Hey, so I guess the title says it all. I am fucked up. And I’m only 11. I started noticing that I was anorexic when I was 8, I didn’t like eating. I never knew why, and I’m still suffering anorexia… this month has been one of the worst. First of I lost and amount of weight (im underweight), so then I can’t see my only true love, and he hasn’t texted nor call for about a week now. I don’t only suffer anorexia, but cutting, suicidal, and they say I have mental health problems as well. My cutting started in 4th grade, when my […]
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I’m 23, and I’m pregnant. I’m miserable. I’m 33 weeks and 5 days, and I want it to be over. I don’t want to kill myself, I just really want to hurt myself. I want to put my fist through a wall or window. I want physical pain to outweigh the emotional. I haven’t been able to work for 3 months and won’t be able to for another two, at least. My husband, the baby’s dad, has a shit job, like $300 every two weeks. He sleeps all the time and smokes too much weed. He doesn’t listen to me. We have no money. We’re […]
I don’t particularly like this. Idk. It’s a little weird for me. It’s meant to be more of a story then a poem. I think it’s a bit shallow and self-involved. Tell me what you think.
Once upon a time there was a girl
There were many girls, but this girl had a head full of words
There were many words, but these words were full of her sadness
This girl was full of sad stories made of sad words
Once upon a time she was strong
She was full of strength, because she was strong to fight the pain
She was full of pain, a pain […]
wow, 10 huge 2 inch deep cuts hurt like fucking hell, the bleeding wont stop hmmm idk how i feel calm and alarmed at the same time??? ugh! why did i give in again to the cutting i was doing so good trying to quit now i gave in and now im in blood and tears but still remaining calm
IDK how to overcome with worthless feeling. I have a beautiful daughter and I was married to her dad. I am really pissed that I am stuck raising her alone. I have had a successful career that I choose to leave behind. Now I struggle everyday with bills, work and my 3yr old. There is not a day that goes by where i dont plot or plan my death. I always think of a way that wont affect my daughter because I would never want her to be hurt by my actions. I am extremely overwhelmed and I dont get my purpose. I know everyone […]
Depression, social anxiety, idk what else. I cut, I’m lost and hopeless, living on the thought that life amuses me a little.. killing myself would mean I don’t get to be “entertained” anymore. Entertained… more like watching a miserable world do it’s thing. I don’t even feel like me, I feel like someone outside of me, watching in. I don’t care to much anymore.. but I hate attention, I hide everything, that’s all I really care about anymore, is getting away. I’ve lost hope, I don’t know about my future, which everyone pressures me on that I should know.. I don’t know, I’m done trying […]
I have survived abuse, car accidents, living in gang riddin, drug-dealing neighborhood as a child, being married to a cop and having him take my kids and do weird/mind fuck type things to get back at me for leaving him, jail, drug addiction, homelesness, being outcasted from any blood family I new of (I didn’t grow up knowing family really). IDK I’ve been through a hell of alot and all I hear from people that I am strong and what am I gonna do with my life. “I have soo much potential” I’m told.
I’m sick of being here. I am sick of the […]
i dont know how i can go through days anymore the friends i suposily know are all smart goodlookin talented at somethin they always have a girl chattin em up and shit sendin them calls texts while i have barly any girls who would even look at me in the hallway iv left my phone on for few days to see the loser who i really am not one single female texted me or “friend” calld me. i used to be great at sports was startin linebacker got respect from fellow men around me and varsity wrestling and used to be outgoin wouldnt care then […]
is it weird that all of my past will never leave my mind… my childhoood was horrible being bullied. parents fighting….. trying to be happy. my grades are really good like always.. … and then there is him. mr. flirty-shy guy … he doesnt flirt alot. but .. yeaa. idk wat i did wrong. we dnt talk like we used too.. Â ehh.
I still cut tho… unfortunately ive tried to stop but its too addicting… its beeen almossttt 3 yeaarss. that ive been cutting… sometimes i stop for a week. or 2 months but it comes back.. Â any remedies to get over a crush?? Â ANY?????? Â any […]
Apparently when I tried killing myself it was for “attention”….u dk what its like what iv been through..I know that I’v put you through so much but what else can I do..I’m hard headed I get mad over everything and its different now with us…Im never guna change Im always guna be suicdal..but I would die for you …I care about no one else but you babe!!!…and even though you don’t wana admit it..I believe I came in between you and your past lover..me and you were best friends and I did like you so much and I’ll never let you go…if you say its […]
I don’t expect anyone to listen or care, i just need someone to vent to and if it happens to be stranger so be it, Nothing will change.
I was disgnoed with evre depression and aniexty in oct.2011, they started me on medication, but none of it make me feel that this is all still worth it, why do i ever have to try to feel happy, i don’t perever feelings, they just eat at me inside untill,my body starts to shake with uncontrollble force, forcing back the tears in public and silence of my mouth, doesn’t stop the soiltary inside me.These though consume me and […]
I had a really lovely dream. I dont really remember it, but it was with my ex and we were on holiday or something. And I woke up really happy and I rolled over to his side of the bed to look at his handsome face and I realised he´s not there. And I actually had to think for a minute: why is he not there, I just saw him didn´t I? So I looked at my phone and I see a textmessage of my ex. I read it and it said he had always loved me unconditionally (which is not true) and that it hurt […]
Hello ime 19 find myself constantly sucidle or deppresed idk why evean when i try geting up in the morning i feel depresed i have already attempted to end my life 2 times although i seem to be more so depresed at night for sum reason i never cry apart from when i think about my feeling my eyes seem to instaly water up when i do . i have already tryed to kill myself 2 times and i cant say that i left a note or anything idk why i think its probley because it shows signs of regret and i don’t realy regret […]
For seven years now ive been lieing to myself believing things would get better, people would change….my efforts to hold on would pay off….but ive hit a point where everything has lost meaning and hope….my thoughts of suicide are my only form of happiness now…my life has lost value i no longer see the point in waken up….i cant escape my thoughts no matter how hard i try….everyone doesnt   realize the hurt i feel n why its so easy for me to jus not care about anything…they take it as a  joke n use me as an escape from their lives….ive tried to reach out for […]
I don’t really know what to name this post. By the time I finish posting it’ll be past midnight. At night is when my mind is most active. I think about the same shit over and over and it continually replays in my head. I hate having memories. I have an excel one and I feel cursed by it. I just want to go back in time or start my life completely over. I’ve always felt this way. I can’t envision my future at all. It’s like it isn’t even there. I just wish I could get a break through. Just once i wish something […]
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