I went to visit someone that has been helping my mom. My mother respects this woman very much, because she sais she had been feeling a lot better ever since she’s been talking with her. So I made an appointment and I told this woman about my situation, she said a few things that sounded reasonable but at some point, while I was talking, she stoped me and told me I have been a cheap w*hor*e all this time, she said that it is what I am, that even if I was doing it without concious, all the same that was what I am behaving […]
That’s all I’ve ever wanted. To be happy. But it seems further out of my reach with every day I exist. I suppose everyone wants to be happy really…
It just seems like everything is so far out of my reach. This book I’ve been reading, prescribed by a friend that said it would help me, hasn’t been helping me at all to accept societies heinous actions.
My dreams get worse and worse by the day… it just seems like life is trying to break me again. Like its trying its hardest to drive me mad.
Trying to fight depression and fatigue. I’ve been taking ephedrine and caffeine to lose weight. It is helping but a side effect is fucked up sleep. I work in a few hours at a job i can’t do and will be fired from soon. I haven’t put in other applications or done anything with my business (web design I’ve only got 2 clients in the past year) or potential businesses i want to start (game/app design, and t-shirt company). Im just moping on my […]
Well its been 14 days since the new year. I guess the only new me thing I started to do was cry myself to sleep, cutting, being dead inside after my life is superficially spent helping my best friend with her almost boyfriend. I can barely do anything. Work is my escape because no one knows, no one cares, no one understands me enough to know. I laugh and take care of the petty issues that exist in the restaurant world.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Fuck, yeah, I’m drunk again…
Anyway, so I noticed that when I drink too much I get some kind of anxiety. I’m afraid of choking on vomit, so I try every time, as best as I can, not to fall asleep. Suicidal as I am, I still fear the idea of choking to death. I’m doing my best to try and stay awake until I sober up. If you guys would be so kind to comment in order to keep me busy reading what you’re saying, you’d be doing me a great service in helping keep me awake.
One question: Do you guys also get this type […]
I try so hard not to feel. To not face what i’m going through. To avoid the tears, the anxiety, and the feelings. I love helping other people and I would do anything to take their pain away; yet I can’t even figure out how to take away my own pain. I want to escape the pain and reality of the situation. Help me escape.. please.
Destruction from the inside out.
That’s how it goes.
Living in this fear and doubt
in depths no one knows.
All that’s left is void.
A calling left unheard.
A person to avoid.
A person called absurd.
I thought there might be someone
who could lend a helping hand?
But now I think I’ve realized no one
really ever can.
My soul is too far gone;
but too afraid to leave.
There is no such bond
that I cannot but grieve.
No point in living;
only of that sorrow brings.
No point in dying;
only of that hope still sings.
I would have but one regret;
a seeing things workout.
But I would be long set
in the cold hard ground cast out.
A watching from far and near
of […]
So I haven’t been on this website in a while now. But I’m just in a bad place right now. I went off and started college and I thought everything would get better once I got away from the environment I was in,but everything just followed me. I started talking to one person who really wants to help me but the person is someone I can’t just entirely call up out of the blue and I don’t want to bug them with my problems because they have their own life and our relationship isn’t like that. And now I’m sitting here debating on what I’m […]
I’ve been so drained . And it seems like sleep isn’t helping at all. When I got out of class at 3:00 i came home and went to bed and just now woke up.. It’s 10:27 pm. I feel like shit still. I think I should just go back to sleep. I waste my life away … I never do anything else because I mentally and physically have no energy . I don’t eat anymore beside I’m not hungry. I am just exhausted. Thanksgiving is in a couple of days and I don’t even think I wanna be around for it. I don’t want to […]
Lies and begging for sympathy!!!
posts a long rant about me trying to make it sound like I’m crazy when I’m hurt by his avoiding me since he moved to the city and has his thin and popular friends around again, yet he will not allow me to post what I feel on facebook!
we guys deserve a much better life .. and we should get it ,, we need to help and to be helped .. we need to rise and will rise .. we need ourlives back and we will take it and pass it to each other .. we will never come down .. we are the uncoming down .. we are the strongest with our hearts .. we are the uncoming down … we are who we are … i pass this for each one of you .. wishing it will help you in time that nothing is helping me .. god bless you […]
I’m 19 and have been officially diagnosed with major depressive disorder and borderline personality disorder for over two years… I’ve been suffering from them for a hell of a lot longer. Meds are not working. Therapy isn’t helping. My best friend is the only person who can help me and she is taking a step back from our friendship because she is too overwhelmed. I think I am bisexual and I know I am completely in love with her, but my family would kill me if they knew about my sexuality, and she is straight and would not return my feelings. She’d most likely just […]
If all goes well this may be my last post here. I think I finally found someone, we’re talking about a plan of action.
I’m writing this to thank everyone here and give some constructive criticism. You are all good people from what I can tell, helping random anonymous strangers through there roughest times while going through rough times yourselves in some cases. I see this as a place that welcomes the strange, and the lonely, and the scared, with open arms. My only criticism for this community would be the people who only offer support that encourages survival. I will admit that in most cases […]
Im more focused on helping than anything else.. here’s some contact info, should anyone need to vent.
Kik; sweet.bloody.kisses
#; 317500735
I just stumbled across the site two days ago. Decided to start posting today. I have to say it helps. Trying to help others feel better makes me feel better, for now. I guess it is why I have a degree in Psychology. That I don’t use anymore because of chronic illness. Oh well, none about that. I am going to try to go to sleep with thoughts of sunshine and light. lol Thank y’all.
Older Posts