or that memories (or anything for that matter) persist after death. But I can’t. So with that in mind, what difference does it make if I decide to hang myself today or die in 50+ years?